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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed at my husband's prepping?

129 replies

Laura199 · 02/12/2023 20:04

My DH is a prepper. He has tins of food stockpiled in our pantry to last for years. He knows I'm not really on board with it, but each to their own and I'm fine with jt as long as it doesn't impact on our household finances/ life/ space.

I also think we should be rotating his "stockpile" and not leaving things there for years. He says all of his tins are fine for 30 years.

He buys things we don't eat like tinned chicken??? And army ration packs (we have a full suitcase of this).

He's just had a delivery this evening of another 100 tins of food. We have no space for this and I'm at the end of my tether. Aibu??

OP posts:
mumda · 02/12/2023 21:23

If it gets eaten in time it's not a waste.
Good inflation betting though.

Nochocolateuntilchristmas · 02/12/2023 21:25

I went through a prepping phase during COVID. Looking back it was my way of reducing my anxiety and feeling in control. I also quite enjoyed it to be honest! It's sensible for people to prep a little bit but within your means of storage and finances! Your DH sounds quite extreme. One the fundamentals of prepping is to rotate your stock and only buy what you eat anyway.

SD1978 · 02/12/2023 21:25

If he's not rotating it. He's hoarding it. If he's hoarding it convinced there will be some catastrophic event that he needs to be able to live during, then he needs to work out what is causing his anxiety. Stock should be rotated.

BitOutOfPractice · 02/12/2023 21:29

We’ve only just finished eating the tinned artichokes from the brexit cupboard. #middleclass

seriously, it needs to stay in reasonable bounds

Cherrysoup · 02/12/2023 21:33

I’d say he has a huge problem. My DH drives me nuts buying more cereal/peanut butter/toothpaste when there’s an offer on, but this would push me over the edge. What a massive waste of money, it’ll never be used so what exactly is he prepping for?

determinedtomakethiswork · 02/12/2023 21:33

He is mentally unwell. The chance from seeing a doctor is very slim I imagine. What exactly is he prepping for?

Hamburgler666 · 02/12/2023 21:34

Why is he prepping? Clearly it's not normal to do it to this degree. Can you talk to him about it?

uncomfortablydumb53 · 02/12/2023 21:35

Does it stem from poverty in childhood?
I'd say it's hoarding rather than prepping which is difficult to change
Could you quietly get rid of some to the food bank as he's just had a new delivery?
Are they foods which you actually eat?

madeleine85 · 02/12/2023 21:48

My DH is ex army and insists on a box of prep items in case. But it’s that, a box. A larger Tupperware box. With canned goods which he rotates out to make sure they’re in date every year or so. The volume you’re talking about sounds borderline hoarding tbh.

MusselTryHarder · 02/12/2023 21:58

Perhaps instead of prepping by buying tinned food he could prep by doing some gardening and growing his own? He learns a useful skill, it gets him outside in the fresh air and closer to nature, and you get your cupboard space back? That's how I "prep". Much better for my anxiety!

vodkaredbullgirl · 02/12/2023 22:00

Does he know something we don't know?

JustMarriedBecca · 02/12/2023 22:01

We had prepped for Brexit and had lots of loo roll, dry pasta and cans. Soap. Paracetamol. Freezer was full of prepared meals too.

Those first few weeks of COVID? Never left the house except for our exercise. It was such a relief. No wiping down tins and queuing to get food here.

I'm not condoning 30 years worth of tins but I do keep a month's worth food and household goods in now in the event of anything unexpected. Luckily we have space.

Everyone thought I was bonkers before Brexit and COVID. Now a lot of people I know in real life have supplies.

ActDottie · 02/12/2023 22:03

I think that’s a bit obsessive. I’d try to kindly make him see sense or perhaps suggest he speaks to a therapist or someone because I don’t think this is normal. 100 tins of food is madness!

Sparehair · 02/12/2023 22:04

Rotation is key. In Japan all buildings of certain height/ size have to maintain an earthquake bunker which they stock with tins but they have to be rotated out. The food banks do really well out of this system.

jesterdourt · 02/12/2023 22:07

Dont let him on the preppers board!

Ofa · 02/12/2023 22:10

Yetmorebeanstocount · 02/12/2023 21:01

This,
Everyone should store what they eat and eat what they store (i.e. rotate stocks), space permitting. And not just food either.

Then when pandemic / flood / snowstorm etc. next hits, you won't have to join the panic in the supermarkets.

And if you both lost your jobs at the same time, you would be okay for a few weeks, or at least it would help not to worry about weekly shopping as well as all the other bills.

But if DH is not rotating stock, then tell him he is doing it wrong. I would suggest getting involved in his 'hobby', build up your knowledge of the subject, then discuss with him ways to improve his 'methods'.

It may be that he does need to see the GP if he is showing signs of extreme anxiety or paranoia.

Show quote history

This.

Prepping comes from a place of fear (and from natural human instincts, especially in autumn). Don’t tell him to stop prepping, tell him to do it better. Divert that nervous energy away from internet shops and towards researching and list making: agree how many tins he is allowed to keep and how he’s going to rotate the stock. 30 years is nonsense.

topnoddy · 02/12/2023 22:10

Yetmorebeanstocount · 02/12/2023 21:04

Prepping is about planning and preparing for every possible eventuality that you can think of, within reason.

Show quote history

What like Boris being PM again ?

Jellybean23 · 02/12/2023 22:15

His prepping is out of control now. He needs therapy.

AllAroundMyCat · 02/12/2023 22:16

Have you asked him why he's doing this?
Can you not say why you might resent family money to be spent on this?

Yetmorebeanstocount · 02/12/2023 22:17

topnoddy · 02/12/2023 22:10

What like Boris being PM again ?

Show quote history

There are some things, like Boris Johnson, or large asteroid strikes, for which no amount of prepping will help.

Hadjab · 02/12/2023 22:19

Panderoo · 02/12/2023 20:41

I thought my 5 litres of soy sauce was excessive. Did he not have enough to eat as a child? I could see this being a root cause easily or more worryingly him being a conspiracy theorist.

You can never have too much soy sauce!

Shadowsindarkplaces · 02/12/2023 22:20

Is he into conspiracy theory stuff too or purely hoarding as 'prepping'
I would hammer out, what he is prepping for.

OceanicBoundlessness · 02/12/2023 22:43

I keep a box or two of the sort of stuff we take camping, so it gets rotated out annually and it means I've got a box I can grab and go if we have a spontaneous trip.. It is mainly kept just in case of a zombie apocalypse though.

FreshWinterMorning · 02/12/2023 22:46

Yep that's OTT. Also, what food last 100 years, even in a tin? Most tinned stuff I have in my kitchen cupboards have about a 2-3 year shelf life.

VivX · 02/12/2023 23:30

Yetmorebeanstocount · 02/12/2023 22:17

There are some things, like Boris Johnson, or large asteroid strikes, for which no amount of prepping will help.

Show quote history

😂😂😂

On a more serious note - this isn't "prepping", it's compulsive hoarding. There's no point in building up a stockpile of stuff you don't eat - at the very least it would make for an even more miserable post-apocalyptic existence.