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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To stop DD15 going to Alton Towers this weekend?

115 replies

TheSparkling · 22/11/2023 11:01

DD3 is 15 and is currently really unwell with Glandular fever (diagnosed yesterday, after a good week of being unwell).
The doctor said its basically a wait it out type thing, paracetamol regularly and drinks and rest which we are doing. One thing the doctor said was no contact sports for four weeks due to possible issues with the spleen caused by the Glandular Fever. This isn't a problem in itself as DD has been to ill to go to school for the last few days and avoiding PE is fine when she returns.

The problem is DD has tickets for the theme park this weekend and she is determined to go as it is her best friend's birthday. I was updating my partner last night about DD3 and he said she won't be able to go the theme park as the roller coasters will be dangerous due to the spleen issues.

Honestly, this had not crossed my mind when the GP said no contact sports.
Now I am in a panic because DD will be devastated to miss her friend's birthday.

Does anyone thing the no contact sports applies to theme parks and roller coasters?
Should I let her go?

YABU to let her go.
YANBU to stop her going.

(Also just to add, I am trying to get to speak to the GP again to clarify.)

OP posts:
PortalooSunset · 22/11/2023 13:00

She could go to be sociable on the proviso she doesn't go on any of the rides, as long as you can trust that she wouldn't risk it.

But depending how far it is from you I think a long day out like that when she's been unwell/off school would be too much for her tbh.

JustHereWithMyPumpkin · 22/11/2023 13:01

GF is very contagious, she shouldn't be going there for that reason alone, the spleen thing is going to be way worse on roller coasters than pe, she will get vey fatigued if she has full on GF, spending the day traipsing around Alton Towers will make he worse. Keep her home.

Barleysugar86 · 22/11/2023 13:02

No I wouldn't let her go, not even for the little rides as PP suggested. You are thinking the kids rides are all gentle but the lap bars hit the same place and I have been on many kids rides but involved a gentle slope/ bump at the bottom which could hit right in the spleen area. Also just pulling the bar down in the first place could give a whack right in the abdomen.

Lastly she will definitely need to rest. When I had it it kept repeating on me for about two months. I'd have a busy day or two then be laid out shivery feeling and feeling ill all over again.

Abouttimemum · 22/11/2023 13:07

Pretty sure Alton towers is closed for the winter tbh, it closes after fireworks night. Unless they’re going to the waterpark.

softfig · 22/11/2023 13:08

If she's got glandular fever I'm surprised she's well enough to even consider going. It knocked me for six for a good few months.

Abouttimemum · 22/11/2023 13:10

Abouttimemum · 22/11/2023 13:07

Pretty sure Alton towers is closed for the winter tbh, it closes after fireworks night. Unless they’re going to the waterpark.

Actually if it’s for the Xmas thing I presume then there’s no big rides open aside from spinball. Pretty rubbish for a bunch of teens really!

Appleofmyeye2023 · 22/11/2023 13:11

Glandular fever is a serious illness, it’s not a cold. I knew several people have to drop out of university for a year to recover. Certainly it can take weeks if not months to regain energy . The exhaustion is immense.

the body fights diseases best when it is allowed to rest, ideally to sleep.

To be off school, but somehow fit enough to go to a theme park where she’ll be on her feet all day, rushing around from ride to ride, and generally adrenaline running with excited etc, isn’t conducive to recovery and rest.

let alone the spleen thing.

and she remains infectious until the fever/throat symptoms are fully gone.

You don’t think for a minute that sending her with instructions to not do this or that is going to work? She’ll somehow be happy to stand by herself for 10-30minutes while friends all go on a ride. She is 15 and cares way more for her peer group and being socially accepted than she cares what you think at this post in her life. Teens do not have fully developed impulse control- that doesn’t kick in till late teens till early twenties they now know.

Violinist64 · 22/11/2023 13:14

Of course she can’t go. She has been too unwell for school and is unlikely to be well enough by Saturday in any case. Apart from the problem with her spleen, she will be exhausted after a few minutes and not enjoy herself anyway. In addition, she could well set her recovery back considerably and l presume she is taking GCSEs this year. She needs to concentrate on getting better in order to return to school. It’s really disappointing for her but just bad luck.

DragonFly98 · 22/11/2023 13:15

LunaandLily · 22/11/2023 11:08

Both voting options mean exactly the same thing.

No they don't yabu = to let her go
it's not yabu to let her go. They mean two different things.

Nineteendays · 22/11/2023 13:16

Definitely not. I was a similar age and just getting over flu and tonsillitis and was adamant I was going to alton towers on the school trip. It was a horrible day and so not worth it. And by the sounds of it glandular fever is way worse.

also, I don’t think the good rides are even open so she won’t be missing out too much.

Menomeno · 22/11/2023 13:21

I was left with lifelong M.E. after glandular fever when I was 15. I wouldn’t let her go because she should be resting and recovering, and any exertion right now will put her at risk. I know she’ll be disappointed but her health should be a priority. I hope she’s on the mend very soon!

Mischance · 22/11/2023 13:24

A ruptured spleen is no joke - and if her spleen is enlarged from the virus she will be vulnerable on some of the rides. Unfortunately it would be a no from me.

friendsfiend · 22/11/2023 13:29

Of course she shouldn't go.
Not just because of the spleen risk but she's clearly not well enough and glandular fever has a long recovery time.
Plus, it's contagious so she really shouldn't be getting up close with her mates on the trip there or the rides.

Cumulonimbusincus · 22/11/2023 13:34

I was really ill with glandular fever (months off school). It still affects me thirty years later. If she’s only a little bit poorly with it then she should do everything she can to make sure she doesn’t exacerbate it. Spleen aside, if she overexerts herself she could make the whole thing much worse, possibly into a lifelong issue.

Cumulonimbusincus · 22/11/2023 13:34

I say a little bit poorly in relative terms! Hope she’s better soon.

tattygrl · 22/11/2023 13:36

You are not taking this illness anywhere near seriously enough. Baffling. This is a serious illness that requires REST. PPs have shared their plentiful experiences of losing loved ones to GF, or had lasting effects themselves. I can't wrap my head around this being a dilemma: it's a NO! Dealing with her disappointment is its own thing - it's a shame for her that she can't go. But it's not a quandry.

LaurieStrode · 22/11/2023 13:37

Why is it even a question? Of course she should not go.

AbbeyGailsParty · 22/11/2023 13:38

I have no memory of the spleen issue being mentioned when I had glandular fever, it was the 80s though. But I did feel dreadfully ill. Would be okay for a few hours then crash and it affected my kidneys and I ended up in hospital. The full “glandular fever effect” might not have hit your dd yet and if she did go she’d need an exit plan for if she became more unwell during the day.

Epidote · 22/11/2023 13:39

I would try to re book the tickets. I wouldn't let her go if she is Sick. Life sucks sometimes but she need to recover.

blackoverbillsmothers · 22/11/2023 13:43

I had glandular fever very badly when I was a teen and it's the poorliest I've ever felt. Ill and exhausted.
Apart from the spleen issue I don't think she'll manage the day. If she's ill she's going to put a dampener for her friends too.
It's awful for her but she needs to see the bigger picture.

Original poster
TheSparkling · 22/11/2023 13:45

Hi - thank you to everyone who has responded. It is a resounding no to going and I am going to have a conversation with DD this afternoon about it.

My partner has offered to take both girls early next year when DD is well enough to go.

Just to add I put Alton Towers as the destination but that was really just to avoid any recognition - I didn't want to be too specific. The destination is a similar roller coaster theme park and some of the big rides are definitely running this weekend.

I am not going to let her go this time and we will arrange to go next year now.
Thanks gain everyone. 😊

OP posts:
Runninghappy · 22/11/2023 14:07

I do hope she recovers quickly from it. It’s an illness to it’s ruined my life. I’ll never know if wouldn’t have ms if I had tested, but I would urge anyone with children to take it very seriously. It has lifelong ramifications.

SaveMeFromMyBoobs · 22/11/2023 14:14

Another saying definitely shouldn't go. Both because of the spleen issue and that it's contagious. I get why she's going to be gutted but it's for the best.

Littlegoth · 22/11/2023 14:33

I wouldn’t. She is very unlikely to be able to resist going on the big rides. Teenagers don’t have that sort of regulation or awareness of their mortality in the same way we do as adults. It’s not worth it. Agree to take her when she’s better.

rtft - sensible decision

BabyofMine · 22/11/2023 14:41

Having read through people’s personal experience I changed my opinion, I hadn’t realised glandular fever could actually be fatal and otherwise cause such serious long term issues. I consider myself educated! Good decision OP.