to think phones should be banned for kids?!

[Glassesfrompubs]

I'm kinda ranting here because I can do it anonymously, where really I want to stand in the playground and scream at the top of my lungs... so to save me from social death I'm going to do it here instead!!

My DS is 7 (yr 2). He has kids in his class who have their own mobile phones, who use TikTok and other social media. I'm pretty pissed off because my son was told he was a "loser" because he doesn't know what TikTok is. FFS no seven year old should have a phone!

I just do not understand it and I think it's pretty negligent parenting - none of these kids are travelling to school by themselves. There is literally no reason for young children to have a phone other than their parents giving themselves and easy life and giving into pester power.

For older kids too... everyone I know who is a teacher or has secondary-aged kids says phones are the single worst thing in their kids' lives. teachers spend far too much time dealing with this crap and not actually teaching. Parents feel totally beholden to allow their kids to have them, but equally feel like the devices and constant social interaction is ruining their children's lives.

I really feel like kids shouldn't even be allowed their own devices. If they have to have them for getting to/from school then they should be locked in a box at the start of the school day, and returned at the end. Am I the only one who feels like this?!

I guess I think maybe less socially acceptable!?

You can't really just decide to make things less socially acceptable though. Or make them illegal. It is down to parents to control their dc's phone access, and a large proportion of parents are addicted themselves, both to their own phones and to using tech to keep their children quiet/busy. And are incapable of saying no.

Agreed. Unironically I agree they should be actually banned for children (under 13 or so not 18) it makes more sense to ban them outright then to say "it's your decision as a parent" because everyone else will give their kid an iPhone and yours will be the outcast.
So yeah it's better to just ban them outright for kids.
People will say "that's tyranny" but you could argue the same thing about cigarettes being illegal for under 18s. So yeah I don't care call me a tyrant

"Unfortunately they will be socially ostracised if they don't have Snapchat and Tiktok in high school."

Not my experience at all. At my kids high school phones are completely banned whilst on site though. Maybe that's the difference.

We should have lockers in schools where kids place their mobiles before school. They can take them out after!

Back in 2007 my DS had a phone but that was because of her epilepsy. She could call me if she had a seizure or wasn't feeling well.

She was 7.

I work in a school, we take their phones off them for the day if they are seen using them inside or in class.

I've seen 15 year old kids have full on meltdowns because they haven't got their phones, literally panicking, sweating, crying because they cannot live without them.

They'll feign sickness so they go home to get it back. It's a sad sad addiction for some kids.

DD is year 4 and there are some with phones in her class so she has weakly mentioned it to me but was shut down immediately. I know a year 3 with a phone and kids in her class have TikTok. I despair of parents who seem to lack common sense and the ability to actually have some sort of authority

Should be illegal to have a phone unless you're 16
It's destroyed kids

This is very dramatic. I have two adult Children who had phones from secondary school and they are fine.

I totally agree.

My kids will not get a phone til they are at least 14 for this reason.

Agree.

Its not actually. When you consider a child's brain is not fully developed before age 25 (and therefore ability to avoid addiction and self regulate) then banning until age 16 doesn't sound so bonkers.

I don't agree. Are you saying they shouldn't be allowed to play on a Nintendo Switch?

YANBU. Phones are so fucking damaging, I wish they were 'illegal' too. Why a little child is allowed free rein of tiktok is not something I can understand.

That's comparing apples and pears!

Just FYI

We are in the process of choosing secondary schools. Every single school tour, I've asked the child 'guide' whether they needed a phone in years 7 and 8.

Overarching response??

No.

My dc had a phone at 7. thankfully it was at the recommendation of a judge in family court because it gave both them and me peace of mind that I could be contacted when on enforced visitation with their father. Now age 10 dd2 walks to and from school alone and it's very helpful. It allows her to be able to go to the park for a bit with friends before coming home. Dd1 has currently had no phone for a week and it's been problematic. She hasn't been able to ride her pony out alone. She's been unable to call when she's done at the yard or check the yard chat/ Facebook page for updates. We've never had any issues. Tbh the dc who do have parents at either extreme - those who completely leave them to it and don't supervise and even more so those who try to seriously restrict, it's not realistic these days and just causes kids to want it more

Classic Mumsnet comment.

So you don't think gaming is dangerous, just phones?

I don't agree with Children on TikTok but I think secondary Children with a phone is fine.

I love Nintendo Switch for the Children. You can play online.

DD goes to secondary school next year and will only have a short walk so a phone won’t be necessary then either. Her teacher mentioned at parents’ evening the grief that they cause in her year and the time the teachers spend dealing with the upset from messages that the children send to each other, and said from experience it’s best to hold off for as long as possible into secondary school.

Our dc are told at their visit to high school to photograph their timetable and save it as their Home Screen. And homework written on the board they are asked to photograph. Its expected now that they will have a phone. Your primary teacher may not be aware or giving the best advice

My 3.5 year old has her own iPhone. She loves using the camera and I've bought her some educational fun apps, plus she enjoys watching YouTube and be in control of it. She watches what she wants, obviously toddler stuff. She's not on it all day obviously.

Do what you want but teenagers all keep in touch with a mobile phone. I'm very protective but I wouldn't have wanted my lad to not be able to join his friends messaging this way.

So how do you expect secondary school kids to arrange socials without a phone or even ask their mates about the homework? They also have their homework and timetable on their phones via school app. My 13-year-old certainly isn't damaged by her phone, is super sociable and competes in her sport at a very high level. She uses her phone to communicate with her mates 🤷‍♀️Plus to communicate with me!

Exactly. How would they ever arrange anything without a phone? It's a bit embarrassing at that age to still be arranging meet-ups via the parents