Edit: sorry for typo - “blanket”
Friend and colleague at work, we do a stressful job so quite an intense friendship. I work remotely so keep in touch by text a lot. She’s known for being very hard and isn’t hugely liked in the profession, has been stuck in same job for years as nobody will hire her. She’s good at her job though.
She can be highly critical. I just finished a big case the other day and she rang me to talk about it (I didn’t invite that or ask for feedback fyi) then started criticising things “you should have told them x”… “you were cutting it fine you should have gone down earlier” etc. She’s not my senior in any way. Case went well too.
In these situations I start defending myself because I feel awkward then feel like a wet blanket and get off the phone feeling shit and angry. How do I respond/deal with this without causing dramas?