To not mention on my dating profile that I have a child?

[Butterscotch81]

I will obviously mention it when I get chatting to or messaging someone but just don't know if I'm obliged to mention it on my profile? I have one son and he's 6.

Ok I will mention that I have a child or that I'm a mum and just keep it vague, Im not going to mention his age or whether I have a boy or girl. Surely that's ok?

I think it's OK to leave it off for safety reasons as long as you tell them before, or on, the first date. I got to five dates with a man once, decided to look him up on Facebook and realised he had a child. Massive deal breaker for me and it felt like he'd been purposely deceptive about it.

That seems fair enough!

From Daily Fail Australia

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7665023/Detective-Inspector-warns-paedophiles-using-dating-apps-like-Tinder-target-single-mothers.html

But do watch your back all the same.

You don’t need to put it on your profile. It’s fine to mention it when messaging.

@Deathbyfluffy

It’s not about being decent - there’s plenty of decent people out there who don’t want a partner who already has kids.
There’s nothing wrong with that either.

Don't think anyone on here is arguing that it is?

For all those saying that paedophilia is really rare - apparently not.

https://archive.ph/v6q2y

This.

Anyone who got annoyed that you'd omitted it would most probably be annoyed because they didn't want to date someone with children. So given they wouldn't want to date you, they'd just remain some random you'd never meet, so it wouldnt matter if they were annoyed with you or not.

Some people don't want to date women with kids so best to weasel them out and put it on your profile

I think you could be vague on your profile or put it in the middle of a large sentence, so if they claim they didn’t know, they clearly haven’t read your profile!

If you start messaging people, you could likely drop it into conversation, e.g. Here's a bit about myself, I work and enjoy XYZ, but also like to do X with my son/daughter on the weekends.

unfortunately, I think if somebody is a predator, or they’re looking for a particular woman, and that could be for any type of risk, not just paedophiles, they will ask lots of questions and start to find out what you’re about regardless. It might just make it easier if they can immediately identify profiles with children. OLD is going to open you up to strangers, if you know someone or friends of friends, it might feel a bit more comfortable, especially if they already know you have children and you don’t have to explain it. But still doesn’t guarantee anything.

It's not 'weasling' though. It's a preference. It's fair enough. They're being honest.

This. It's very true. Don't put it on there, but tell them early on

Exactly this!

I don’t think you should put it on there at all. Just mention it when messaging

I didn’t

I only mentioned ds when I felt it was relevant

It's not on mine! And won't ever be.

That was what I was thinking

Never introduce a new partner to your child until the relationship has been going for at least a year. At least another year (if not longer) before moving anyone in. That goes for all dating, online or otherwise.

I wouldn’t go on a date with someone if I hadn’t told them as I’d find it awkward like I was concealing something important. I think a good compromise is to mention it in your messages when talking about a potential date. Also, check out their profiles as some mention they’re not interested in children.

Paedophiles aren’t just online so I think anyone with children who dates should take the same precautions for anyone new and wait a long time before introducing and also not leaving them alone etc.

I didn’t, until I got into conversation with them.

my bf has adopted my boys as his own and we have our own baby as well

I didn't mention it on mine put put my social media links on there like Instagram that wasn't private so people could scroll beforehand and see. Once talking I would mention I was a mum but most already knew so I knew they hadn't been put off. I met my boyfriend and have been with him 5.5 years we now have a child together ☺️

Just don’t mention it on your profile and then two or three messages in if they ask what you’ve been up to then mention that you have a kid. That’s fine. If someone is targeting mothers because they want access to kids they’ll go for the obvious ones

Ok so if I do mention it on my profile that I have a child, how can I minimize the chance of meeting a paedophile? You can’t. They are everywhere. In every profession, in every social setting, in every walk of life. All you can do is be very selective about where your child goes and how much time they spend with people.

I don’t think that omitting that you’re a parent is anywhere near enough to protect children from predators. What comes closer is not introducing them to your child until you’re at the stage where you’re talking seriously about the future (and if that happens within the first 12 months, it’s far too soon) and teaching your child that if anyone ever says or does anything that makes them even slightly uncomfortable, then it doesn’t matter what they’ve been told or threatened with, you will always believe them and protect them.