To be horrified to learn that there are men .. TMI warning

[Doingtheboxerbeat]

This is not a men bashing thread
There are actual adult men that are unaware that periods can't be controlled like other body fluids and that pads and tampons are there in case of leaks. That we can hold it in until we visit the toilet.

At first I thought bullshit, then I realised, actually how would they know unless someone specifically pointed out the difference. I can't remember ever being told this, because I started in primary school before I learned about it at school.

I discovered this from a Reddit post so probably bs that a single parent man who was probably quite poor and thought that his daughter was wasteful/ too lazy to just not wait to visit the toilet.

I have never in my life met any man that thought this, but then again, I have never asked, but then I think about how many millions of people are uneducated about things that don't really affect them.

This is batshit, right ?

Well, if women only had 2 holes instead of three - as many men believe - we WOULD be able to hold it in - because it would be coming out of the bladder. Makes perfect sense.

My grandmother (born 1905) only had one child and I remember her telling me that she was on the way home from a doctor's appointment at an advanced stage of pregnancy when she decided to ask her mother the question that had been concerning her for a few weeks --- how did the baby get out? Presumably the umbilicus sort of opened up with a drawstring effect? She was utterly horrified to be given the correct answer.

My grandmother (born 1911) was similar. She thought that the darker line of pigmented skin from umbilicus to pubis opened up, like a sort of eyelid, to release the baby. She too was shocked to find out that they come out the same way the go in (s to speak).

I also recall going to the chemist to purchase sanitary products (Dr White's - or as we girls called them "fairy hammocks") and having to ask for a "lady assistant" who would bring the offending item, wrapped in brown paper, from a back room, while the (male) pharmacist looked the other way and busied himself with something else.

To dispose of them, we had to hide them until dad went out, then brurn them n the fire.

A different era altogether. I wouldn't like to go back to this sort of prissiness - it plays into the "dirtiness" concept that many (men in particular) had about women's bodies, and heaven alone knows how many cancers went undetected until too late, and how many women suffered unnecessarily from prolapses and other remediable conditions because of this sort of secrecy.

Yes, but in that case men must think they’re putting their penis in the hole that leads to the bladder? They mostly understand that they have a valve that controls whether urine or semen comes out of their urethra, so do they also think we have a similar sort of arrangement? Pretty sure most of them know that a baby grows in the uterus and not the bladder, so it’s the only way I can make it make any kind of sense

We weren't supposed to talk about it. Ew. Icky. Disgusting. Secret. Mysterious. And yet it happens every month to about 3 billion people.

Adorable. He is going to make someone a lovely caring boyfriend/husband.

It seems it really does fall on us as mothers to teach our sons that this is a normal, though sometimes debilitating, thing that happens to half of the worlds population. That’s not sexism, we will have actually experienced it so there is no better person to inform them about it (and I think teachers already have enough to be doing!).

This has made me realise that I haven’t really shared anything like this with my son (he is very young) but I will start now.

If it’s always just been a part of normal family life, the stigma will be ended.

I always thought women did have 2 holes. The urethra where we urinate from and your vagina. I never count anus as men and women both have these, so would have said 2 but not counting anus, only counting holes in the vulva/vagina area which is what I thought it meant. ?

YOU URINATE VIA YOUR URETHRA! Urine doesn't go ANYWHERE NEAR your Tampon or your Vagina!

So you've never had wee dribble down there on the toilet? Get the string wet? I've certainly had that, it soaks up liquid so stands to reason if it gets on the string it can soak into the tampon.

DH was educated by priests in a boarding school so didn't spend much time hanging out with his sisters through his teenage years (1980s) or receive any sex ed. My experience of visiting MiL was that used products needed to be wrapped up and taken out to the wheelie bin ASAP, not the open bathroom bin.
He needed quite a bit of educating when we got together, and credit to him he did listen and learn.

Men mansplaining female biology and refusing to understand female experiences is worse than plain never having learned. Saying that, women can also be very much lead by their own experiences and dismiss the variations that other women go through.

Being able to anonymously discuss these topics on the internet without embarassment is relatively new, and a step forward from the teenage magazines generation. The explosion of interest in the (peri) menopause isn't co-incidental timing, it's occuring as the generation of women who have been used to using the internet since late teens/ early adulthood are reaching this life stage.

Misconceptions can be harmful. Thinking females have control over a flow affects access to timely toiletting. The misconceptions over the state of the hymen indicating virginity encourages sexual abuse, even at a state level. In the UK, genital examinations were part of immigration visa policy as recently as the early 2000s.

If ever there was a thread for this video...it's this one!

Apologies if already posted, haven't looked at every post!

This thread is making me wonder what misconceptions my GSons are harbouring - they all know about periods, but how much I now wonder?

My 7 year old GS asked his Mum (who was being a bit irritable) - have you got PMT?

I have had baths during my period for years, and have never seen a spot of blood. Am I an anomaly?

Not an anomaly, I shouldn't think. But not all women have identical periods!

When my sister was 17 or 18 she went out for a drive with her boyfriend and a couple of his friends one evening and she said a couple of times that they needed to stop somewhere because she needed the loo. He kept saying 'Yeah, in a minute...' or 'Let's just go on a bit further' or 'If you're really desperate, you could go behind a bush, nobody will see you'. She eventually hissed into her boyfriend's ear "Look, YOU KNOW FULL WELL THAT I AM ON MY PERIOD and I really, really NEED to change my tampon NOW so we need to find a loo". He immediately said 'Oh god, sorry, OK' and they stopped at the next opportunity.

Afterwards when they were back at home, he apologised profusely. It turned out that he had indeed known that she was on her period, but hadn't realised that tampons had to be changed. He thought you just had to pop one in at the start of the period and then remove it five to seven days later once it was all over.

When I was in labour a male doctor did an internal exam while my husband was present. He was furious with me afterwards for allowing it. He's a biomedical scientist in the NHS, but had no idea that women have internal exams.

I had a female friend who didn't know that I wouldn't have periods after a hysterectomy.

This whole thread proves that in order to sort out the next generation. boys and girls need robust sex education which explains how a woman works.

It's no good just telling girls about periods, they will find out one way or another anyway. The boys need to understand about them too.

And any discussion of anatomy should not neglect the clitoris or pretend it does not exist.

I would like to add a suitable joke if i may..
A young lad started work at a chemist and asked the older assistant what he should do if a young lady can in for sanitary items and it was embarrassing.. The older and wiser assistant suggested he make a joke to ease the situation... Lovely young lady comes in to buy some cotton wool. The young lad quickly piped up to ask her if she rolled her own?!
Sorry was funny many moons ago!!
As you were....

@BertieBotts

Loving that diagram. I never knew I had a vestibule!

Imagine that - carrying a vestibule around all day!

Our school biology textbooks had diagram of male and female organs all labelled. Where the clitoris should be eas just an empty space. Fifteen girls silently thinking they were deformed, bunch of boys left in the dark.

@JFDIYOLO Fill in the missing space! Exam question 🤔? If it wasn't so serious it would be funny.

No wonder a lot of men require a bloody sign post.

There are very few facts that cut be held in.

But yes, I have been astonished at the comments I've seen here about bathroom breaks during class for girls.

Also astonished at comments on what to do if you need to dispose of sanpro in someone else's house. It's apparently disgusting to do anything but wrap it up and put it in your handbag. Same goes for the idea of keeping sanpro in your bathroom where guests can find it if they need it. There is a tone of 'it's your choice to have your period, madam, so you're the one who has to deal with it'.

And that telling children you can change sex probably isn't a terribly smart thing to do either...

You were doing great until "nanny".

That word is emblematic of the issue here.

We need to start using the correct terms for our anatomy, out loud, and stop with the euphemisms.

Belly is fine - nearly everyone will eventually figure out it's a word for your stomach or your abdomen. But the twee expressions for vagina and vulva and the complete absence of reference to the urethra can cause huge misunderstandings that persist down through generations.

You can move the string to the rear and sort of wedge it between your butt cheeks, then lean forwards while peeing, and the string will stay dry.

Agree (though there are ways to avoid the pee on the string problem).

It's like the idea that tumble dryers are the handcart ferrying us to hell. Never mind the fact that homes are covered with carpet and vinyl flooring, that offices and shops leave a huge carbon footprint, that hair dryers and hair straighteners also use electricity (but they make us look 'acceptable' so they're ok) - it's the device that cuts down on women's domestic labour that is vilified.

See also: telling them that not all women have periods and some men have periods