to think boss is taking the P?

[OverTheHillAndDownTotherSide]

Boss is very senior in organisation and in early 50s. Sadly diagnosed with cervical cancer in the summer - early stages but took 2 weeks off at end of July to get her head around it. Op was brought forward to mid Aug but she went off a week before to prepare for it. Had hysterectomy and didn’t need any other treatment. Expected to be off for 6 weeks recovery which then got extended. Fair enough.

Then decided there was no point coming back before she had been on a 2 week holiday over Oct half term. Again, fair enough, her kids deserved a treat. She then took another week after coming back before starting her phased return - 3 half days a week. We are up to our necks and working 14 hour days partly to cover for her.

Was talking to another senior manager who said they had spoken to her earlier - she was out Xmas shopping with her sister.

Feels like a piss take to be honest. The only other person I know who had a hysterectomy was back half hours 4 weeks later and full time 2 weeks later. Can it really take 12 weeks to recover?

I appreciate this will sound really mean but we are a small team and have been flat out since July without stopping and will probably have to work over Xmas as well to keep up with everything. And likely to be made redundant next year down to business changes that see her role safe but not ours. :-(

I hope you aren’t expecting any sympathy.

OP, do feel any embarrassment for your posts?

That’s it exactly. Thank you.

When something like this happens to you, it becomes even more apparent how short life can be and how absolutely nothing except happiness really matters. If the organisation aren’t making provisions for cover, that’s not her problem.

Do any of us?

The odds are that the cancer patient is more likely not to see Christmas next year than you.
Sometimes cells get left behind and it grows again.
Sometimes its already spread.
Sometimes chemo doesn't work.

I've even had patients who, 5 years down the line, have a recurrence.

When you are a cancer patient you just live from one check up/bloods/scan to the next one. The euphoria of being cancer free only lasts a few weeks before the 3am fears start again.

Maybe having cancer has given her a wake up call that she works with some fundamentally nasty people who only really care about themselves?

Fucking hell, your updates make you sound even nastier, stop typing.

Ew. Your op was gross, the fact you’re still going on with posts like this is so shitty. You’re coming across very selfish and self-centred.

You’re tired and angry - that’s fine. But be angry at the people who own the company not covering her sick leave, not the poor woman who has had a hysterectomy due to cancer.

The fact you think she’s ‘traipsing’ around town when you know none of the details, just hearsay from someone else and the fact you think she should be working from her bed whilst she recovers from cancer is really gross.

I hope you never get seriously ill OP and have to endure shitty support from others too. It’s no walk in the park. You need to shake yourself here.

Wow @OverTheHillAndDownTotherSide is possibly a contender for the one of the most heartless and selfish posters I have ever seen.

There’s been some really vile people lurking around MN recently, some really hideous posters.

Starting to think it must be a wind up as I can’t even imagine anyone behaving like this IRL.

You have no idea how lucky you are to be complaining about working hard when someone has cancer. And I bet if your boss read this she'd be glad that you don't know how hard recovery is, how scary it is, how much more important her life is than her job.

It is just a job, quit it if you can't handle it.

I hope you’re right @fishfingersandchipsagain . It’s a deeply inappropriate situation to joke about though.

Your boss is not taking the P - she is taking what she needs

Your employer though is - if they expect everyone to cover all her work without re-rostering or overtime

You are taking this out on the wrong person

This - OP I just have no words for you - thankfully the above quoted post does have the words - read that last paragraph again and then go away and think about it.

You are being very very unreasonable.

This!

If you're all working 14 hour days to cover the work this one woman normally does I can see why she's not in any rush to return to that after such a harrowing time for her.

I was back in work after a hysterectomy 6 weeks later, full time no phased return. But I didn't have a scary cancer diagnosis.

Your boss has had a close call and realises life is for the living. If she gas holidays to take, she needs to take them. Don't be mad at her be mad at your employers and honestly just stop with the extra long hours, you'll all make yourselves ill.

This OP. Read this and then go and have a deep think about what a horrible person you are.

I don't say these words lightly - you are a heartless person. No matter what issues you have going on in your life, saying the things you have said on this forum is never acceptable.

It takes a LOT for me to be disgusted. Congrats, OP.

I haven't had cancer (touch wood) but I have had 2 c sections and I understand from a close friend that has had one that the physical recovery is similar. You have had several layers of skin, tissue and muscle cut through that then need to heal.

One thing I was told as part of my recovery was to get on my feet and moving as soon as possible. The day after being cut open, I shuffled around like a pensioner. As time goes on, you can manage increasingly longer walks whilst ensuring you don't do too much too soon.

And that is without the added physical and mental toll of having had cancer.

Why shouldn't she do some Christmas shopping? Getting out and about will improve her mood as well as stopping her from seizing up and setting her physical recovery back.

She doesn't have to be tied to a bed because she's not at work.

I don't have a horrible attitude I just don't have the same opinion as you. Everyone is entitled to recovery and time. But when is enough enough. Companies cannot afford to fund this for everyone she could be ruining it for the next unfortunate person.

I have worked with many women who have had cancer and unfortunaly they passed away. Time off for treatment, support, fundraisers, full sick pay. They wanted to work and just be around people and be positive. But not everyone has that strength or mentality.

Oh I dont have the same opinion as you...I must be jealous. One in Two will get cancer. So thats me or you

Yes, fuck those weaklings who don’t have the strength to smile and work their way through a cancer diagnosis and surgery. They should be kicked out of the workplace. Don’t want them eroding employers’ profits now, do we? We must always remember our duty to capitalism.

Clearly the company are happy to support her needs. You, like the OP, know nothing about her boss’ medical details, what she’s entitled to, what’s been recommended by her doctor.

As you say, not everyone has the strength. Maybe this lady hasn’t. Or maybe she’s been recommended to take time off. Or maybe her bosses have said ‘Take x amount of time’. Or maybe there is treatment she still needs to have. Or maybe there was a complication or they didn’t get all the cancer. Or maybe, just maybe, it’s not a fucking race to the bottom and a woman with cancer who has just had a hysterectomy is entitled to take some time to physically and mentally recover without others who don’t know her intimate situation being judgemental.

The OP is sour. But she’s shitty with the wrong people. Get mad at the people asking you to work 14 hours a day, not a woman who is recovering from cancer.