To throw a Christmas card in the bin?

[MotherOfOlafs]

Got a Christmas card today, why this early I’ve no idea, from DH’s godparent. They have used a shortened version of my name, think Mandy instead of Amanda and the like. I’ve never used this nickname, none of my family and friends have called me it, and to be frank I really don’t like it anyway! So I threw it in the bin. DH says I was a douchebag but I think it’s ignorant.

A couple of points, yes it was addressed to me and DH, but not my DD (DH’s SDD). DH hates cards, he says they are a waste of money. DH’s name is quite similar to another different name and he always moans when people mishear him and calls him that name!

This

All very dramatic

I couldn't really care enough to throw it away to be honest

Are you one of those people that 'tells it like it is' too?

Since the card was primarily to your DH and he didn’t want to throw it away, yes yabu.

it was nice of them to send a card even if they misspelled your name.

I understand how you feel about this, I get similar from ILs, but I wouldn’t put it in the bin. I put the cards out, hide the offending card behind something and eventually it finds its way to the recycling.

Ridiculously petty. Grow up

This pretty much sums it up for me! Pathetic!

It must be exhausting to live with someone as wilfully difficult and offended as you OP.

What a lot of fuss about nothing.

I throw out a card that my husband's brother's FIL insists on posting to us each year because it is always addressed to my husband (his name) me (my name) and 'family' - we only have one child and he always refuses to use her name. We don't send him a card so not sure why he bothers. It goes in the bin as DD would be hurt that she wasn't included. FIL's two grandchildren only have one cousin, my DD, so I do feel he is trying to make some point about something.

Just put the card up and be done with it. My Dd used to receive a Christmas card from her great gran and each year her name would be spelt with a Y in it rather than an I. No one was bothered by it and more grateful to receive a card from an elderly relative than not at all when they are no longer around.

Sometimes it seems that some people spend so much energy on checking they are being respected that they forget to show any respect to others.

quiet day in "Mandys" house 🙄

I dont get xmas cards at all. I get cards from "friends" that have literally not spoken to me for 10 years.
Dear Gettingbysomehow, happy xmas Sandra.
Why do they bother? I have no idea what they are doing, they don't know what I am doing.
All of those cards go straight in the bin.

get as in understand.

We had been married for at least ten years and one of DH 's friends persisted in addressing the inside of the card to DH and family, rather than DH and muddyford, even though that's how ours to them were signed. I just crossed them off the list and after a couple of years the cards stopped. Sometimes the irritation seems disproportionate, at least from outside.

Bloody hell! My husbands aunt has called me a different name every year on our Christmas card. I don't throw it in the bin I just laugh at her pettiness and display it with the others. You threw one in the bin because they used a nickname 😂

I think it was a mean thing to do. Yes it's early but they went to the trouble to buy, write and post it. They made a mistake with your name but people make mistakes. It was a petty thing to do

Yes YABU.

It wasn't your card the throw away and the reason was petty.

Yep.

The card was a thoughtful gesture. Don't make it all about you.

I don't address cards to the children of the household & don't know anyone who does. I correspond with adults.

YABU. Paper recycle it.

Our "first card of the season" used to arrive from DH's aunt long before all other cards. It made us smile and we looked forward to it. The reason for it was, I think, that she couldn't afford to send all the cards at once so she staggered them. But whatever the reason, I miss her late November cards.

Yabu. It wasn’t yours to throw away.

Childish

People call me versions of my name, despite me and DH only ever referring to me as my proper name. It really doesn't bother me, but I can understand why it might bother others. What would bother me about your situation is that this person either has no clue DD exists, or does not know her name, or has omitted her name on purpose. I would be speaking to DH about that.