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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not what the GP receptionist to loudly proclaim that I'm overdue for a smear test in the waiting room?

400 replies

nahhh88 · 25/10/2023 12:25

I went into the GP surgery for a completely unrelated manner, and when the GP receptionist pulled up my profile she said I'm overdue for my smear test, and did I want to book in for the smear test. I just said I'll book it another time and tried to get her to stop talking. I've never had a smear test as I'm a virgin and had the HPV vaccines as a teenager, and I have no intention of having one done any time soon.

I felt really embarrassed knowing everyone in the waiting room will have heard (the chairs are all very close to the reception desk, there's no privacy so you end up knowing everyone's private medical details said aloud for everyone to hear. As I walked out this old man made eye contact with me and I just felt really embarrassed by it.

AIBU to think GP receptions need to have more privacy and things handled more quietly and sensitively?

OP posts:
Guttedme · 26/10/2023 22:11

Smear tests I didn’t bother until my late 30’s under the whole not having sex I’m ok, they were unsurprisingly painless at got older. I’ve only had limited smears before the HPV diagnosis.

41 I was a virgin diagnosed with HPV to have yearly smears - if the NHS weren’t making it up.

Please get your smears, nothing is guaranteed through not having sex.

IceCreamSundaeCat · 26/10/2023 22:18

They're honestly not as painful as they used to be. I can understand your feelings around privacy, I was like that myself but you tend to develop dontgiveashititis as you get older.

Spatulas should be disposable plastic ones nowadays and it's quick and relatively painless, ask for the narrow size. It's a good thing to have done.

NoDought · 26/10/2023 22:24

Yes, can be passed on through skin to skin contact and touch, therefore although low risk, virgins should still have their smear. Also the hpv vaccines only protect against certain strains and there are many strains of high risk hpv.

Mamanyt · 26/10/2023 23:16

Don't know what rules apply in GB, but in the US, it would be illegal to disclosse ANY medical information where others could hear it, although that gets a bit lax in hospitals where a room is shared.

HOWEVER, I do want to make you aware that my son's first girlfriend had cervical cancer at the age of 13, when she was still a virgin. Get that swab.

Sunshineandchill · 26/10/2023 23:21

no, it annoys me that they even know our personal information. I really hope they keep it confidential!

threatmatrix · 26/10/2023 23:26

Any questions etc asked by the receptionist is answered with ‘ what medical degree have you got’

Owl55 · 26/10/2023 23:34

You have a point whether it’s a smear or something intimate why should anyone in the waiting area hear it discussed.

MissBattleaxe · 26/10/2023 23:34

Can we please stop dissing GP receptionists? We are trained in care navigation so the right people get the right appointments. For example: people with toothache who want antibiotics will be given the emergency dentist number. People with ankle injuries will be sent to MIU etc. We are trained to do this and most of us are treated like shit by the public. The GPs tell us to do this. We don't just make it up.

MissBattleaxe · 26/10/2023 23:37

@Sunshineandchill receptionists cannot do their job if all medical info was a secret. We are also bound by strict confidentiality. It's a really hard job yet we're less popular than traffic wardens.

Eve223 · 26/10/2023 23:45

MissBattleaxe · 26/10/2023 23:34

Can we please stop dissing GP receptionists? We are trained in care navigation so the right people get the right appointments. For example: people with toothache who want antibiotics will be given the emergency dentist number. People with ankle injuries will be sent to MIU etc. We are trained to do this and most of us are treated like shit by the public. The GPs tell us to do this. We don't just make it up.

Why are the majority of you rude to people who are polite to you?

Why do some of you enjoy loudly belittling and embarrassing patients at reception?

Why do you share confidential patient information with your friends and family?

Do you enjoy the power you have over patients?

I'm afraid your reputation is often well deserved.

MissBattleaxe · 26/10/2023 23:52

You don't know me or my colleagues or the great feedback we get . You are judging me on your own experience based on a small sample. My colleagues and I are friendly, helpful and go above and beyond to help patients. In return we deal with daily abuse and threats. If we were on a power trip this is the last job on earth I would do.

MissBattleaxe · 26/10/2023 23:54

@Eve223 I don't do any of the things you list. How offensive of you.

RedoneP · 27/10/2023 00:25

The GP should have spoken to you about this in your appointment. However, some GP's do palm this off on receptionists. Also, surgeries have to gain QOF points and funding from the health authority and believe it or not, have targets to meet in terms of smears, blood pressures etc. However, you should receive a letter inviting you and if you want not to receive them or be asked in future, get a note put on you GP notes that you decline them to avoid this situation again. To be fair, I can see that if they didn't prompt you, if supposing you did develop cervical problems in future, they may be held responsible or blamed if you complained you'd not been invited for a smear. It's a tricky one. I don't think it's unreasonable to prefer discretion, however, I think how much it's upset you is a bit OTT. Forget it and don't take it to heart.

Darkdaysdislike · 27/10/2023 00:29

Sweetpeasaremadeforbees · 25/10/2023 12:42

You still need a smear test if you are a virgin, although your risk of cervical cancer will be lower.

Is that right? The smear test only (initially) tests for the presence of HPV so if the OP hasn't had sexual contact how would she have caught HPV? Plus if she's had the HPV vaccine she'll be largely protected.

You are completely right sweetpeas no need at all currently

Jumpingthruhoops · 27/10/2023 02:35

EmmaEmerald · 25/10/2023 12:53

OP yes, the lack of discretion in the pharmacy also bugs me

please look into smear tests, they are part of a huge industry now and many women are starting to realise they are not "necessary", it is your choice to have one or not.

I think GPs still get a financial incentive for each one. Meanwhile, no one is hassling men in the same way, although I think that's starting to change.

Agree wholeheartedly with this! One of the reasons I stopped having them.

Catsmere · 27/10/2023 02:56

Don't let anyone browbeat you into having it, OP. First one I had, over 30 years ago, was because the bitch of a doctor didn't believe I was a virgin and wouldn't prescribe the Pill without it. It was excruciatingly painful, even when she used an instrument she claimed she regularly used on a child who was being abused by her father. (Her comment afterward: "I didn't think any woman would be a virgin at your age in this country!" I was the advanced age of 25.)

Jumpingthruhoops · 27/10/2023 03:00

RosesAndHellebores · 25/10/2023 14:19

@nahhh88 I am sorry you have got such a hard time on this thread.

I agree with you that the receptionist should have been more discreet. Information relating to your personal data was discussed loudly and publicly. That is unacceptable.

Many years ago a receptionist at my then practice boomed across the waiting room, "your smears overdue, do you want to book it?". It was inappropriate and she should have asked me quietly when I checked in. The only other person in the waiting room happened to be dd's deputy headmaster!

My answer was no I didn't wish to book it, she was told to be mindful of my private medical matters in future and I complained to the GP during my appointment. The GP was not impressed.

FWIW every woman has the right to decide whether they wish to have a smear test or not. No should suffice. I've just had the conversation over the phone with a caller from my practice this morning. I asked who did them and was told the nurses. I declined on the basis of previous experience and was told our nurses are lovely and really good. I reiterated the answer was no. I was asked if I was sure. I reiterated "no". Women are allowed to say no without an inquisition. If I feel I want a smear test, I'll arrange a well woman appointment with a suitably qualified gynaecologist. Interestingly when a gynaecologist has taken the smear: it has never hurt, it has never been inadequate and led to a recall and there has never been any blood. Neither have there been any inappropriate or insensitive comments.

It costs about £400 - worth every penny for expertise and dignity.

Same here. I was put off going for smears after an horrendous experience at the hands of two very inept nurses at my surgery. Was referred to the hospital clinic where the gynaecologist carried out the procedure in minutes. Barely felt him do it.

Haven't had another, though, for several years as, like a PP said, I have looked at the stats, assessed my own risk and don't believe they're wholly necessary.

roseheartfly · 27/10/2023 06:00

She might have just saved your life.

Women have smears.

We all poo, fart and wee.

Grow up the woman is doing her job and clearly a decent one too.

IrresponsiblyCertainAboutSexualDimorphism · 27/10/2023 07:21

roseheartfly · 27/10/2023 06:00

She might have just saved your life.

Women have smears.

We all poo, fart and wee.

Grow up the woman is doing her job and clearly a decent one too.

Sharing sensitive personal information where it can be heard in the waiting room is not appropriate.

RosesAndHellebores · 27/10/2023 07:26

@roseheartfly of course we all poo, fart and wee. We don't however tend to discuss them loudly with strangers on an unsolicited basis. Most of us keep them quite private.

Riola · 27/10/2023 07:43

HoldOnMiGenna · 25/10/2023 14:48

Bloody hell, the amount of obtuse duncebats on this thread!
The point isn't that the OP was embarrassed....that was just an outcome of the fact that the receptionist was less than discreet about the OP's medical status!
Women falling over themselves to gaslight the OP just because they see the words " smear test", " virgin" and " embarrassed" , whilst ignoring the words " shouting" and " receptionist" is not cool.
And virgins who have the HPV vaccine do not ordinarily have to have smear tests, either.
So please stop associating the OP's virginal status with having the right to think that she is some cloistered woman who needs patronising by us non virgins who obviously must be more worldly because of our non virginal status.
The misogyny is off the charts on this thread.
OP. Write to the practice manager about this woman's lack of inside voice.

This.

RosesAndHellebores · 27/10/2023 08:31

@MissBattleaxe you and your colleagues may be lovely but I have moved about a bit and dealt with many surgeries. Regrettably my experiences align more closely with those of a previous poster.

Here in the South the minimum wage paid by most GP's does not attract the best candidates on the whole and there often are significant communication and boundary issues. Probably not the receptionists' fault but I question if many should be in a public facing role. There is often a real issue with their listening and hearing and jumping to conclusions.

I appreciate the issue is a GP issue. Receptionists follow their instructions and the GP then often undermines them when speaking privately to the patient. GP's, self employed small businesses, procuring services on the cheap have much to answer for imo.

MissBattleaxe · 27/10/2023 08:54

OK, well I'm in Wales and that's not my experience at all, on both sides of the counter. I'm on a small wage despite being a graduate. I found it nigh on impossible to get a job after taking a career break to raise the children. Some people are on minimum wage through no fault of their own. My surgery has won awards so maybe we are the exception. It's very sad if we are. Everyone deserves compassion, respect and privacy at the counter. Looks like many receptionists are giving us a bad name. Not all of us deserve it.

FWIW The overdue smear message does pop up on screen, but it's not our place to mention it. That would happen in a private consultation with a nurse or doctor.

DerekFaker · 27/10/2023 08:58

roseheartfly · 27/10/2023 06:00

She might have just saved your life.

Women have smears.

We all poo, fart and wee.

Grow up the woman is doing her job and clearly a decent one too.

Are you a GP's receptionist, by any chance?

Sunshineandchill · 27/10/2023 09:50

Do doctors have to sit in a waiting room and have their private information called out? Just wondered…..