To not want to talk every day at pick up

[Rememberchristmasintheeighties]

Anyone else just want to get your child and run (not literally 😂) at school pick up?
So tired at the moment and just cannot be arsed to chat with a mum (no offence to her) or the teacher etc
I have friends and am a sociable person but in my own time, if that makes sense? The monotony of picking my Dd up and having to chat to the teacher or parents is 😩I just want to see my girl…and go home.
I time it to arrive just as the doors are opening so I can just dash in, but still get trapped at the main classroom door

Yeah I always rush over from work and feel knackered and CBA to stand and make small talk for ten mins, just wanna go 😂 I do make the effort but I don't actively enjoy it

Some days I am just like this too! If someone approaches you and asks how you are/how are things etc. you could say fine thanks and how are you? It turns it on them and they'll start talking (you can zone out). Then when daughter is out, "oh got to dash sorry we've got plans!" The plans might be to just get home and put the kettle on, but they don't need to know that! Look after you xx

There’s one mum, very lovely but very loud and confident, always wants to chat and I feel rude as I always appear to be rushing away/wanting to escape 😬but…I do want to escape

If it makes you feel any better nobody ever talks to me at the school, I stand and wait like a loner (often there early as I rely on buses) then pick up and go. Everyone around me seems to have someone to at least smile and say hi to.

Why wouldn't you not want to speak to your dc's teacher?? most teachers do not have the time to chit chat about weather especially at pickup. Parents just milling around i can understand.

@ChainBastard Don’t worry, similar for me, it’s just this one mum and I am grateful to her for being friendly, but also I’d like to be sort of invisible and just float in and out 😅

@LadeOde Its nothing personal, I’m just an unsociable sod when it comes to these things

Yanbu hate forced interactions. I'm picking dd2 up early today for the dentist I'm so excited 🤣. I'm a grinch I know

I feel like this; I don’t know in retrospect how I kept up all the chat at work before working from home

Ha yes - I perfected it last year, arriving about a minute after the teacher starts letting them out (they came out one at a time when she saw the parents). That way most parents had gone by the time I got there, and I could just grab and go 😂 . Struggling this year, current teacher supposed to let out at 3.05 but sometimes 3.10 so I get stuck waiting.

But your dc's teacher wanting to speak to you after school isn't them or you being sociable, it's a necessity. You're not really making it clear why you don't want to speak to the teacher, the other parents to an extent is understandable.

Just arrive later to avoid the parent? I don't see the issue if the teacher wants to talk with you though? Part of the job of being a parent. Surely you aren't too busy to listen about things about how your child is or might be behaving?

Fake phone call as you’re standing around waiting. Just say “uh huh” every now and again.

YABVU. This is the community that is now the centre of your child’s world. By refusing to be part of it you’re limiting her social opportunities and being an unfriendly dick, basically. And you don’t even want to chat to the teacher?! Have you so little interest in what your daughter’s been doing all day?

Pull your head out of your arse and learn to make polite small talk for a few minutes. It really isn’t hard. Think of it as a job if you need to. Ten minutes of your day to invest in your daughter not being embarrassed by her unfriendly mum.

DH drops and collects at breakfast and after school club the four days I work so I only have to do it one day and it’s great. I get there bang on time so I can get DS through the door then leave straight after.

Bit much.

@Mintesso Jesus.

I didn’t say I didn’t chat to the parents are teacher, I do and I look friendly…but I don’t particularly like to as I just want to get home!

I understand how you feel. I didn't have to worry about this with my DD (she rode the bus or we had car pickup), but I sometimes feel like this when there's some other school event/get together. Sometimes I don't want to make chit chat, I want to support my kid and then go home. I usually have to be in a particular mood to make idle chit chat with people, which is quite draining a lot of the times.

Absolute rubbish from start to finish. 😂😂😂

Hah, I get you, luckily the teacher has no interest (/time!) to chat unless there is something significant they need to tell me. A lot of the other parents also seem not to be arsed so us lot just awkwardly look away or go on our phones or whatever.

Usually I'm quite a chatty person, like to meet new people, get on well with most people etc but I just can't be bothered at school pick up. Especially as I'm unlikely to make friends or keep in contact with any random person there. I figure I might end up naturally getting to know a few parents if their kids end up good mates with mine over time which is fine but for now I don't want to make small talk. I'm not in the class WhatsApp group either.

I always want to chat on the school run. I do it once a week and it improves my mental health because it makes me feel part of what's going on

In my experience, Teachers don't stop and do idle chat they only talk to tell you important shit.....parents ...if you want your child to be invited to playdates etc knowing parents is a big factor many won't ask your kid or accept an invite if they do not know you.

Not at all I've been at school gates for 20 years the parents often say X's has invited my child for tea but I don't know the family so they're not going.

Do you think that the children of working parents (who don't do the school run) are socially ostracised?

They are not.

They can be. I'm my daughter's school the kids of working parents are often only invited to the homes of other kids who are also in after school wrap around care, because ours has a policy of all children picked up at 6 when it closes. So they meet the other parents there. And quite often the working parents don't allow their kids to houses of none working parents because they don't know the families.