Getting hassled on holiday by locals

[LittleMissUnreasonable]

I've arrived on holiday a couple of days ago and can't believe how off-putting to business some of the locals are. The two main examples so far;

• Going to a market to have a look around, and wanting to buy some gifts.

Market trader: "Madam do you want to buy this scarf" Me: "No thanks just looking at the moment" "I can give you a good price" "No thank you" "I can sell for x" I end up just walking away as I have ASD and can't concentrate on what I actually want to buy and it's overwhelming someone getting in my face trying to sell something I'm not looking at.

Second scenario was a taxi ride
"When are you going home, I can do airport taxis"
"22nd, we have a taxi sorted thank you"
"I can do it for 15 ( example amount, much higher than our booked one)
"No thanks, we have it booked cheaper for 10 " (true)
"I can do it for 12.50"
"No thanks , we have a cheaper one booked"
He then gets arsey and moody so we have a quiet journey. 5 minutes later he hands us a business card and asks us to contact him if we need a driver. Yeah sure, a miserable man who tried to offer an inflated price for a journey we already sorted, and got irritated we didn't accept...

I don't want to name the country because I don't want to give bad opinions to someone who might want to go, but it's Asia (the Thailand/Indonesia/Malaysia/Philippines sort of vibe). But Im surprised that people think this is a way to get business. I saw loads of people looking at the markets before being scared off by persistent sellers.

Does anyone else feel the same?

When we were on a tour of China we were taken to a silk store and I asked our guide to tell them that I wanted to buy silk, my daughter was being married later that year, but I did not want hassling and it worked although they didn't look happy about it.
As for the claims of sexism, that women are targeted more than men, my late OH was the world's softest touch, I always insisted on carrying the money!

Turkey is even worse

Apparently different countries have different cultures! Who knew?
Travel and broaden your mind, or don’t. The choice is entirely yours.

OP, you haven't travelled much, have you?

This is standard tourist fare.

🙄

We avoid destinations where there is likely to be hassle as my daughter has ASD and wouldn’t cope well. That does mean sticking to Europe which is more expensive. I assume cost of living is cheap to tourists where you are OP? People likely to be poorer and desperate for income? I’ve been to N and W Africa a few times and loved it but didn’t love the hassle but understood that people are desperate for tourist cash.

Yes, I get that it can be horrible and stressful when you're not from the same culture.

I find it most effective to be quite rude (for me) in response - bark "No" at them, don't make eye contact, and if they keep hassling you walk away. If for example you are trying to look at the neighbouring stallholder's things, look directly at then, hold out a hand in a stop sign and say "Stop!" Before completely ignoring them.

What would be rude for me is just straight talking in this type of culture.

It's totally a cultural thing. Saying no is taken as an invitation to revise the price until you agree. It can be uncomfortable for anyone from a different culture. My DP walks away from restaurants where they try to engage you when you're looking at the menu outside. I've told him if we ever go to Turkey he'll go hungry or we'll end up in McDonald's every meal because they do it everywhere.

That's just how it is in many parts of the world. Being hassled is normal, haggling is normal, being one step ahead of the latest tourist scam is normal. People need your money and they hustle any which way to get it.

Before I went to Thailand I'd already read about the tuk tuk scam, where you ask how much a journey will be, they say $20, then when you arrive and go to pay, they say no, $20 per person. On the one occassion i didnt confirm, I got stung with it. I was stolen from while I slept in Cambodia, had my stuff stolen on a seemingly deserted Malyasian beach, nearly had my ID seized by an aggressive Thai car rental lady who wouldn't accept that she'd rented me something with a massive engine problem (that I had to have fixed by a passing random, in the middle of nowhere). It's part and parcel of South East Asia travel.

It's similar in many parts of Asia, the Middle East and Turkey, Morocco, Tunisia, South and Central America, to varying degrees. Even in many European party/family holiday areas you can't look at a restaurant menu without being hounded by a waiter/the owner.

If you don't like it then you need to stick to travelling in wealthier countries.

I would echo the suggestion of learning how to say a firm ‘no’ in the native language of where you are visiting. (Even better, ‘no, I don’t want that’, or ‘I’m not interested’.) Some countries have tourist police, who are there to stop tourists getting ripped off (which in turn does reputational damage to the country’s tourism industry) so check out in advance if the one you’re visiting does and be prepared to mention them if the hassle feels very threatening. Most people will give up on you quickly if you’re firm as it’s not worth their time to carry on but sometimes it can feel very uncomfortable.

The haggling is just something to live with and if you can’t handle it just avoid those situations.

Can you speak another language , if so respond in that and tell the you don't understand English and just walk off

i’m all for women standing up against harassment but this happens to anyone, man or woman! And it doesn’t sound like OP stood there like a lemon.

Also seems quite mild in my experience, I’ve had far, far worse particularly in the region OP mentions. I’ve had more persistent salespeople on my doorstep in the UK tbh. You can’t really expect to visit impoverished countries where some of these sales might be the difference between a decent meal that night or not and never experience a bit of the hard sell. As OP did, you just keep saying no and/or walk off, it’s that simple.

Oh god we got this all the time in Thailand. They normally start by asking which country are you from? We used to have a new place everyday. Aberystwyth was the funniest. Then start speaking in a made up language ‘mingalooga, daytynola’ whatever you can think of. Look around you for inspiration ‘restauranta chinesoa, palma terea’ just be friendly, say it all with a smile and walk on!

I don't trust any seller who doesn't advertise prices. Basically, they'll charge what they like after appraising the buyer.

Mind you, I walked out of Clarks shoe shop this week after a pushy sales assistant made me feel uncomfortable.

I get that people have a job to do but hard selling is counter productive, surely it just puts people off. If you feel intimidated in eg a foreign marketplace, you'll tell your fellow travellers to avoid it.

It obviously isn’t counter-productive or they wouldn’t do it. They’ll be doing whatever gets the best results, not just randomly hassling. Some people like it. Some people get railroaded into buying. Whatever the reason, it must have proved effective.

It works enough of the time to be used. Would you not expect them to be intelligent enough to change tactics if it didn’t work?

I always see this weird question trotted out in comments on this or similar topics. It may not work with some people but it clearly works on others. Why is that such a hard concept?

Our (booked) taxi didn't turn up to take us to the airport at the end of our holiday in Turkey. We ended up running dangerously late. My sister had to go in a separate taxi to the rest of the family and was absolutely fleeced by the bastard driver who was aggressive and rude. It left a really unpleasant taste after a lovely break.

How dare those locals with their poverty, lack of social safety net, desperation for tourism income and cultural differences in directness of interaction make wealthy (because you are to them), Western travellers feel uncomfortable? YANBU, OP, how dare they make you feel out of your comfort zone in their country.

Reminds me of a time a colleague went Sri Lanka in the 1990s, and was outraged to find out that there was a civil war on! I mean, how dare they?!

It works enough of the time to be used. Would you not expect them to be intelligent enough to change tactics if it didn’t work?

I always see this weird question trotted out in comments on this or similar topics. It may not work with some people but it clearly works on others. Why is that such a hard concept?

And I wonder how much more they'd sell if they did!!! 😀

We may never know, but if I was in business, I'd research my market and tailor things a bit.

YABU. Different culture. Different way of doing things.

Depends where you go - in many areas this is an absolutely normal part of the culture.

But in most tourists areas you will get something. It's a rare trip to Cambridge when you don't get someone attempting to sell you a punting trip.

The cheap markets in Asian countries are not only frequented by Westerners. In non-tourist season, they are frequented by locals. Locals like to bargain. It's often a friendly process. People who don't like to bargain just go to malls or order off Amazon.

I’d suggest they wouldn’t sell as much. For example the ones that wander around the sun beds on the beach asking people if they want to buy (fake) designer sunglasses. I doubt just standing on the beach looking hopeful would generate so many sales.

Like a PP said, they do what works for them , no matter how annoying it is for us.

Bartering is normal is many parts of the world . When you go q road you should research the culture and if it fits your ideal of a holiday . Lesson learned , next time do your homework

I was on a beach
Different sellers walked past offering their goods or services like massage
One man was selling a huge, evil looking bow & arrow & I laughed & said that would not get through customs at the airport. However, it does not stop the sellers selling

Similarly, people sell all kinds of food & some kinds of food are not permitted through customs

I quite enjoy the haggling, it is part of the fun of travelling

You don’t think they have?
Bit arrogant to think you understand their business and the market in which they operate better than they do, don’t you think? Is it because the Western European/US model must be the best/only one in your view?