To be annoyed at my husband's prepping?

[Laura199]

My DH is a prepper. He has tins of food stockpiled in our pantry to last for years. He knows I'm not really on board with it, but each to their own and I'm fine with jt as long as it doesn't impact on our household finances/ life/ space.

I also think we should be rotating his "stockpile" and not leaving things there for years. He says all of his tins are fine for 30 years.

He buys things we don't eat like tinned chicken??? And army ration packs (we have a full suitcase of this).

He's just had a delivery this evening of another 100 tins of food. We have no space for this and I'm at the end of my tether. Aibu??

I had a little laugh at this, I am LDS & while I like to make sure we always have food, this is a bit ott.

Cool. Are the mobile networks suspended during every emergency? Of course not. Would my life in an emergency if I'm not actively in danger or on the move be more pleasant with access to my kindle and audio books and everything else I use my mobile for that doesn't need a signal or internet? Too right it would.

If there's a fire in my house, I'll have access to copies of important documentation that's likely to be lost. Or if there's a flood, a major incident at a factory or military base near me, or there's a bomb threat and I need to go spend the night on a community centre floor because the hotels are all full with more vulnerable people than me who don't have pets, I'll stand a better chance of having gathered what i need because I've thought about it and know where it all is, in advance when I'm calm, and not trying to think it through in the moment if an emergency when fight or flight is making my critical thinking skills switch off (it happens to everybody). and I will have charge in my phone to read kindle books to take my mind off the fact that I'm in a cold overcrowded sports hall, even if that signal is out 😏

Honestly I don't know why people take such umbrage at people who prepare for various different scenarios. Firstly, it has fuck all impact on you if a random stranger on the internet keeps a spare battery pack for their phone. Secondly, we all do prepping to a greater or lesser extent. If you have ever had first aid training and had a first aid kit, that's prepping. If you've ever paid any attention to an airline's safety talk, that's prepping. Did you take a book to read in case the films on the flight were shit? That's prepping. Have you made a will and lodged a copy of it with a solicitor? Prepping. Store important docs in a fireproof box/with a solicitor/securely on a cloud somewhere? Prepping. Accept a vaccine? Prepping. Everything else is just on what scale and for what scenarios you are prepping for.

I can't imagine settling for a man who is so weird. Whatever happened to men with some backbone. I always imagine this type of man to also be the man at drop.off with the bike and looney kid trailer. God knows my husband is hardly a get your hands dirty bricklayer but at least he enjoys life rather than being such a weener ninny.

In most emergencies though, I bet the ninnies will envy his 4wd monster rather than his tinsopeas 😀

No I completely agree with you. I think it's a serious problem. At the end of the day if the worst should happen people have to deal with it. Common sense and history should show people that it makes no difference what you do because even your neighbour could turn on you. Look what happened in COVID when people were stockpiling actually causing all the trouble because there was really no need to panic and Stockpile I was in retail helping my husband out at the time running his shops and I tell you what people were snatching tins toilet roll.. still don't get that toilet roll thing lol but from elderly it was a sight of true human behaviour. There was a lot of kind people but it shouldn't be this way because at the end of the day op husband needs it explaining to him that if there was a war and the worst happened how's he going to stop himself being robbed it's not healthy at all in my opinion. Plus all food has shelf life so is he rotating etc, it's definitely OCD to that degree. I'd be interested to know if he takes any weed other medication etc it's very paranoid behaviour and totally unhealthy for children it could cause them anxiety. I hope OP can get her husband to talk to someone about it a psychotherapist would be a good call just have a session to see what they think.

Yes it's impacting OP financially I bet. OP needs to have a heart to heart I have said it already this is unhealthy and anxiety potential for children. You can't change the past or know the future your not living if it's not in the moment your too busy looking back or ahead so he won't be enjoying life as it is either x

My health is really variable so if I cannot cook having a tin of soup or some beans is invaluable.

I'm also not very mobile so snow keeps me indoors as does ice.

I've also been in the position of having no money. Zilch, not in the bank, not in my purse, not down the back of the sofa.

I don't have a pantry but I do have a few tins mostly three tins of whatever and if/when I use one I replace it.

I remember when I was a kid, my grandparents had an attic of tinned food. But they lived through WW2 and the Cold War so entirely understandable. This is just odd.

Actually no. I came down w covid the day before lockdown and for 6 weeks none of us could leave the house as it spread from one person to another. We ate our way through our stores and it worked perfectly. Neighbours dropped off fresh milk/veg when they could and we ate our way through the freezer and the tin store. Dh learnt how to make sourdough from a YouTube video, then when he got sick the kids lived on pasta for a few days. Couldn't get a delivery ot for over nor money.

@Yetmorebeanstocount

Prepping is mostly about normal, every-year emergencies: floods, power cuts, etc. The things that happen to someone in this country every year.

It is also about personal crises - if you lost your job, or your sibling and their family got evicted and came to live with you, it would help if you had a good supply of food in the house.

Fair enough. I can see sort of the point of hoarding your way through a short-term local crisis (a flood or a riot for example). But how would hoarding tins help you if you lost your job? At best it's just delaying the situation for a few days/weeks. At some point you're going to have to brave the flood/get another job.

I think if they are honest with themselves, most people who do this are giving themselves a little psychological comfort blanket but it won't solve the problem long-term. Having a few tins stored here and there won't do you any harm but its not a long-term strategy and it might mislead you into thinking you've got it under control when you actually haven't. I do worry that people who are doing this are doing the equivalent of sticking their fingers in their ears and saying "it's all OK because I have tins in the cellar". Not very healthy. You're far better off asking yourself the hard long-term questions about what your next step is.

It's sensible to prepare for potential eventualities.

But preparing is not just about stocks of food, especially food that you are unlikely to eat.

If you want to stockpile some extra food, it should mostly be long life things that you already eat and rotate them into your normal use (so use à stores item before its expiry date and buy a new one with long date to replace it in storage), not just the stores sitting there for years "just in case".

But it's more important to have a broader view, thinking about alternative ways to heat your space, have lights at night, have a shelter (money for hotel room, tent that you know how to put up...), can cook in different ways of no normal power available etc. And that you know how to mend things, and generally manage to keep yourself and your family safe in different potential circumstances.

Like in winter - have you got good outdoor gear and grippy shoes in case it's snowy/icy? And a backup way to keep warm if the power goes out? Do you keep water, snacks, emergency tools in your car?

In summer, have you a way to keep your house cool when there's a heatwave going on?

Do you know what you would grab (perhaps a bag already packed, or just a mental list) if there was a flood or your adjoined neighbours house is on fire and you need to leave in 5 minutes? Do you know where you could go? Local hotel, family, emergency shelter?

When cost of living soars, can you grow some of your own food? Mend your own clothes or appliances?

Can you deal with a major plumbing leak, even as a stopgap until a plumber can arrive? Know how to return off the stopcock? Know how to turn off power if flooding happens?

Do you have first aid skills?

Preparedness is about thinking through scenarios and what to do when facing them. And learning important skills and having sufficient tools to deal with things.

Stockpiling food that would not be eaten unless the apocalypse happens is a serious waste of time, money and other resources.

Also - there's a big difference between preppers, who slowly build their resources (including any stockpiled food) and who are then less of a burden when the crisis happens as they already have what they need.

And hoarders, basically grabbing everything they see in a blind panic when a disaster occurs.

Before Covid, preppers slowly increased their supplies of food, toilet roll, hand sanitizer etc from early January, one or 2 extra items per week in their weekly shop. May have got some extra fruit/veg/meat/milk the last week when the writing was on the wall.

Hoarders went out in the 2-3 days when it was obvious lockdown was happening and cleared shelves into their trollies.

I know in our case, we tried out (1 bottle of each) rice, soy, coconut, almond and oat milks in February 2020, as I was trying to find some shelf stable options that my family might accept. Some were absolute no's, but we did like a couple so it was useful to have a few cartons of each in a cupboard. As we use a lot of milk and with SENs in the house, we needed viable options if shopping was restricted. I made sure we had our normal amount of regular milk, but not loads extra that would only go sour before we used it. But I know others who threw out loads of fresh milk gone sour because they bought way more than they could ever use.

**
“Many of us live week by week when it comes to food and I think lockdown showed us how unstable our food supply can be”

We had no difficulty whatsoever accessing everything we needed.

This is such a huge waste of ££££. When the zombie apocalypse doesn't happen, all that you're left with is out of date food and ration packs which are only fit for the bin.

The food supply chain is not unstable it's the people that panic bought who caused it and I know because I was in retail working closely with supply chains during lockdown and they just couldn't get it stocked up fast enough due to the selfish ones having taken all for themselves. Had everyone bought normally nothing would have changed.

That in itself is a good reason to be prepared in advance. We know how people behave in any sort of crisis. They will hit the shops and clear the shelves. It was resolved fairly quickly with covid, but if it was anything where the food supply couldn't recover as fast (such as a fuel or energy crisis) we could be looking at the food supply being seriously impacted for longer.
It's panic buyers who cause problems in these situations. Not the preppers. Too many people aren't sensible in any sort of crisis and they make things difficult for everyone. That will always be the case. So it's best to be prepared, because you can't trust the general public not to go nuts!

It's like I said earlier living in a state of what if is never good. To live you have to live in the here and now and deal with crisis head on. Things cannot be avoided so you miss my point, everyone should stop stockpiling prepping etc because it's selfish and does affect the food supply. If every person stockpiled and prepped then of course it would affect supply. This guy is not a prepper he's hoarding and spending a fortune doing so. It's ok buying a few extra cans a month but to do what op husband doing is OCD. It's very unhealthy and no good for the wallet. Op said he'd ordered from army prep or similar which another poster said costs a fortune, which is affecting op and family finances.

I've never encountered a prepper who wasn't, to some degree, mentally ill.

Prepping for me is a bit like that bear thing. You don't have to run faster than the bear to escape. Just faster than the person next to you.

Storing massive amounts of food is a waste of time. You can't hold out forever. All you need to do is store enough to get you past the first few weeks. Then you can feast on the bodies of the dead.

Seriously though, I do think there is a happy medium between being completely unprepared and at least having some contingency for emergencies. I think far too many people don't keep enough emergency stores.

I disagree that if everyone prepped or stockpiled that it would affect supply. That's the point of it. You buy extra every month and put it away, then rotate it. It's a process that's bought in small quantities each time. So it doesn't leave the shelves empty and is actually helpful to everyone if there is a crisis, because preppers aren't making up the numbers of panic buyers clearing the shelves.
There is nothing wrong with being prepared. It doesn't mean we are in a state of constant worry about something bad happening. You have a stock, the skills and means to grow/prepare your meals, so if the unexpected does happen, you know you have enough to get your family through a difficult phase, whatever it may be. It's not about prepping for an apocalypse or living in fear of a nuclear attack.
OPs husband has it all wrong, that much is certain.

I don't prep as such but some people would call it that and I'm definitely not mentally ill
I buy stuff at the lowest price, so if the coffee I like is on offer I buy 2-3. Then I don't buy it again until it's around the same price
I do this with everything from shampoo to toothpaste to soap
Often means I have stocks of stuff but it saves me money. Some people call it prepping when they see my stash, I'm just money saving

@Katej82
still don't get that toilet roll thing lol

My theory is that vast millions of people used to make their "main trip to the loo" each day at work, thus using the company's loo paper.
Those millions suddenly needed more paper at home instead.

At best it's just delaying the situation for a few days/weeks.

That's the whole point. If you can cut your usual shopping down to the bare bones for those few weeks, it gives you a breathing space.
It is not about planning to live on happily for years after your life / civilisation has collapsed. It is about getting you through the unexpected emergency, which could be hours, days, a few weeks, two or three months at best.

You're far better off asking yourself the hard long-term questions about what your next step is.
You do that as well of course, and indeed if you are not worrying about how you will eat tomorrow then you have more head-space for the harder long-term questions.

Yes, I agree that people who hoard tons of food and think they are "safe" are likely using it as a comfort blanket, which is unhealthy. It is a sign of a troubled mind.

Found the same clearing the house of a hoarder

Oh really just found it so odd lol 😂 I'm sure a lot of others did too