To think a Solicitor shouldn't be allowed to do this?

Moonlightbythesea · 2023-10-21T05:18:31+00:00

I can't go into all the ins and outs as I don't want to out myself potentially. I'm involved in Court proceedings regarding unpaid child maintenance. Ex has a Solicitor acting for him, I can't afford to have one represent me, although hopefully I will be ok by myself. As part of my case I've received paperwork, copied from the Court to both parties, and I'm truly aghast at how his Solicitor has slated me in a couple of her letters. She has made a few points about me not being very 'stable mentally', words to that affect anyway. She doesn't know me, and besides. I guess she's just writing what my ex tells her to. Can a Solicitor do this? I thought Solicitors had to abide by a code of conduct, or as it's Court proceedings, is there such a thing as litigation privilege where Solicitors can get away with writing all manner of derogatory words and they can't be classed as defamatory?

Whattodo112222 · 21/10/2023 06:21

Solicitors are paid to say and do exactly as the client instructs. I got told I'm hostile, abusive and I'm causing my daughter emotional damage in letters before. If it bothers you then you can write back to correct her.
You need to develop a thicker skin.

evrey · 21/10/2023 06:26

All information passed to the judge will have to be factual not opinion based nor third hand. The solicitor risks looking very unprofessional unless he or she can back this up with proof .
Personally I would write my own cover letter to the judge stating facts only and be respectful to your ex partner .

MyDogCalledMax · 21/10/2023 06:29

Hey OP, solicitor here (albeit not family!)

Solicitors follow the instructions of their client. If that’s what he has told them, that is what they will write, within reason. They are being paid by their client to try and win so their aim is clearly to make you look as bad as possible.
They may well have questioned their client whether such strong language be used in the letter but if it’s what the client wants, then it’s what they do.

sparklefresh · 21/10/2023 06:33

If it helps, she probably toned down the language as much as her client would let her, but ultimately she's acting on her client's instructions. A judge won't be swayed by that language though.

Original poster

Moonlightbythesea · 21/10/2023 06:46

Thanks all, I can't see the point then of the other party paying someone to write what they tell them to, when they could just write to the Court and represent themselves!

I guess it boils down to the belief that the Judge will listen to a Solicitor more.

OP posts:

MyDogCalledMax · 21/10/2023 06:50

@Moonlightbythesea there are a lot of reasons for using solicitors. I don’t know if I would agree that the judge would listen more just because a solicitor is involved. Usually, people representing themselves get A LOT more leeway because they’re not expected to know as much about the process. I have seen judges be pretty helpful in that regard, although that is largely down to the personality of the judge!!

bonzaitree · 21/10/2023 06:52

Moonlightbythesea · 21/10/2023 06:46

Thanks all, I can't see the point then of the other party paying someone to write what they tell them to, when they could just write to the Court and represent themselves!

I guess it boils down to the belief that the Judge will listen to a Solicitor more.

The judges job is to listen to both sides.

If the solicitor says in court that you’re mentally unstable. You calmly say that you’re not and that there is no evidence of that.

The judge will be very very used to hearing allegations of someone being unstable etc. They will look at the evidence they’re presented with.

Graciebobcat · 21/10/2023 06:54

Depends how it is written.

Oaktree1233 · 21/10/2023 07:00

A solicitor is paid to present their clients version of events but it makes not a jot of difference unless they can evidence it for the judge. They have to produce proof. In day to day litigation it’s often the case that one sides versions conflict with another’s ( that is why there is a dispute) but that fine as long as the lawyer believes in their clients version. So I could assert that my client could not walk without pain but if the other side had clear contradictory video evidence I would have to tell client to change their evidence or I would not act. I was never a family lawyer but I’m unclear why your mental stability is relevant to unpaid monies. It would be relevant to custody but presumably that’s already determined.

Stringervest · 21/10/2023 07:03

Also a solicitor, but not a family lawyer.

Solicitors are NOT supposed to just write what their client tells them. They shouldn't make statements of fact that they do not know to be true / are not supported by evidence. Stating that someone is unstable without evidence is not professional in my view and would not be regarded well by a judge. I might write "my client believes that [ex] is unstable" but that is a very different thing.

However as pp have said, although the solicitor may be unprofessional, don't let it worry you as a judge won't pay any attention to a statement like that. It could even play in your favour. I once heard a speech from a High Court judge who said they checked the correspondence file at the outset of the trial to decide which party's lawyers they could trust.

Original poster

Moonlightbythesea · 21/10/2023 07:09

MyDogCalledMax · 21/10/2023 06:50

@Moonlightbythesea there are a lot of reasons for using solicitors. I don’t know if I would agree that the judge would listen more just because a solicitor is involved. Usually, people representing themselves get A LOT more leeway because they’re not expected to know as much about the process. I have seen judges be pretty helpful in that regard, although that is largely down to the personality of the judge!!

I hope I get the right Judge!

OP posts:

Original poster

Moonlightbythesea · 21/10/2023 07:10

Graciebobcat · 21/10/2023 06:54

Depends how it is written.

It's extremely derogatory about me. I'm not upset by it, just angry that a Solicitor could write such drivel, even when instructed to do so.

OP posts:

Oaktree1233 · 21/10/2023 07:10

He’s spending his money on lawyers and you are spending money on feeding and clothing the children might be the point to make.

Original poster

Moonlightbythesea · 21/10/2023 07:12

Oaktree1233 · 21/10/2023 07:00

A solicitor is paid to present their clients version of events but it makes not a jot of difference unless they can evidence it for the judge. They have to produce proof. In day to day litigation it’s often the case that one sides versions conflict with another’s ( that is why there is a dispute) but that fine as long as the lawyer believes in their clients version. So I could assert that my client could not walk without pain but if the other side had clear contradictory video evidence I would have to tell client to change their evidence or I would not act. I was never a family lawyer but I’m unclear why your mental stability is relevant to unpaid monies. It would be relevant to custody but presumably that’s already determined.

Edited

My kids are older now, so custody isn't an issue. I agree that there's no relevance at all to my supposed mental health and the fact the other party has not paid what he should have.

OP posts:

MattDamon · 21/10/2023 07:15

The opposing solicitor in a case I was involved with lied so many times (about filing paperwork, receiving/sending letters, the actual content of the case, all easily disproved) that the judge spent a good 5 minutes at our CMD yelling at her for lying. But nothing was done about it. No punishment at all.

I asked our barrister about making a professional complaint (her lies cost extra time and money to disapprove) and he said not to bother, the SRA wouldn't do anything about it. It was so disheartening to hear.

MyGooseisTotallyLoose · 21/10/2023 07:15

Oaktree1233 · 21/10/2023 07:10

He’s spending his money on lawyers and you are spending money on feeding and clothing the children might be the point to make.

This, unless you are saying 'give me 60% of your income to fund me for spousal income', why on earth would he rather pay a lawyer than give money to his children!

Original poster

Moonlightbythesea · 21/10/2023 07:17

Stringervest · 21/10/2023 07:03

Also a solicitor, but not a family lawyer.

Solicitors are NOT supposed to just write what their client tells them. They shouldn't make statements of fact that they do not know to be true / are not supported by evidence. Stating that someone is unstable without evidence is not professional in my view and would not be regarded well by a judge. I might write "my client believes that [ex] is unstable" but that is a very different thing.

However as pp have said, although the solicitor may be unprofessional, don't let it worry you as a judge won't pay any attention to a statement like that. It could even play in your favour. I once heard a speech from a High Court judge who said they checked the correspondence file at the outset of the trial to decide which party's lawyers they could trust.

She has mostly written it as "Mr XXXXX believes that moonlightbythesea is unstable" , but then has also written "I believe moonlightbythesea is unstable" , words to these affects, but she slipped up by writing as though it's her opinion too.

OP posts:

Reugny · 21/10/2023 07:19

I'm another one who doesn't understand how your mental instability can be linked to him not paying maintenance for your joint children.

His own mental instability could be an excuse it could easily effect his income.

The judge will likely ignore it as it isn't relevant plus if you go into the court room and act calmly, you will have proved they are talking shit.

Theunamedcat · 21/10/2023 07:20

So your mentally unstable but he has left your children in your care and custody for years? (I'm assuming years if it's got to court for child maintenance)

Your mentally unstable and that prevents him from paying for his child how?

Your mentally unstable and his response is to apply financial pressure by not paying?

Your mentally unstable and his choice isn't to raise his children himself so they are safe and secure its to financially abuse you by withholding monies meant to help raise the children?

lazysundaymorningcoffee · 21/10/2023 07:20

I'm a lawyer and I think that's appalling if there isn't a medical report to support that. There were much better ways the solicitors could have inferred something to that effect without stating that to be a fact.

Personally I'd complain to the SRA and they will look into that.

SquishyGloopyBum · 21/10/2023 07:20

When you are there be very calm and professional. The same with all your written stuff- be factual and to the point. It will look better.

If it comes up, calmly say that you aren't mentally unstable as alleged, there is no evidence of this and in any case, it's irrelevant to these proceedings.

TigersTea · 21/10/2023 07:22

Theunamedcat · 21/10/2023 07:20

So your mentally unstable but he has left your children in your care and custody for years? (I'm assuming years if it's got to court for child maintenance)

Your mentally unstable and that prevents him from paying for his child how?

Your mentally unstable and his response is to apply financial pressure by not paying?

Your mentally unstable and his choice isn't to raise his children himself so they are safe and secure its to financially abuse you by withholding monies meant to help raise the children?

Perfect response

Reugny · 21/10/2023 07:27

lazysundaymorningcoffee · 21/10/2023 07:20

I'm a lawyer and I think that's appalling if there isn't a medical report to support that. There were much better ways the solicitors could have inferred something to that effect without stating that to be a fact.

Personally I'd complain to the SRA and they will look into that.

Family court cases are full of this shit. Some of the lawyers I know and have met refuse to go anywhere family law because of it.

Original poster

Moonlightbythesea · 21/10/2023 07:28

MattDamon · 21/10/2023 07:15

The opposing solicitor in a case I was involved with lied so many times (about filing paperwork, receiving/sending letters, the actual content of the case, all easily disproved) that the judge spent a good 5 minutes at our CMD yelling at her for lying. But nothing was done about it. No punishment at all.

I asked our barrister about making a professional complaint (her lies cost extra time and money to disapprove) and he said not to bother, the SRA wouldn't do anything about it. It was so disheartening to hear.

That's disgraceful!
It makes you wonder how some people get away with their lies.

OP posts:

Original poster

Moonlightbythesea · 21/10/2023 07:29

Reugny · 21/10/2023 07:27

Family court cases are full of this shit. Some of the lawyers I know and have met refuse to go anywhere family law because of it.

Show quote history

It's a Tribunal Court

OP posts: