I’m studying psychology and believe myself to be a full on feminist. But with that in mind how would your family divide up the horror of going to war against the horror of staying at home? I’m really interested in this and am very aware that nuclear options abound, but….
Nowadays, given women’s supposed equality, which (lets me be frank) isn’t true what do couples in really equal relationships do? This is possibly better answered by same sex families but I’m more interested in male/female couples because of the massive history of putting women down. Most same sex couples have experienced so much prejudice that their decision on who would go to war would, probably, be based on the qualities I’m interested in. For relevance I suspect my own husband, father to four children, would insist on going to war through sheer fear of me dying and leaving him to care for the kids. But that’s not a good rationale.
I’m interested in couples, who have kids, regardless of gender - how would you split the responsibility of going to war?
I’m negatively attuned to think that most men (not all) still carry the myth that it’s a man’s responsibility to go to war and defend the family unit. For LGBTQ+ couples this might be translated as the more masculine of two individuals - but I’m really interested. Take the Ukraine. If you put yourselves in their shoes, would both of you go and leave your parents to care for you kids? Or would one of you stay at home. How would you make that decision? Was it based on the ideal that women are more caring or was it based on which one of you would better fit army life.
Want to look at a PhD studying this so am fascinated. Whilst this may leave many to claim I have an ulterior motive. I don’t. I have loads of ways to study this issue, but watching the Israeli/Palestinian war at the moment I’m just saddened at the number of people/children dying. The words of Sting’s song with the line “The Russians love their children too” has been echoing in my brain for many years. So why?