To counterfeit my daughters Christmas presents?

[Wazzitnow]

OK, so she's into some obscure person ATM. Shes autistic and her people of interest changes bi yearly.

Right now it's this person who has a clothing range that is only available in the USA and is crazy expensive. $100 for a hoodie "$40 for a Tshirt type thing.

She's never seen his merch in real life and it's really cheap iron on kind of stuff.

And his inside label tag is very simple.

I have a printing machine and could very easily forge the items and make the label for inside the collar too.

I don't want to spend that much money on some obscure Tshirt with 1 word on just for the label.

But in true autistic teen style this is all she wants.

I'd get charged import fees too.

It's unlikely she would ever know because ei doubt she will ever come across a real piece of merch from him

And the style he has along with the label he has means it would be super easy to make and there would really be no way for her to know.

I wouldn't be selling them obviously. Just a few items, couple of Tshirts and a hoodie for her.

Would be around £35 quid instead of £200+!

And I know she won't be into him by summer either which makes me even more reluctant.

Exactly. Just tell her no. You're not paying hundreds for these clothes.

PP's make a good point @Wazzitnow , what if she posts a pic of the item somewhere and others spot it's not real?

I also think it's a good idea to tell her that you can't afford certain things- that's a good life lesson.

You could tell her you have a budget of X amount (including shipping costs.)

You could even point out to her that her interests change, and if she's still into X in 6 months she could have one of those items.

Absolutely do it!

My DCs are very off the beaten track with their likes, one being assessed for autism ( makes absolute sense if she is), I’ve always created specific stuff for them as a joint project or bought of sites like Aliexpress for surprise gifts. if I had a printing machine or anything that would help me design and print certain things I’d be in heaven, as just doing it for my DCs would make up the overall costs involved.

give her a copy before Christmas and see how it perceived, she might change her mind

♥️ I didn’t think of that, it makes sense. I like how you dealt with feeling outside the group. I always felt like that, due to abuse by my father.

What you say is a reminder that most people if not all have struggles and so have coping mechanisms that help them get through.

Yes, it's a hard way to feel. Sorry you felt that way and had to experience abuse.

I wouldn't say my way of dealing was necessarily healthy. It involved choosing to be so different that I pushed everyone away as a teen. If you reject everyone first, you can't be rejected, right? . As a parent it meant being part of parenting groups where other parents were also different and outside the box. That's not necessarily bad though. It was right for us.

I don't know if OP's daughter's classmates are into the same thing. If they are, I know my classmates would have picked up a fake a mile away and I'd never have heard the end of it. Years later it would still be bought up. Totally stole the joy.

I'd do it in a heartbeat.

It's not lying to say "here's the shirt you wanted." The manufacturer is irrelevant if it looks like the design she had in mind.
We aren't talking a fake Picasso FFS.

That's fantastic! Far superior to mass produced crap.

I’m a little surprised by the answers I’ve read so far. If my parents had done this when I was younger (or now for that matter - imagine a really good fake Louis Vuitton or whatever), I would feel so betrayed if I ever found out. I don’t think you can guarantee that you won’t somehow be discovered even if you think you’re being careful, so it’s too much of a risk. In addition, I think it’s kind of a disrespectful thing to do someone — albeit with the very very best and understandable of intentions. So, while I totally get why you’re considering it, I think you should go a different route.

Would you break into a shop and steal the desired items if you knew you would get away with it?
What you are suggesting is no different. This is someone else's work, however ‘simple’ you may deem it to be.

I have two autistic DDs. Neither are adverse to a fake as long as it looks convincing. If this was me, I would just be completely honest.

“hey DD, you do realise that if I get you the clothes you want from America it will cost X much and that’s all you’ll get for Xmas? It would be really easy for me to make one that looks exactly the same, no one would ever know it wasn’t the real thing and then you’d have lots of your Christmas budget left for other stuff? Do you want me to give it a try and see what you think, if you’re not happy with it and you really the real thing from America then we can do that but this might be a better option, otherwise Christmas will look a bit empty for you and all you’ll have is a t-shirt”.

If she agrees then I’d get on and do it asap, and not take it out of her Christmas budget if she’s happy with it, because £35 isn’t crazy for a top any time of the year.

DS is into RPG and was at a convention to promote his game, and another game designer said to not worry too much about the game, the merch was the money maker. He pays (cant remember the details so lets say...) £1 per t-shirt and sells them for £20 each and so on with hoodies, phone cases etc and that the people who bought it were stupid so it was their problem.

Make it yourself, the influencer she is following probably did.

For many, many years my autistic DS only had one true love: Percy, the little green engine from Thomas the Tank Engine.

This was fine while he was little but as he got older, he could no longer fit into the t-shirts etc. Thomas the Tank Engine is aimed at younger children so they don’t have merchandise for 13yr olds!

I also have the ability to create my own versions and that’s exactly what we did. He wouldn’t have been able to understand why it wasn’t available in his size and honestly, anything with Percy on made him unbelievably happy!!

I think for special prized items that will last through the years then buy the original. But if not available or a passing fad, then make your own. Parents have always done this (to varying degrees of success!) and providing you don’t advertise or sell your makes, then the impact on the original seller will be negligible.

Not at all.

I couldn't do what OP is suggesting. I see all the logical reasons, and that it comes from a good place, but the idea that I'd be able to look at her excitedly opening what she believes is a genuine gift (regardless of how basic the genuine one actually is) and know I'd lied, is unfathomable.

I would however have a clear conversation about why getting the originals is problematic, not worth the money, the implications (can't get other stuff she might like etc)

Deceiving her feels very wrong.

That's a ridiculous thing to do. It would be manifestly obvious it wasn't the genuine t-shirt.

Why do it? Buy the genuine one OR the non-branded one. Both valid choices. Don't create a rubbish fake

This is really sweet. I'm so glad you were able to do this for your DS.

In OP's case (I realise she's hidden the thread now!) I've no issue with creating the copy; it's about the possible impact on her DD and the act of lying to her, which I don't think is right.

It's unlikely she would ever know because ei doubt she will ever come across a real piece of merch from him

Would she be really upset if she knew you'd lied to her?

I have a teen daughter here - and she would be very upset if I'd lied to her. I wouldn't just for that reason. Be honest about why you're not getting it.

Life has disappointments.

I buy my autistic dd trendy items that I would not normally buy because it is absolutely a mechanism for her to integrate into social groups. She approaches friendship somewhat analytically and has managed to recognize that shared symbols can be part of the formula.

I probably would not fake merchandise despite the fact that I easily could. I have supplies to make just about anything. I’m not too worried about someone not getting the profits from exploiting someone making a tshirt in Asia. I’d mainly be worried that someone would spot my fake and my daughter would have to deal with the fallout. The whole point is to help her blend in.

Make the replica, but tell her it's a replica because you're unable to get/afford the original

Don't lie. If she ever found out, she'd never trust you again

Absolutely do it, I would. You’re not selling it, it’s a private gift, and I speak as someone who’s work has been copied and sold, which is totally different.

I wouldn't.

I'd simply tell your daughter that it's too expensive for a hoodie and that she needs to pick another gift!

Why you asking if you are going to do it anyway?

All I get from this thread is that Autistic Children get what they want.

We had fake everything when I was growing up. Eg Girls World was a Fashion Head

i was always happy but knew they were fake- we just couldn’t afford it

Yes you are being unreasonable to counterfeit your daughter's Christmas presents although you seem to have already made your mind up so why ask? I think there's a strong chance she'll know. Just say no! Sorry, can't afford it right now.

I think this would be what would stop me, tbh. My autistic daughter would feel so betrayed if she ever found out. I'm not sure she'd ever fully trust me again.