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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to change sons name he is 16 months

67 replies

rommy36 · 22/10/2023 04:30

We really struggled finding a name. We finally named him 2months or so after her was born. It was the name we thought we liked the best but still weren't crazy.
Up to a year i was adamant i was going to change it. Then something happened i came round to it.
Now i don't like it again.
Every soft play or park we go to we hear it.
Its a nice name just does fit him or feel right and i don't like the possible nicknames.

Is it scarring to do this?

The main problem is i don't have an alternative. Lol i've probably lost you all after that comment.

Anyone else been in this predicament?

OP posts:
Vexxa · 22/10/2023 04:59

I'm sorry, but at 16 months I think it's too late. He will likely know his name by now and it would be confusing for him. I think you need to work on coming to terms with the name.

whosaidtha · 22/10/2023 05:13

Unless it's something really ridiculous then I think it's too late. He will know his name by now and you won't get a new birth certificate now he's over 1 so more annoying paper work when he wants a bank, to get married etc.

Redglitter · 22/10/2023 05:14

You can't change it. The wee soul will be totally confused. At 16 months he knows his name, you can't expect him to suddenly recognise a new name.

You're going to have to get used to it.

fearfuloffluff · 22/10/2023 05:14

Stick with it.

HelenTudorFisk · 22/10/2023 05:17

They most ridiculous thing about this suggestion is that you don’t even know what you’d change it to!

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 22/10/2023 05:25

No. You can’t change it now.

What’s the name?

Shoxfordian · 22/10/2023 05:27

Not really fair to change it now; maybe there’s a nickname or a shortened version you can use

Are you always so indecisive?

junbean · 22/10/2023 05:27

Of course you can. It's not scarring. He'll figure it out. I have a 16mo and she understands most of what we say. I've thought about changing her name too, just mostly self doubt though, no real reason. She actually has one first name and two middles- and she responds to all 3! Plus her nicknames. If I did change it she'd just roll with it.

Many people wait quite awhile to name their child so they can find one that fits. I also know of a Native American tribe (Hopi) that gives their children multiple names, each given by an auntie and based on nature's signs when they were born. They also have a legal English name. Some have parents of two different tribes so they also get a name from the other tribe. None of them are scarred by being called different names by different people. They each have a story about how they got their names and what they mean. Your son will have a story too though it will probably be more humorous and less spiritual lol.

Don't worry about it just go with what suits him!

MrsTerryPratchett · 22/10/2023 05:28

HelenTudorFisk · 22/10/2023 05:17

They most ridiculous thing about this suggestion is that you don’t even know what you’d change it to!

It is.

Poor little boy knows his name!

GreenWheat · 22/10/2023 06:15

How are you going to change it if you don't know what you want to change it to? Far too late now plus what's to say you won't change your mind again next year if you're so indecisive?

Nopenoway · 22/10/2023 06:20

Did you get fined for the delay in registering his birth?

happylittlesloth · 22/10/2023 06:23

Nopenoway · 22/10/2023 06:20

Did you get fined for the delay in registering his birth?

They suspended that due to covid I'm not sure if it was back in place 16m ago. Might have been.

happylittlesloth · 22/10/2023 06:24

Yabu

GoodVibesHere · 22/10/2023 06:28

You can get away with changing a cat's name, especially if you choose a similar-sounding or rhyming name. But he's not a cat, he's a real little boy so please don't do that to him.

ChildrenOfTheQuorn · 22/10/2023 13:12

I disagree, I 100% think you can change it at this point and he won't even remember it was ever anything else. However as you don't know what you'd change it to, I think you just need to leave it...

NutellaNut · 22/10/2023 21:26

You can change it if you really want to, he’ll be too young to remember. But since you don’t know what to change it too, it seems rather strange. You’d be better off getting used to the name yourself and learn to love it. What’s the alternative if you don’t have another name to call him. He can’t go around being nameless!

yogasaurus · 22/10/2023 21:29

No, that’s his name now.

Ruminating over naming a child can be linked to PND. Might be worth talking to you GP.

TeeedleDum · 22/10/2023 21:29

Honestly it's too late, you can give him a family pet name if it bothers you that much x

Gnomegnomegnome · 22/10/2023 21:32

Does he have a middle name?

Gwendimarco · 22/10/2023 21:33

When you finally know what you want to call him, you can introduce that as a pet name. However, he keeps his official name.

ConnieTucker · 22/10/2023 21:33

He isnt a toy. You cannot just chage his name when you get bored of it.

The name clearly isnt the issue. what else is going on?

Vinoveritass · 22/10/2023 21:35

Can you start using his middle name or another nickname and see if that sticks?

CowboyJoanna · 22/10/2023 21:38

YABVVVVVU.
He will know that's his name now. Your relatives will also know him as this name. It's on his birth certificate.

Every night before you put him in his cot, you cuddled him and said goodnight NAME.

When he took his first steps and began babbling his first words, you cheered yaaay clever boy NAME!

He's already had his first birthday. As he grabbed a fistful of his cake and stuffed it into his cheeks, you all sang happy birthday dear NAME

Daisybuttercup12345 · 22/10/2023 21:42

CowboyJoanna · 22/10/2023 21:38

YABVVVVVU.
He will know that's his name now. Your relatives will also know him as this name. It's on his birth certificate.

Every night before you put him in his cot, you cuddled him and said goodnight NAME.

When he took his first steps and began babbling his first words, you cheered yaaay clever boy NAME!

He's already had his first birthday. As he grabbed a fistful of his cake and stuffed it into his cheeks, you all sang happy birthday dear NAME

This.
He is a person in his own right with his own name.
You are being ridiculous.

amiboverd · 22/10/2023 21:43

I think YABU just accept this it's name especially if you don't have an alternative. I think it would be weird to change his name now (for him and everyone else)