To wonder if we are all equal in Heaven

[Guesswho88]

I was thinking about those that have never found love or who have loved and lost. And those that have lost a spouse who has passed away but have gone on to remarry - what happens when the person who has remarried dies and is reunited with former spouse? And then the other spouse dies as well. How does it go down?

The priest at my MIL’s funeral said that at the moment of your death you become the best person you could possibly be. So yes, if there is a heaven I can imagine earthly stuff becomes irrelevant,but I would still hope to recognise my DH and other loved ones.

Whatever you want it to be. It’s a fantasy and not based in any reality. Which I am sure you know but perhaps find the idea appealing in some way. So make it what you want. It’s your own dream.

Depends on your beliefs I suppose.

Genuinely curious... What about those people who worked really hard and became rich but were good, non-arrogant people or those that were poor and had shit lives because they were lazy and couldn't be bothered to try and better themselves? Or those somewhere in the middle...? How would that work? Or is it just about the money, rich, get a shit afterlife, poor, get a good afterlife, in the middle, squeezed in the afterlife so samesame? Seems a bit callous.

That's why this vision of heaven doesn't work for me.

There isn’t an objective answer to this. Nobody knows. Different religions have different conceptions of the afterlife, and of course atheists tend not to believe in one at all. You can read about different concepts of the afterlife and see if any of them resonate with you, but ultimately there’s simply no way of knowing in any real sense.

I find it so odd that they say there is nothing, blackness... and they are ok with that!

But you won't know it's 'blackness'; you are dead. You cannot know if it is blackness or all white and shiny because there is no cognition when you are dead.
When you are dead, you are dead. deceased. Unable to cogitate. No need to worry about bumping into your ex, or the MIL you hated. You are dead.
No need to worry about mowing the lawn, getting on with the neighbours or wondering whether or not to LTB. Because you are dead.

I wish I was religious and had faith but I'm just not.

When my dad died, the circumstances were really bad and then the circumstances that followed were horrific to deal with (fraud, theft, use of his bank cards by someone he trusted within an hour of him going to the funeral home). I had vivid nightmares of him just being in nothing, complete dark. I hope that is just my mind.

I struggle with questions like If we have souls creates them and how does it cope with an increased population if the souls go somewhere after we die or get reused, how are there enough?

Our physical bodies do hold energy which gets reused when we degrade or cremated but what happens to that bit which makes us unique?

Not necessarily. Nde's are necessarily very short experiences. Nothing to say the second you pass you wake up in heaven. Of it's a transformation of energy then that could take time. People refer to seeing lights etc. maybe if you make it as far as Heaven you've gone too completely to come back, but there's a temporal space between your heart stopping and the gates opening

Should read; if we have souls who created them...

If you want an interesting read, try Journey of Souls by Michael Newton.

He was a hypnotist who didn’t believe in afterlife, but had a client go back to before they were born under hypnosis and started investigating the concept of before life with clients and documenting what his clients said.

Not sure how much I believe, but I found it very comforting when dealing with grief.

He says we reincarnate with the same souls over and over, so one lifetime you will be partners, another friends, or siblings etc. It depends on what you’ve come to learn in this life together, so you will have many lifetimes to learn.

Link would be helpful

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Journey-Souls-Studies-Between-Lives-ebook/dp/B001MTENOC/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?adgrpid=121055463550&hvadid=606174097842&hvdev=m&hvlocphy=9046111&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=e&hvrand=14305773551323763527&hvtargid=kwd-296274522600&hydadcr=28461_2402414&keywords=journey+of+souls&qid=1701336075&sr=8-1

It’s a question no one can answer. Some people don’t believe there’s anything after death at all, some people believe there might be. No one has any idea what form an after life might take. Your idea of heaven is very concrete and you seem to think we will retain the same personality as on earth. It’s quite a childlike way of seeing things. Who knows?