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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

...to expect the sodding health visitor to take my concerns seriously???

35 replies

kekouan · 10/03/2008 14:47

Just been to see the HV today and I'm fuming. I wanted to see the new HV about a couple of things (DS is 14 weeks and I just wanted a chat)

The person who was doing the weighing today told me that she was also a HV and that I should just talk to her. I mentioned a couple of things but didn't really want to talk about things in a crowded waiting room. She completely fobbed me off and gave me some terrible advice.

So.... who's the best person to complain to? Practice manager and PCT?

AAAAAAAAAARGH... fucking bitch.

Sorry, but she completely ignored my concerns about a problem with my DS and didn't take me seriously at all. Cow.

OP posts:
Lulumama · 10/03/2008 14:49

practice manager to start with, i should think...

what are tyou worried abiout?

Original poster
kekouan · 10/03/2008 14:51

there were a couple of small issues (throwing up more/waking up screaming in the night) but I really wanted a serious talk about his plagiocephaly (flat head) which has got worse despite repositioning. She told me that I was imagining it, and not to be silly. I could have punched her i was so angry... I am NOT imagining it.

ARGH

OP posts:
Lulumama · 10/03/2008 14:53

i am sorry to hear that.

re teh plagio. can your doc refer you to the paed? and night waking can indicate growth spurt, and thrwoing up could be a mild bug or gulping down air..

babies do this, you get all sorted and setteld, tejhn tehy totally change .. keeps you on your toes! frustrating though

fruitymum · 10/03/2008 14:54

I would speak to the practice manager and phone to arrange an appointment with your own HV or GP to discuss your concerns. Very unprofessional of the HV to treat you in that manner.

littleboo · 10/03/2008 14:57

kk - i wouldn't go to the practice manager as most hv's are not employed by the gp practice any more, they're employed by the PCT.... so thats the place to go.

Original poster
kekouan · 10/03/2008 16:05

I'll talk to the practice manager anyway, because i know how bloody useless and ineffectual the PCT is - may as well talk to a complete stranger for all the good it would do.

Sorry for being so negative, am still in such a bad mood - been in tears all afternoon so DS has been screaming his lungs out too.

Just managed to get him to sleep.. thank god.

sob.

OP posts:
squinny101 · 10/03/2008 20:53

Could be reflux this is what my dd had, the first three months were bloody awful to put it mildly. I spent the whole night crying and she would scream and throw up constantly. Sorry if I'm making assumptions.

Original poster
kekouan · 10/03/2008 21:49

nah, thanks for the reply though. He's started teething and I think he's throwing up because he's forcing his little fist into his mouth. He's never really thrown up much before..

was so angry earlier, ready to march back down to the surgery and demand she be reprimanded.

I have made an appt with my GP though, who is amazing, so he will be able to help me.

Have decided to boycot the HV... she can sod off. This particular one is a spectacular waste of space. Bitch.

OP posts:
lalalonglegs · 10/03/2008 22:32

YABU to expect anything more from HVs - just let them weigh your DC and fill it in the red book, it keeps them off the streets. Anything else is well above and beyond the call of duty - glad to hear you have a good GP.

Original poster
kekouan · 10/03/2008 22:35

a refreshing outlook... thank you

OP posts:
HarrietTheSpy · 10/03/2008 22:45

agree with lalalonglegs. Every once in a while we go - and after each time I berate myself for succumbing to the temptation. Honestly, ring your mum, ask on Mumsnet, call a friend from the antenatal class - all will be more satisfying and informative.

Original poster
kekouan · 10/03/2008 22:47

ah... you're all brilliant.. thank you so much!!

OP posts:
TwoFirTreesToday · 11/03/2008 15:05

Our HV told us oue son would grow out of his plagio and were incredably dismissive. Are you doing tummy time as well as repositioning? That can help I think.

I do the well practiced 'smile and nod' when seeing HV now, (well practiced from seeing MIL)

Original poster
kekouan · 12/03/2008 11:30

I'm putting him on his tummy as much as possible - problem is that he rolls over as soon as I put him on his belly!! :-p

Doing as much repositioning as possible, putting towels under mattress to lean it one direction, toys on one side, cot/change table etc moved round so he has to look to the other side... everything I can..

OP posts:
Original poster
kekouan · 12/03/2008 11:32

HV told me to get him to spend loads of time in a Bumbo too...

erm... I thought small babies needed to spend time on their backs for development

I'm getting one though, will just limit time to 1 hour a day...

OP posts:
HereComeTheGirls · 12/03/2008 12:50

Bumbos are pretty good for plagio as obviously they keep them from lying on their heads..bumbos and tummy time are the way to go really, time on their backs is really just important when sleeping IME

marge2 · 12/03/2008 13:02

Reassurance re the flat head! A friend of mine has a son who's head was SO flat on one side when he was a baby. I mean ... as a pancake... it is totally normal shaped now - he'll be three in may.

SpongebobComfypants · 12/03/2008 13:07

It doesn't always round out though. Have heard good things about Gio Gio (sp?) pillows, try Googling.

Sidge · 12/03/2008 13:09

HVs are employed by PCTs now, not GPs so no point complaining to the Practice Manager.

HVs should have a senior manager at the PCT base - you need to make your complaint there.

Original poster
kekouan · 12/03/2008 13:15

he's got one of those pillows - can't really use it any more though unless supervised as he's started to roll over.. heh.

Thanks everyone for the replies - has anybody else got any experience of very flat heads rounding out normally by themselves?

OP posts:
HereComeTheGirls · 12/03/2008 13:24

My DDs head was so wonky that her face looked misshapen, one eye was bigger than the other, you could only see one ear from the front, and her skull had a big lump which stuck out on one side. Now she is 16 months and looks perfectly normal. when her hair is wet her head looks a TINY bit flat on one side but its nothing that would worry me and when her hair is dry it is certainly not noticeable!

Original poster
kekouan · 12/03/2008 16:17

HCTH - thanks for that reply - DS's eyes are uneven now, and they were very symmetrical at birth... really does make me cry, so it's very reassuring to know that it CAN sort itself out.

Did you have luck with repositioning/. (sorry, can't remember from all the other threads I've posted about this)

OP posts:
Original poster
kekouan · 12/03/2008 16:17

HCTG, I mean. - sorry..

OP posts:
HereComeTheGirls · 12/03/2008 18:03

I had luck with repositioning in that it sorted out her torticollis so she could look both ways. Her head didn't really start to round out until she started sitting up more though..at about 10-11 months...she has hypotonia.

SheikYerbouti · 12/03/2008 18:08

About 50-60% of all health visitors take a module as part of thier training called "How to patronise new mums: An Introduction" The floow up is "How To Give The Wrong Advice" and "New Health Guidelines? Pah!"

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