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AIBU?

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Original poster

Do I tell them what their baby name means?

196 replies

imnotacelebrityleavemehere · 08/12/2023 14:00

Name changed as very outing.

A friend has just named her newborn Mari-Jane. Do I tell her that it's a very well-known slang name for marijuana especially with the spelling Mari? I realise the pronunciation is slightly different but there will be people who pronounce it as "Mary" and she will just be known as Mary-Jane. Am I the only one who thinks she needs a heads up before registering the baby's name? I realise that most names can have quite creative nicknames and there will be plenty of people who don't know that it means marijuana but I feel like this is just asking for mockery.

Thoughts?

OP posts:
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6
Jzp · 09/12/2023 18:03

I’ve worked in healthcare for years, a lot of the time with people who have addiction problems and I’ve never heard this term. I think it might be more common in other areas, maybe it’s a regional thing? Might be worth mentioning to them but as others have said it’s probably more associated with shoes!

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 09/12/2023 18:23

My daughter has a viking name and in Germany it means prostitute and its a very common name now..( Wasn't 40 years ago).. and spelt in many different ways. All names have a meaning.. some great some not.

But presumably, you don't live in a German-speaking country? Just like you'd be mad to have a baby and call him Peter, if you lived in a French-speaking country - but (as per the current thread), it's a perfectly good name if you live in an English-speaking country.

Find it bizarre that many people have not heard this term before, first thing I thought when I saw the name. Maybe I have lived a bit too much. Definitely tell your friend.

Yes, I'm quite surprised at this. As was posted upthread, there are at least 20 pop songs that use this term in the context of drugs. I'm extremely un-streetwise, but even I've heard this.

Maybe it's more common in the USA, but our arts and cultural reference points frequently jump between the two countries.

McrWife · 09/12/2023 19:21

Mary Jane also means fanny.

startquitting · 09/12/2023 19:24

McrWife · 09/12/2023 19:21

Mary Jane also means fanny.

Fanny is a girl’s name where I live.

Ilovecleaning · 09/12/2023 19:25

Forget it. Not your problem. I know a couple who called their son CAMHS (children and adults mental health services). Their lookout…

SuspiciousSue · 09/12/2023 19:26

I’ve literally never heard of that. I thought you were going to refer to Mary-Jane shoes 👠 😆

CampsieGlamper · 09/12/2023 19:44

At least it's not Placebo or Ashtray ( that's boys name innit?)

Engagebrain · 09/12/2023 19:46

I would mention it, I did when my friend wanted to call her baby Lana and I didn't like the reverse!! She immediately changed her mind😂

caffelatte100 · 09/12/2023 19:49

I haven't RTFT. Honestly, it would be best if you told her.

We read this book called Mary Jane in Book Club:
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Mary-Jane-Jessica-Anya-Blau/dp/006305230X/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1SD1QLF51VLRC&keywords=mary+jane&qid=1702150962&s=books&sprefix=mary+jane%2Cstripbooks%2C88&sr=1-1

It's about weed, even though I from the UK did not know this, many other members from other countries as well as my 17-year-old daughter knew that 'Mary Jane' is short for weed. I would feel sorry for the girl.
It would be a joke name for some people.

The book was a good read BTW! We all very much enjoyed it!

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Mary-Jane-Jessica-Anya-Blau/dp/006305230X/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1SD1QLF51VLRC&keywords=mary%20jane&qid=1702150962&s=books&sprefix=mary%20jane%2Cstripbooks%2C88&sr=1-1&tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-am-i-being-unreasonable-4959108-do-i-tell-them-what-their-baby-name-means

McrWife · 09/12/2023 19:55

Me too…

Torganer · 09/12/2023 20:05

Unless their child is going to grow up in 80s America, I think she’ll be ok. There are lots of children called Molly in the UK and I don’t think it’s hindered them.

GirlWithTheRedScarf · 09/12/2023 20:16

She loves the name. You don’t. Don’t ruin her dream over your thoughts as you might just lose a friendship. I speak from experience op. Trust me. Sometimes things are better left unsaid and this is one of those occasions.

AllstarFacilier · 09/12/2023 20:18

I used to teach a Mary-Jane and I thought of it every time I called the register and often wondered if her parents knew. They seemed to be quite posh, so I assumed not.

It’s maybe not as widely known as I thought and more of an American thing. There’s lots of Charlies and Mollys in school and they’re also drug names, but I don’t make the link there like I did with Mary-Jane.

Buffypaws · 09/12/2023 20:49

It’s not as bad as John

Pinkfluff76 · 09/12/2023 21:34

I thought it was a shoe!

Messyhair321 · 09/12/2023 21:45

Yes I would say something. I'd also say it's a type of shoe. No-one wants to be called after a shoe.

Falmouthflipflops · 09/12/2023 21:51

I'd be telling your friend that double barrel christian names are a bit passé and not thought very classy these days.

notlucreziaborgia · 09/12/2023 22:05

My mind did immediately go to Cypress Hill, and now that song is stuck firmly in my head.

If she’s got Spanish heritage you could suggest Mari Juana.

Cosywintertime · 09/12/2023 22:09

Don’t get this at all, it’s like telling someone calling their kid Charlie it’s slang for cocaine. It’s also not a well used term any more.

Museum10664 · 09/12/2023 22:12

@imnotacelebrityleavemehere words can have multiple meanings. would or how likely would they understand the meaning ?

MumofSpud · 09/12/2023 22:15

I met someone once who was calling her baby (she was still pregnant) Benjamin - BJ for short
She was in her 30s and me and my friends were students - we thought about telling her but didn't in the end - we were too embarrassed!

mondaytosunday · 09/12/2023 22:25

Haven't heard 'Maryjane' used for marijuana since the 70s! It's a nice name - leave it be.

InSpainTheRain · 09/12/2023 22:34

No you don't tell them
Never heard it called that myself.

Reigateforever · 09/12/2023 23:21

I think they should have the choice, not funny for the girl when she gets older to be jibbed about it.
I did tell one future parent, who wasn’t from the UK, what Fanny could mean in England. They chose another name.

Anisette · 10/12/2023 01:08

hydriotaphia · 08/12/2023 14:09

You know that the name came before the slang term for weed right? It's just because it has the letters m-j in it. I think this word be a weird thing to mention tbh. It would be like telling someone who has named their baby John that it's a slang term for a prostitute's client... it's true but not relevant because it's also just a name!

I don't think it necessarily did. I've never heard of Mari-Jane as a name before.