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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect parents not to have child’s birthday party on Xmas Eve

375 replies

I88l · 04/12/2023 11:33

One of my daughter’s school friends has a birthday party on Xmas Eve.
i think the idea of inviting school kids to a birthday party on Xmas eve is pretty odd, because Xmas Eve should be spent with family.

OP posts:
CurlewKate · 05/12/2023 07:35

A lot of people would be pleased to have an activity on Christmas Eve. No "shoulds" about it. If it's a drop and go you get a couple of hours peace. If it isn't, you get a b over excited child entertained for a while. All good!

Newsenmum · 05/12/2023 07:38

What time is it? Morning would be great. Tbh for one year I’d even do afternoon to start the exciting celebrations!

Scirocco · 05/12/2023 07:53

Some people have their birthday on the 24th December. (Or even on the 25th...!)

24th December isn't a public holiday (that's the 25th and 26th) and a lot of people will be working on it anyway.

If you don't want your child to go, just decline the invitation.

Camerasforinthehouse · 05/12/2023 07:53

Christmas Eve is spent running around doing last minute present and food buying in this house because we are badly organised. A drop and tun party would be welcome!!

TurnipMuncher · 05/12/2023 07:57

DH is working lates on Christmas Eve.

I'd welcome the opportunity to wear the DC out at a party instead of entertaining them alone all day. Even just one of them dropped off would help divide and conquer!

Roselilly36 · 05/12/2023 08:01

Not unreasonable if it’s their child’s birthday, but a lot of children probably won’t attend. A friend of mines Childs birthday was very close to Christmas she always held a birthday party in June.

Itsthemostworsttimeoftheyear · 05/12/2023 08:06

KaiserChefs · 04/12/2023 12:02

Because no one will turn up because the vast majority of people have plans or are travelling to their Christmas plans on Christmas eve!

How absolutely tragic for the poor child that their parents were obtuse idiots (like so many who have answered this thread while doing absolutely zero thinking) and booked them a party on Christmas Eve (regardless of when their birthday is). My birthday is Christmas. No one would turn up to a Christmas party. No child should stand in the middle of their party wondering when their friends are coming and no one turns up.

You have to book it when people will actually turn up, it's the only fair thing for the child.

Show quote history

Even if they’re from another religion or culture that doesn’t celebrate christmas? Are they still obtuse idiots?

Namenotimportant85 · 05/12/2023 08:11

As someone with a Christmas Eve birthday, I hated my birthday as a child for this reason. I think my parents gave up with party’s on Christmas Eve after a few years. Not the child’s fault when the birthday is. Plenty of time on Christmas Day and Boxing Day to spend with family

5128gap · 05/12/2023 08:12

I'd have loved this. Can't think of anything better than the DC having a couple of hours to let off steam with their friends while I took care of any last minute bits and pieces. Plenty of time left in the day for anything we'd wanted to do as a family. They'd have loved it too because with the best will in the world, I'd not have been able to fill from dawn to dusk with 'family' activities they'd have enjoyed as much as a party Out of curiosity OP, what do you do all day that's so much fun they couldn't miss a couple of hours?

x2boys · 05/12/2023 08:15

I88l · 04/12/2023 11:33

One of my daughter’s school friends has a birthday party on Xmas Eve.
i think the idea of inviting school kids to a birthday party on Xmas eve is pretty odd, because Xmas Eve should be spent with family.

As the parent of a young man who turns 17 on boxing day its not always something that can be helped

hby9628 · 05/12/2023 08:19

I think it's a great idea! Overexcited kids being worn out by somebody else for a few hours. Yes please! I do like the whole Xmas eve evening at home though so would prefer it to be earlier in the daytime pre-4pm
I can imagine if it's your child's actual birthday on Xmas eve you would want to do something to differentiate it from Christmas

Thesearmsofmine · 05/12/2023 08:20

I have a Christmas birthday, it was pretty rubbish as a kid having parties that many couldn’t attend because of the time of year.

Now as a parent I would welcome it as a way to tire out overexcited kids. It will only be a couple of hours.

Londonrach1 · 05/12/2023 08:23

What a good idea if your child birthday around then. Parents can do last minute things. Just decline if you can't go. No biggie. Yabu.

Londonrach1 · 05/12/2023 08:24

What a good idea if your child birthday around then. Parents can do last minute things. Just decline if you can't go. No biggie. Yabu.

Dontcallmescarface · 05/12/2023 08:25

My birthday is December 25th. As a child I used to get very sad at all my friends and siblings being able to have birthday parties and I couldn't. Imagine how your child would feel if you told them they couldn't celebrate their special day with her friends because other people thought "family time" was more important than her. Is it really too much for you to have a couple of hours without your DD on Christmas Eve so she can spend it with her friend?

Overthinking22 · 05/12/2023 08:30

It's not just a couple of hours tho, it dictates the morning or afternoon. Can't really plan freely as need to be back for the party.

I do sympathise with the child/parents however could do weekend before or after.

ThanksItHasPockets · 05/12/2023 08:32

The family have probably been absolutely scuppered by the very late end of term this year. We don’t break up until the 22nd which is the latest I’ve known in a twenty year teaching career. Usually there’s a weekend and then a few clear days before Christmastide proper.

YABU anyway. Just decline the invitation. Or have you found that your DC would rather go to the party than have enforced ‘family time’?!

DrMarshaFieldstone · 05/12/2023 08:32

Overthinking22 · 05/12/2023 08:30

It's not just a couple of hours tho, it dictates the morning or afternoon. Can't really plan freely as need to be back for the party.

I do sympathise with the child/parents however could do weekend before or after.

The weekend after is New Year’s Eve!

Figgygal · 05/12/2023 08:48

Ds has a bday in xmas week its a crap time for parties
We usually do theirs in January to maximise attendance otherwise its so busy in run up to Xmas and people aren't available.
I wouldnt go to a bday party on xmas eve you dont have to either

Sugarfree23 · 05/12/2023 08:49

DrMarshaFieldstone · 05/12/2023 08:32

The weekend after is New Year’s Eve!

Show quote history

Exactly and the weekend before depending on the age of the invitees they may have Santa visits, pantos, youth group parties etc etc.

December is just a busy month and no ideal time for a birthday party.

Dixiechickonhols · 05/12/2023 09:07

They might not celebrate Christmas, DD’s friend had a Xmas day birthday and loved it. Everyone off work and a party for her but they were a Muslim family.
I can see a soft play 10-12 type invite locally going down a storm to burn energy off.
It’s usually a working day too, just not this year for most due to how it falls.

Wellhellooooodear · 05/12/2023 09:10

Itsthemostworsttimeoftheyear · 05/12/2023 08:06

Even if they’re from another religion or culture that doesn’t celebrate christmas? Are they still obtuse idiots?

Show quote history

It's still daft though, if the majority of kids invited do celebrate Christmas it doesn't take a genius to work out there won't be many attending. Bit sad for the birthday child.

Conkersinautumn · 05/12/2023 09:10

Birthday parties can literally be planned on ANY day that someone might happen to have plans with family, Christmas Eve is obviously a big deal to you but not to everyone. If its the child's birthday it's entirely reasonable to have a party!

Hobnobswantshernameback · 05/12/2023 09:12

People who keep going on about "family time " are probably those who also "make memories " 🤢

ProfessorInkling · 05/12/2023 09:18

My kids went to a few lovely parties on Christmas Eve when they were younger.

It was either:
a) a two hour break from the DC to do some last-minute whatever
or b) nice to chat with the other parents while the kids played