To not wear a poppy?

[Notjustmesurely]

I just don’t like how it’s expected or assumed you will wear one.
A friend at work bought me a poppy bracelet type thing which was kind of her but I literally wore it for that one shift and haven’t worn it since.
I appreciate its symbolism but don’t appreciate the assumption that everyone is going to be wearing one or HAS
to wear one to appreciate the cause.
If I were to wear one it would be for the conscripts who had no choice in the matter during the world wars. Not for the “modern day” political wars that the UK has involved itself in. Help for heroes and all that. The charity should come from the politicians who vote for it imo?
Newsreaders and celebs slated for not wearing one as well, what’s that all about.
Dunno it just all seems a bit fascist these days.
I always have and always will observe the two minutes silence tho.

"My DH served in the military. People who don't wear a poppy (or wear one of those stupid vegan 'white poppies' instead) are incredibly disrespectful in my eyes."

I have family members who fought in the wars, including some who died. I don't wear a poppy but I do think about the lives lost or ruined. I absolutely abhor all the militaristic traditions around Remembrance Day because I think it glorifies war. Some of my family members who fought or lost family members feel exactly the same way.

I don't wear one any more. I haven't worn one for a few years now.

I observe the Armistice Day and Remembrance Day silences and I have every respect for victims of any war. I grew up with elderly relatives who either fought or lost loved ones in both World Wars and I always think about them and what they went through.

However, I find it incredibly distasteful and unpleasant that Remembrance Day appears to have turned into some kind of weird, showy War Christmas with businesses putting up displays of giant poppies, figures of sad-looking soldiers and military stuff outside and people hanging union flags on their houses with a badly-drawn poppy stencilled on them. That's not raising any money for the British Legion and it's not an appropriate memorial to the dead, in my opinion.

It's also undeniable that the poppy symbol has been adopted by war-glorifying far-right racists as a year-round sign of so-called patriotism which has absolutely nothing to do with remembering the dead, and the British Legion has done very, very little, beyond putting out the occasional mealy-mouthed statement, to counteract or condemn this. The British Legion also sells a ton of terrible tat which in my opinion has encouraged both the war-obsessed 'patriots' (golf umbrella with Spitfires on it, anyone? Badge that combines the poppy with the badge of your favourite football or rugby team? Poppy-labelled bottles of gin? Keyrings in the shape of fighter jets?) and the tasteless Happy War Christmas types.

There are also endless statements on social media like a picture of WW1 soldier in the trenches captioned 'They fought for our freedom' which suggests that most people don't actually have a clue what WW1 was actually about or what anyone was actually dying for.

Nobody is forcing you to do anything. The irony is that these soldiers died to ensure your right to not be forced to do such things.

You don't 'have' to do anything. What you do, think and wear is absolutely up to you.

I can't be doing with this peer pressure of 'you must do this' or 'you must do that'.

It was bad enough with clapping for the NHS during covid.

You decide what you support and what you remember, and you mark those things how you wish. Wearing a poppy or not wearing one won't make you a better or worse person.

I also despised the Covid clapping.

@ManateeFair I actually agree with a lot of what you've said about some people turning Remembrance into some kind of war Christmas. I too cannot stand the facebook posts that people share that originate from far right groups. I also don't agree with the poppy fascism where any public figure forgets or chooses not to where a poppy gets a trial in the court of public opinion. But I take the view that I'll rise above the hijacking and take a moment to reflect on the sacrifices previous generations, and unfortunately my own have made so that I can sleep safely. I know some wars have been questionable, but the soldiers didn't have a choice, and the poppy solemnly remembers the futility of war and those who died fighting in them. It is not a celebration or glorification.

I do however find the white poppy offensive. I would rather people not wear one at all. The poppy is a symbol adopted from the growth of poppies in Flanders, and adopted as a symbol of remembrance to those who never returned from The Great War. I have no issue with remembering civilians, but use another symbol. That's my request, I don't insist or lobby for them to be banned.

"Well, apart from the people on this thread saying they are disgusted by people who don't wear them, have no respect for people who don't wear them".

They are reacting to those people (like you) being all holier-than-thou about their choice not to wear one. That's pretty much the point I was making. Yet you chose to ignore it in favour of telling us all how righteous you are. Do you honestly think you're special in finding war horrific? Do you not realise how offensive you are by implying that people who choose to wear a poppy are somehow celebrating warfare?

Don't wear a poppy - I don't really give a shit. Try and tell me how much better you are than me because you don't wear a poppy and I'm much more likely to react.

Unless you are a young Irish football player, then you get blasted for not observing all things to do with remembrance

@user1496146479 I agree this is a problem. Its hardly charity and remembrance if you feel pressured into it. I am sorry that people feel that they cannot support the poppy appeal where the RBL do a wonderful job in assisting injured and traumatised service personnel. I just wish people could see beyond the side shows and focus on what it is really about, remembering the futility of war and those who died and were injured fighting in them.

‘Nobody is forcing you to do anything.’

the money is going to a military charity. They sell the poppies and keep the profit.
I don’t want to donate to a military charity therefore don’t buy a poppy.

And no, ‘they’ didn’t die for my freedom.

I am sorry that people feel that they cannot support the poppy appeal where the RBL do a wonderful job in assisting injured and traumatised service personnel.

A different way of looking at it is possibly giving money to suppirt soldiers who shot civilians on Bloody Sunday. Surely you can stretch your imagination to see why some would balk.

If poppies didn't exist the outraged would simply find something else to be outraged about.
I collect for the marie curie daffodil appeal. Loads of people donate and don't take a daffodil, particularly towards the end of the month, they may already have one but donate anyway or they just don't want one.

You're reading too much into it.

It's just a mark of respect for those who died for your freedom. That's it.

I'm happy to wear one and whilst I understand its freedom of choice and rightly so I don't understand why those who sacrified their lives for us aren't worthy of a small gesture of remembrance. I'm not sure mumsnet is representative on this as everyone I know very much supports the poppy.

Don't be so ridiculous. You can't punish the majority for the actions of a few.

Should we stop donating to Unicef and helping millions of children world wide because of the actions of a few aid workers in the Congo?

I wear one but if someone chooses not to, it is a decision I will not criticise. My great uncle served in WW2 so you could have the freedoms we have.

What makes someone "a glorious dead" person? Are any paras who murdered innocent civilians on bloody sunday or those involved in the Ballymurphy massacre and who have since passed away "glorious dead"? What about the ones who colluded with the UVF to murder the Miami Showband? Or maybe those involved in the Boer concentration camps or those involved in putting down the Mau Mau uprising or the Batang Kali massacre or the Hola massacre? Are they all "glorious dead" too?

If we're including those listed above, we might as well add in members of the IRA as glorious dead. After all, they murdered innocent civilians too in pursuit of political aims. The only difference is one lot were sanctioned and supported by their government and the other were straight terrorists.

You kiss my point, possibly on purpose. My point is that someone from Derry just won't be interested in giving money to those people. They have a point of view as well, and a legitimate one.

White poppies are ridiculous, either wear the proper coloured poppy or don't wear one at all.
Also nobody is bothered if you decide to wear a poppy or not.

??? What a strange comment!

There is nothing 'ridiculous' about wearing white poppies!

https://www.ppu.org.uk/remembrance-white-poppies

@Notjustmesurely Please yourself! If you don't want to wear a poppy, then don't. No-one's forcing you to.

I shall be wearing one. Because I choose to. And I am certainly not asking people if I am being unreasonable to wear one, because I don't care what other people think.

How is wearing a poppy fascist
?????

Given how many thousands of Irishmen paid the ultimate sactifice in the world wars I would think that sad that they won't respect their own countrymen.

That or they have no grasp of their own history.

I think it's important that current soldiers feel that they are supported and respected. It's a brave thing to be a soldier - even when the causes of certain conflicts are judged differently with hindsight, the people who fought in them felt they were serving their country and protecting the population. That deserves recognition and remembrance. Former soldiers aren't always looked after as they should be - the poppy money is therefore important.

No one is forced to wear one, but people died to give you that choice. I judge people who make a point of not buying one, as some kind of statement.

Wear a white one so the rest of us know you’re a prick

Hear hear, @belleager. For some of us the British army has been an instrument of oppression, a cold-blooded killer of unarmed civilians, subsequently covered up by the government. I say that as someone who had great-uncles who were in the British army. Several fought in WWI — one died at Mons, one lost a leg at Gallipoli. Like most soldiers of their background, they joined up because they were grindingly poor.