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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take DC out of school for two weeks for a holiday?

253 replies

CroccyWoccy · 28/10/2023 22:44

Thinking about taking the family on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday next year, but having looked into it, we would have to take the DC out of school for a fortnight to make it work.

They have good attendance record - I have never taken them out for any reason before and they are rarely sick.

I was hoping we could do the holiday only taking them out for 5 days, but it isn’t feasible, to make it work they would need to miss two weeks (though one day is an inset day, so 9 days in total).

Is this too long? Either in terms of lost education or the amount of trouble we’d be in? DC will be Y6 and Y3, holiday would be tacked onto October half term.

OP posts:
Parker231 · 29/10/2023 06:12

Over a two week period they will have missed whole topics in subjects - will you be able to cover the material missed?

FloweryName · 29/10/2023 06:17

You really shouldn’t do this in Y6.

Dragonsandcats · 29/10/2023 06:22

i would. Definitely take note of @LostMySocks though and make sure you don’t miss secondary school application deadlines

smartiesneberhadtheanswer · 29/10/2023 06:29

FloweryName · 29/10/2023 06:17

You really shouldn’t do this in Y6.

Year 6 is a dead year, you must be confused with the secondary school years

I haven't even decided if I'll allow my DC to sit SATs OP,

Original poster
CroccyWoccy · 29/10/2023 06:29

To answer some questions:

-yes they could do the trip at any time in their lifetime, but on the basis that I wouldn’t take them out of school in secondary, it’s the only opportunity we’d have to do this trip as a family

-there’s no compelling reason (family connection etc) for the trip, but it’s an amazing place to experience. Definitely not Disney or AI.

-this part of the world has extremes of hot and cold which mean there’s only a short season that’s suitable for travel. We need 3 weeks for the trip and i thought we could do it with our 2 week half term + 1 week of missed school, but part of the route shuts in mid October for the winter so I’d have to bring all the dates forward a week to be viable.

OP posts:
Original poster
CroccyWoccy · 29/10/2023 06:37

LostMySocks · 28/10/2023 23:18

If you do go away remember that school applications for secondary close in late October with open days in September and early October unless you do them in Y5.

Missed open days would be a pain, but there’s only really one secondary that’s a realistic option for us so the decision making is already done. It would just be a chance for DC to see the school.

OP posts:
BethDuttonsTwin · 29/10/2023 06:40

CroccyWoccy · 29/10/2023 06:29

To answer some questions:

-yes they could do the trip at any time in their lifetime, but on the basis that I wouldn’t take them out of school in secondary, it’s the only opportunity we’d have to do this trip as a family

-there’s no compelling reason (family connection etc) for the trip, but it’s an amazing place to experience. Definitely not Disney or AI.

-this part of the world has extremes of hot and cold which mean there’s only a short season that’s suitable for travel. We need 3 weeks for the trip and i thought we could do it with our 2 week half term + 1 week of missed school, but part of the route shuts in mid October for the winter so I’d have to bring all the dates forward a week to be viable.

It's fine. Don't listen to the doom and groomers. You're not going to make a habit of it and they'll not lose a topic that they'll never be able to catch up on. Ground gets re-covered especially when it's coming up to SATS - which is just learning by rote and endless practice papers anyway, because they want them to pass as it impacts Ofsted.

You're only mistake was asking here on MN who are notoriously against term time holidays.

LimePi · 29/10/2023 06:42

Patagonia? :)

I would do it. It’s possible to catch up on a missed topic too (if you can’t walk them through yourself, get a tutor for few lessons)

EasterIssland · 29/10/2023 06:48

I’m doing this year in May. Taking my son out for 8 days + half term. We’re flying to Asia. Flying in May was £600pp. Flying in August 1.2k. Academically he’s doing well and I know it won’t take him much to recover whatever he’s missed whilst we are away. He’s in Y1. Travelling and seeing other cultures and being with their parents is also part of the learning process kids go through so I’d not worry op. Go and enjoy

Kittenkitty · 29/10/2023 06:48

one last possibly silly point - school Christmas concerts usually start rehearsing after October half term at our school. So year 6 might miss a part in their final year.

YikYok · 29/10/2023 06:50

Yanbu. Year 6 was a total waste of time for my dd. They spent the ENTIRE Autumn term drilling maths and English for SATS, which she could already so. They dropped all the other subjects to “catch up” after SATS (so then did proper no maths and English so she fell back again because of the massive gap from May to September in Y7). It was like boot camp and my dd spent it staring out of the window dreaming of escape. She HATED it. She got 120, 118 and 116 in her SATs and I consider shameful evidence to my capitulation as a parent to what amounted to further academic torture after “death by worksheets” during lockdown.

I wish I’d taken her out of school in hindsight. Two weeks. Four weeks. The whole term.

Go. Enjoy life. Enjoy your holiday. Life is too short to worry about 9 days of missed schooling.

JC89 · 29/10/2023 06:53

You do realise you can still go on holiday with your DC when they have left school right? We were going on holidays as a family until I was 27 and my brother was 30! It's not now or never...

Dragonsandcats · 29/10/2023 06:57

@CroccyWoccy contact the school- they often do smaller open mornings as well so i’m sure you could get another chance to look around.

VisionsOfSplendour · 29/10/2023 07:00

JC89 · 29/10/2023 06:53

You do realise you can still go on holiday with your DC when they have left school right? We were going on holidays as a family until I was 27 and my brother was 30! It's not now or never...

Also a bit of a shame for the Y3 child, that's a young age to make a lifetime trip Regardless of missing school and fines I'd wait until they were older to appreciate it and remember if fully

One of my children was that age when we went on a family trip that was a great experience but if asked now all they can't actually remember the trip just the photos of it.

TinyTeacher · 29/10/2023 07:00

Honestly? It's quite a significant chunk of time. But as a one off.... No it won't do harm.

You are quite likely to be fined. Check out the policy.

Take responsibility for making sure your child doesnt fall behind. Make it clear to the school that you are not expecting them to provide work/do marking, but ask in advance what is likely to be covered and make sure you go through that with your child. It's a pain to have to go off the start of a topic again with a child because they turn up near the end and can't follow the class.

TinyTeacher · 29/10/2023 07:02

Oh, and don't grumble if they and up with poor parts for Christmas show etc. The teacher can the expected not to rehearse just because your child isn't there, so that may necessitate them having a small part.

FrodisCapering · 29/10/2023 07:03

As long as you don't expect their teachers to do any work whatsoever to make up for the learning they have lost. That should be on you.

EasterIssland · 29/10/2023 07:06

VisionsOfSplendour · 29/10/2023 07:00

Also a bit of a shame for the Y3 child, that's a young age to make a lifetime trip Regardless of missing school and fines I'd wait until they were older to appreciate it and remember if fully

One of my children was that age when we went on a family trip that was a great experience but if asked now all they can't actually remember the trip just the photos of it.

Show quote history

My son remembers the hols he’s done until now and is much younger than that. Also If it’s for the reason of not remembering , then we’d not do many things for our kids as they’d not remember about it.
also I’d expect a 8yo child to remember things

SpottedHandkerchief · 29/10/2023 07:06

Iloveshoes123 · 28/10/2023 22:50

For Y6 my only worry would be sats but it's early on and if you are happy they could catchup/are ahead I would go for it.
If you are in England you will v likely be fined though - £60 per child per parent.

Haven’t RTFT yet so someone may have already pointed this out, but the fine for unauthorised absences is £60 per child per parent and per day - so £1200 per child for the two weeks for you and DH together

Everydayimhuffling · 29/10/2023 07:07

Ask the Secondary school for a tour. Most will do that any time, but they certainly will to replace Open Evening

EasterIssland · 29/10/2023 07:08

SpottedHandkerchief · 29/10/2023 07:06

Haven’t RTFT yet so someone may have already pointed this out, but the fine for unauthorised absences is £60 per child per parent and per day - so £1200 per child for the two weeks for you and DH together

Show quote history

depeds where you’re but it tends to be not per day but per slot

BethDuttonsTwin · 29/10/2023 07:08

Haven’t RTFT yet so someone may have already pointed this out, but the fine for unauthorised absences is £60 per child per parent and per day - so £1200 per child for the two weeks for you and DH together

No it isn't 🙄

Soontobe60 · 29/10/2023 07:11

Where is this magical place???

Daffodil18 · 29/10/2023 07:11

Yes do it but just factor in the fine. Primary is easy to catch up but secondary school would be hard to keep up after that amount of time off.

Roundtoedshoes · 29/10/2023 07:14

I say do it, but then I’m so surprised (apart from the massive saving that makes these fines you might not even get negligible), that parents have enough holiday leave/other childcare options to cover the already massive amounts of weeks off of school they get!