Shouldn’t my boyfriend worry about this? Does he not care?

[PotLuck3]

Been with my boyfriend for a year. We met on bumble.

I’ve been feeling a bit lonely as a lot of my friends have moved away. I decided to try bumble BFF but was sceptical and a bit embarrassed, so would only mention it to bf if it was successful or I met people on there.

I gave him my phone lastnight to sort cinema tickets and bumble came up on Siri suggested apps. He didn’t even flinch or mention anything.

I asked him later that I know he saw bumble and why he wasn’t bothered, he said “because I trust you”. He didn’t even know it had a friendship function on there. He said he trusts me and that maybe I downloaded it to reminisce on our old messages or something.

Is it just me who thinks if he cared, he’d worry a bit in the moment or at least ask? It’s not like it would be paranoia, it’s a flat out dating app on my phone right in front of him. No matter how much I trust him, I’d freak out a bit if I saw one on his phone. It was right there in plain sight.

Is this weird??

yep.

You’re the type of person to argue with a brick wall.

Stop being an attention seeker and trying to cause drama, when there isn’t any.

It sounds like he’s sick of your childish games and isn’t going to stoop to your level.

I found women's underwear that weren't mine in our bedroom recently. Didn't even occur to me that they belonged to someone DP is having an affair, because I trust him. I think they'd ended up in the wrong pile of washing when we'd stayed with family.

When I was much younger my DP saw an advert for plenty of fish pop up on my phone. He didn't even tell me what was wrong, just blanked me all day, including at a meal with his family that I sat though blinking back tears, and then at home went mental at me. Like a complete fucking idiot I was so relieved that I hadn't actually done anything wrong and could explain it away and reassure him that I didn't even stop to think about what his reaction said about his trust and our relationship. Is that the kind of man you want?

Most people with healthy self esteem and no trust issues would respond how he responded. You’re going to create self-destructive problems out of nothing if you continue to want to see his jealousy / insecurity / questioning of your phone apps as the benchmark of his commitment to you.

I rolled my eyes so hard I've got eyeball whiplash. At least I made it to 10:10 before reading the sexist man MN comment of the day. Everyone on here agrees that she's wrong, so it's hardly a case of "these unreasonable irrational women who all think alike and make our lives so haaaaaaaaard with their craycray" is it.

It's not weird. Your reaction is though. No satisfying some people.

YABU

I have it too and was telling DH - I said Bumble and he joked that he would upset when I left him. I just laughed