Shamelessly posting on here as I know it gets a lot of traffic.
I have started to write this out multiple times but end up waffling on and getting too emotional so I am going to try again without doing that.
Looking for advice on custody in a divorce. 9 month old son, husband is a good father but emotionally abusive. He has told me that if we were to separate he would be awarded custody of my son as I can’t provide a home for him.
I work part time 30 hours over 3 days and my job is not well paid. I wouldn’t be able to afford to rent a place and would be moving back to parent’s large home. They would be more than happy to have us and it would be a nice environment for me and son with plenty of space but would the courts see this as an issue?
Husband has a mortgage and a fairly well paid job. My plan would be to save as much as I can and look to get our own place once I was back full time and son entitled to 30 hours free childcare.
I also have a thousand pounds on a catalogue type account I am currently chipping away at. Never missed a minimum payment and pay more as and when I can afford it. Husband says this combined with the fact I don’t drive and would be living with family will mean the courts award him custody.
I realise I am useless, I am a bad mother in the fact that I cannot financially provide for my son properly but I know he has all the love and care he needs from me. He is my absolute world and being a mother is the one thing I can say with confidence that am good at. I know I have let him down by not making better decisions in life though and feel ashamed and guilty about this.
I would be happy to share custody. Both of our parents currently look after our son one day a week each to allow me to work. Would courts give my husband sole custody based on all of this? I do most of the physical care for our son, husband has only ever changed a handful of nappies and given a few bottles.
I am so very down about this all, I wish I hadn’t let my son down. The last couple of years have been the hardest of my life. I lost my first baby at 5 months. My grandmother who I was close to died suddenly and my grandfather has dementia and has deteriorated rapidly. My mum is just the most lovely person and I worry about her a lot, it really upsets me that I am going to be adding to her stresses with this.
Basically what I am asking is will I lose my baby? I work part time, don’t drive and would be living with my parents (I appreciate what a loser I sound) and he has a decent job and a mortgage. Sorry, I waffled again.