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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take DC out of school for two weeks for a holiday?

253 replies

CroccyWoccy · 28/10/2023 22:44

Thinking about taking the family on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday next year, but having looked into it, we would have to take the DC out of school for a fortnight to make it work.

They have good attendance record - I have never taken them out for any reason before and they are rarely sick.

I was hoping we could do the holiday only taking them out for 5 days, but it isn’t feasible, to make it work they would need to miss two weeks (though one day is an inset day, so 9 days in total).

Is this too long? Either in terms of lost education or the amount of trouble we’d be in? DC will be Y6 and Y3, holiday would be tacked onto October half term.

OP posts:
Iamnotthe1 · 28/10/2023 23:55

I wouldn't. Your children would have the loss of learning for those two weeks but would also likely find it more difficult to get back into "school mode" after 3 weeks away from the classroom. If it's not financially viable to do it during the holiday time (and won't ever be) then I'd wait a year: missing two weeks of Y4 and Y7 would be less impactful than Y3 and Y6.

Soontobe60 · 28/10/2023 23:57

What is this ‘holiday of a lifetime’ that can’t be taken at any other time?

Soontobe60 · 28/10/2023 23:59

Also, in terms of flights, going mid week before half term and returning mid week after half term will also be cheaper, nd mean less time missed in school.
Im currently on holiday and my flight on Thursday was cheaper than waiting til today.

mn29 · 29/10/2023 00:03

At primary school two weeks really won’t make much difference, especially if attendance is otherwise good. Do it while they’re still young.

Quitelikeacatslife · 29/10/2023 00:11

You will definitely get fined for sure , per parent per child. Also is that not when y6 residential is? And just rude, not even using October half term at all?

UsernameAlreadyTaken101 · 29/10/2023 00:17

mn29 · 29/10/2023 00:03

At primary school two weeks really won’t make much difference, especially if attendance is otherwise good. Do it while they’re still young.

Why do people seem to think primary school is not that important? It's literally the foundation for everything they will learn. Even in the earliest stages, missing two weeks is a huge chunk of time for children to miss. Two weeks equates to 50 hours of learning time, across probably at least 35/40 different lessons. However, if it really was a once in a lifetime opportunity I would probably take it. Well I personally couldn't, as I am a teacher and wouldn't be able to, but I mean I would understand a parent grabbing the opportunity. If it's just a great deal and a money saving exercise then I'd think twice.

BitofaStramash · 29/10/2023 00:24

We've done this most years. Stopped this year as eldest has reached the exam years.

(No fines in Scotland)

Moveoverdarlin · 29/10/2023 00:28

I wouldn’t.

TheBirdintheCave · 29/10/2023 00:29

My parents did this with us every other year. We first went to Florida in early December when I was in Year 6 and my brother in Year 4. No issues came from it. I was still top of my class for SATs come the summer :)

Hope you have a great time! :D

Allcalm · 29/10/2023 01:55

I'm assuming you're going to Australia or something which is impossible to do as a short holiday? You've said it's once in a lifetime SO your choice is take them out of school or you don't go...ever... you just don't ever have this amazing family experience because they'll have to miss a few days of school. No brainer for me (and completely different from doing a week in term time just because its cheaper).

triggeringnometry · 29/10/2023 01:49

You can't put one parent"# name on the fine, like suggested by a previous poster, you don't put any names, the LA can fine anyone with parental responsibility (like step-parents, parents not living together, etc). The parental responsibility in educational terms, is not the same as parental responsibility in legal terms.

Double check that your LA does fine and doesn't default to court proceedings automatically (a few may).

I've taken mine out when in primary, wwmwere fined, but it's easier than in secondary. Don't expect work though, teachers are not expected to provide work, orr spend time covering areas they have missed.

PaperSn0wAGhOst · 29/10/2023 02:01

Do it!
In ten years from now they won’t remember two weeks off school but they will remember an amazing holiday.
Family time is SO important. I will be doing it later this year as I feel like my children’s school didn’t care about the kids missing school during covid so they shouldn’t care now.

JustMarriedBecca · 29/10/2023 02:09

I used to think I never would but, being in a situation where I feel both children are largely ignored academically ("they're both excelling, unfortunately as a school we don't have resources to stretch them appropriately and I don't think you'd find that kind of input available at a private primary either") I completely would. COVID demonstrated that the progression in school in that time period is easily caught up.

It depends on the holiday though and yourself as parents.

Three weeks of engagement with adults, talking, discussing, experiencing different cultures, learning independence and resilience through physical activity and life experiences beyond normal academics - absolutely.

Three weeks all inclusive where you largely ignore the kids and let them crack on in kids club whilst you read a book on a sunbed, probably not.

penpep · 29/10/2023 02:28

Yes do it 🙂

Mum45678 · 29/10/2023 02:37

I’m planning to do this. One in primary, one in high school. Both sides of the my children’s families are in Australia. Both on different sides of Australia. They haven’t seen my family in four years and their dads side in seven years.

There is no way I’m flying in the Summer to spend it freezing cold in Australia. Not to mention, the flight costs are already obscene.

I had a friend who was fined for taking her kids back to Australia to see their Grandad who was dying of cancer. She took them out for a similar length of time. I’d easily say that was way more important than a couple of weeks of school.

Caspianberg · 29/10/2023 05:09

@UsernameAlreadyTaken101 - just because a child isn’t at school for 2 weeks, 50hrs learning isn’t going to necessarily be missed is it. Most children on a 4 week trip ( 2 week holidays, 2 week off school) are going to learn far more than a child at school for 2 weeks then just at home for 2 weeks.

My Ds isn’t school age yet, but we don’t live in uk now and on a recent 3 week trip back he did loads of ‘learning’ in my opinion. From historical, language, arts, sports…

Natsku · 29/10/2023 05:31

I'd do it, if they don't struggle in school. Maybe you can find out from other parents in their classes what the children are learning during that time and spend a bit of time with them each day doing the essentials (like if they are learning a new concept in maths, you teach it to them).
I took my DD out of school for two weeks when she was in 1st grade, thankfully not a problem in my country, so long as you ask permission first, and her lovely teacher set her school work for the two weeks and we took her books with us and she did it while on holiday. If I took her out now I am pretty sure her current teacher would do the same as he does when she's off sick, and send a message saying what work they've been doing each day so she can do it. But its up to the teacher of course whether or not they do that, not something to ask the teacher to do as don't want to give them more work.

FloofCloud · 29/10/2023 05:52

Iloveshoes123 · 28/10/2023 22:50

For Y6 my only worry would be sats but it's early on and if you are happy they could catchup/are ahead I would go for it.
If you are in England you will v likely be fined though - £60 per child per parent.

SATS mean sod all! They're more about the school profile than the child

theunbelievabletruth · 29/10/2023 05:57

Sailawaytocromer · 28/10/2023 23:50

I wouldn’t. I’m pretty shocked by the responses so far. It’s unfair on your children and really disrespectful to their teachers. It makes more work for them.

Cant you go away on a 3 week holiday in the summer?

What a load of old tosh. !

When your kids are in their 20s and out of Uni - left home . It will be the amazing holiday that you will all remember. Not the fact you missed the 'pie chart' topic.

Two weeks is absolutely nothing in the scheme of life. There is much more to education than school.

It will honestly not make ANY difference to their long term employment prospects. Which after all.. is the whole point of the education pathway.

whateveryouwantmetosay · 29/10/2023 05:58

Screw SATs they are BS anyway. Take your holiday and have fun!!

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 29/10/2023 05:58

Good luck getting info out of other parents about what your kids have missed. Mine will rarely divulge what they’re up to.

TeenDivided · 29/10/2023 06:00

FloofCloud · 29/10/2023 05:52

SATS mean sod all! They're more about the school profile than the child

Show quote history

Apart from the fact that government targets for their GCSE grades are set from sats, so falling below target may mean a secondary school targets them for intervention. So lower sats may mean underperformance isn't picked up.

Oh yes and the fact that some schools (not all by any means) do initial setting, or worse, streaming by sats results.

However, y6 and y3 is better than y7 and y4 in my opinion. Y7 sign many subjects will be missed with so many teachers it would be a real pain to catch up.

Decoart · 29/10/2023 06:01

Go for it, we did it with ours and no impact all on educstion.

This time is precious with your children as we are sadly now finding out.

ABCXYZ17 · 29/10/2023 06:03

I wouldn’t personally. I work in education and any missed learning should be avoided. You son missed lots of formal schooling during covid. It isn’t fair on teachers to have to catch them up. 9 missed maths sessions is significant. Pupils do maths every day in primary school. I had the option of a trip in February with friends had to say no as our half terms are different and I would never take my child out of school intentionally.

smartiesneberhadtheanswer · 29/10/2023 06:06

Year 6 is the perfect time to do this as most of the year is wasted studying for SATs