Those cool, messy, usually wealthy mums

[Shessodowntoearth]

I want to be one 😅
Does anyone know the type?
Usually quite a few kids, at least two, kids are lovely, but generally quite messy/put together in a kooky way.
Houses are beautiful, but messy/disorganised, beautiful pieces everywhere/decoration but with a lived in/messy vibe. The mums are the same, usually seem quite disorganised but chilled out at the same time, generally away somewhere every school holidays and don’t work.
I know quite a few mums like this near me and wonder what this life is like, mainly the having more money. I’d love to be as laid back if people come around, to not care about the mess as the house is so incredible, to not worry if my kids clothes look scruffy in a cool way and to be comfortable in myself. Is this what happens when you come from money?

Used to have one as a school mum. Poor kids turned up looking scruffy ( had to redress one from lost property for school photo) She’d turn up at random times to collect them, anything from 20-60 minutes late. Poor kid one day looked quite upset mum was the last to arrive and blurted out it was because she was having her legs waxed. Kids were lovely, I’m sure she was a nice person but please don’t leave your 7 year old the last in school week after week. Local doctor’s wife, private school.

I'd never heard of Fabulosa till a couple of months ago when I bought it in Lidl as a one off because they were out of the own brand stuff. DH enthused about it because it was very good at degreasing. Apparently. The bicarb in it made the difference.

I vacuum the skirting boards (and the walls - cobwebs) occasionally but they get actually cleaned once in a blue moon.

I freak out if my kids hair is messy. Genuinely, it really upsets me. That and dust and clutter. The being indifferent to what others think is what makes the boho bunch seem cool. It's not really just money, its ingrained. Some people are naturally quirky, boho and scruffy. For others, it is an affectation started by rock star types in the 70's onward to copy those sort of quirky types as a reaction against the traditional, smart, middle class. Then others have followed suit because it's trendy (like you'd like to OP!😉) The boys from the boho middle class can be reliably and regularly spotted terrorising other children or breaking something at your local National Trust property or gastro pub-with-a-play-area. Their uniform is: something holey and stripey, matted brown, wavy hair and filthy, overgrown nails. They are always called something like Jonty or Rufus. And as someone said upthread, the uniform for the girls is a tutu and wellies, and preferably not a matching pair😁

I've only heard of Fabulosa on Mumsnet. Has Mumsnet moved on from the Zoflora obsession of yesteryear.

I hate scented cleaning products so I'm probably not their target market.

I was behind exactly the mum and DC you describe in York last week. The DD looked like her hair hadn't been brushed in days and all were wearing subtly expensive creased clothes. If I'd taken my DC out like that when they were younger, I'd have been worried someone would call SS.

They make a terrible cup of tea because the goats milk is usually off (as is everything else in the fridge). Is goats milk ever nice though, even when it’s fresh?
I pet sit for a couple of mums like this. Open their fridges. I double dog dare you. 🤮

In fairness, the rotting food is all French and fabulous… but off.

Absolutely pissing myself at the 'Chorlton mums' I grew up in chorlton - it was like this 30 yrs ago and still is now. I now live in a relatively close spa town in a big old Edwardian house. There are elements of the original OP but it's mainly complete laziness coupled with hugely demanding jobs. I do ocado and I have a cleaner who is more like a house organiser. House is freezing though and there's rather alot of gin scattered around. Oh shit. I've turned into a Chorlton Mum.

It’s disgusting.

I can’t actually believe I’m reading that these women want to be slobs.

Mine too. All used regularly, never dusted.

I own a two bedroom condo and live with my ds who has sn's. I don't have money but I have a beautiful, clean, and (in my opinion) a beautifully decorated place.

I don't like clutter and mess. I've known rich people who live both ways. I grew up poor but my mom made sure our home was nice, pretty, and clean.

If messy is a cool rich person thing, I'm happy being middle class and tidy.

You write a lot. About yourself. I think people are teasing you for the way you wrote about yourself. It is caricatured. The cuddly chap in the pub? One who smells deliciously of warm Malbec and damp waxed jacket… (I may have embellished).

I live a mad lifestyle between zone 1 and a hill farm. I have a scrubbed table. My hair is lot quite ask isteous as

I relate to this stereotype- I’m messy, my kids are messy and I’ve always let them wear what they want. the house isn’t organized but we have a cleaner so it’s not too bad.

i do work and there is only an ordinary house though! Maybe it’s more of a personality type. Like I don’t think good parenting is about have brushed hair and clean floors.

They come and stay in my self catering. They actually can’t clean certainly not in any ordered sense. I’m not saying they don’t try but they do random unnecessary things instead of the simple easy list asked of them.

their kids aren’t always that lovely.

my house is a riot and I only care for certain people but otherwise I just put up with it, what’s the point I. Tidying away toys when they erupt two seconds later.

My hair isn’t quite as lustrous as yours though, is what I was trying to say @TheSnootiestFox

My house is clean as fuck though.

If it helps, I’m now picturing you as Mary from Gogglebox…

there will definitely be an element of not being concerned about what other people think, due to the security of money as part of their identity, and as a means (along with time) to correct whatever needs to be at a moment’s notice. I can’t let things get really scruffy because I don’t have the means to correct it when it does-either money or time.

Dog is groomed regularly but the children's hair hasn't seen a pair of scissors or a hairbrush in months.

That might actually be nearer 😁

And I'm educated and articulate, why would I write in a different style if it wasn't 'me'? Genuinely baffled 😬

I assume you're exaggerating?

But it's not this kind of affluent is it, mainly? Much more self-made/ business/football etc?

I’m curious as to why you felt compelled to share so much of your life on this thread? I think that, coupled with the whimsical prose, is why people doubted you and thought you were a spoof. People from a certain background tend towards discretion, rather than feeling the need to tell everyone all about it.

I have known plenty of mums like this, a lot of them Buddhists for some reason.

One I knew, she and her husband always had very nice clothes, hers in particular were one-off pieces that must have cost a fortune, kind of tailored hippy. But her kids, and son especially, always looked completely scruffy, with sweaters with holes in them, his hair in a non-haircut. (An expensive sweater with holes...)

They were nice but there was something about it I found a bit pretentious. Though if I had more money I might fall into that category because I like nice things but am not that tidy or organized.

Ha. That's exactly how it works out in reality. Nobody can ever find anything, ever. Everything from furniture to clothes is old/scruffy/passed round the family, but the DC's schools now charge £50k per year in fees so I'm bloody glad they are all at university.

I grew up like this and have carried the tradition on. I've never considered myself to be cool, though. Probably because I'm not.

The things I read about on MN that perplex me are skirting boards and mopping. What are people actually mopping? I don't possess a mop.

Loos and basins are clean, because it is genuinely easy to stick some bleach down a loo and wipe a basin with a magic sponge when the mood takes you.

Nice skirting boards, @whatkatydid2013. I like the decorative bit, too.

Because I enjoy writing. And it's an anonymous Internet forum with a demographic I think based mainly at the other end of the country. Noone is going to approach me in real life and say Hello Fox, I read what you posted......

Also Callie Coles - her life in the country looks divine and everything is fabulously chaotic

(This was a quote of an earlier post of an instagram account but it didnt work!)

Cheshire? You don’t think there’s old money in Cheshire? Or generally in the North of England? Are you alright?