For not wanting to give up my glass of red?!

[RunOutOfMoney]

I look forward to a glass of red of an evening, and as much as I think I should stop, I actually don't want to. Is this a problem?

To clarify, I'm not talking more than a glass, and considering that the recommended units of alcohol per week is 14, this allows me to easily have a glass a day .

I remember, though, a time when I could give or take alcohol, and only used to partake very rarely. If I ever had to complete a medical questionnaire, I would put one to 2 units per month max . I think it's currently on my mind because of Stoptober, and it's played on my mind how resistant I was to the idea of joining in.

AIBU? I'm hoping I don't have an alcohol dependence because I am very particular. It has to be one particular bottle or I just don't buy it in. I think someone with a drink problem wouldn't mind what colour it is much less what actual type? I suspect the very fact I am asking is probably going to invite someone to tell me that that shows there's a problem, but it could also be argued that by keeping a finger on the pulse I show that I'm being responsible over it. I just thought I'd ask around and see if everyone else feels the same each evening?

Sounds absolutely fine, OP.

A medium-sized glass of red wine is 2.3 units, so if you're having 7 a week, you're 2.1 units over the recommended allowance of 14. If they're large glasses, you could be drinking double the amount recommended.

Not making any judgment, just thought perhaps you assumed one glass = one unit. It doesn't.

If you’re happy with your consumption why lie on health questionnaires?

I got in to a similar habit so I've started buying some nice treat non alcoholic drinks (like the posh elderflower sparkling drinks).

For me it was less about the actual alcohol and more just having a nicer drink in the evening as I would tend to drink water or tea all day. It's helped me break that habit and I only have alcohol a few nights a week.

Be warned OP, some pearl clutchers will be along shortly to gasp in horror that you had more than a thimble-full of claret and to advise you check in for rehab immediately.

I don't see what the issue is. If it's a treat you look forward to and it's not in excess, why not? Life is for living and enjoying those simple little moments.

I feel about alcohol like I do about chocolate, coffee, meat, starchy carbs and several other things. Unconvinced that life is better for me cutting these things out completely, and finding absolutely no health or any other difference in moderate consumption v non whatsoever, other than that life is slightly more miserable and difficult without enjoyable things like a nice glass of wine, a good cup of coffee or a lovely rare beef and horseradish sandwich, as I've just eaten for my lunch.

Ha , this made me laugh, we have the same glasses and a frequent quote in our house is to fill to the bee’s bottom !

I haven't read all the comments so apologies if I am repeating another poster. I was googling this the other day, as a I want to cut down my drinking, as sometimes I do it socially on the weekend just because everyone else is, when I could just have an alcoholic free alternative or soft drink. I am starting this week to try and just drink one day a week, rather than 2-3 days.
I read on various websites that you should have three consecutive alcohol free days a week as this is how long it takes for the liver to repair itself. The key word being consecutive days. So it is better to not drink, say, Mon-Weds then you could have 2 glasses on a Thursday, if you wanted to. If happy with just the one then obviously that is better! Otherwise your liver is working every day to clear the alcohol/toxins (whatever the word is), even though it's only a small amount.
Hope this helps

As a recovering alcoholic myself I'd say that you are a habitual drinker rather than a problem drinker but you do seem very aware of the situation so as long as it didn't creep up I can't see the harm.

However if you are concerned, you might want to, first check that you really aren't going over 14 units a week taking into account ABV and glass size and also think about having a couple of days alcohol free to give your liver a break? Good that you are aware of the risks though.

Totally agree @LoveBluey For us it was more about the "ceremony" as someone else mentioned..., had a bad day ? have a drink. Had a great day ? Lets celebrate. Chores done, dinner done, PJ's on, something good on TV.... lets have a drink. We'll often have a 0% beer or something posh but non alcoholic instead of alcohol now. Even bothering to put ice and a garnish in plain tonic some evenings is nice.

One glass is fine , any more than that and I would say you had a problem.

I’m currently in recovery from psychological alcoholism, I’ve never craved alcohol and always waited til evening etc but I went from one or two glasses per evening to at least one, sometimes two bottles per evening!!! Never got hangovers or missed work, it’s a habit that creeps up and can destroy lives, I’ve lost my home, my relationship and very nearly my son, all through drink and not thinking I had a problem because it’s what everybody does of an evening, currently nearly 6 months completely sober and I’m like a different person

This is exactly what I did recently when I tried CBD drinks. It was never about the alcohol, it was about having a different drink in the evening so I could unwind. By some Mumsnetter standards I would have been a “problem drinker” and “alcohol dependent” simply because I craved something to help me relax after a long day. Like you say it’s a habit but one that is easy to break.

If it's the only thing you look forward to at the end of a day, and you can't do without it, it's a problem... If you were busy in the evening and forgot to have a glass and went to bed without it, would you be ok with that? Or, would you have changed your plans to make sure you get that glass of wine in?

I believe there are health benefits to drinking red wine in the quantities you are having (assuming one small glass a day) although research is ongoing.

Most advise not drinking every day, but to be honest I do not see a problem at all with your drinking habits. Every official/ medical stance is always a big no to drinking but that’s to protect those who can’t control their consumption in my opinion, as of course the risks then outweigh the benefits.

I understand you when you say you used to drink much less and that’s a concern. I’m the same, used to take it or leave it, but like you I now fancy a glass in the evening, and I can always stop at one. Being in my 50s now and seeing loved ones around me succumbing to goodness knows what, one glass of wine isn’t a problem.

Enjoy your wine x

As with all things, it depends.

Firstly, how big are these glasses? The bottle should tell you how many units of alcohol are in it. A large glass of wine might be 3 units, which means having one every night would take you to 21 units per week. If you're only having a small glass you'd still be within your limit and it's better for you to space your weekly recommended limit out rather than drink it all in one or two binge sessions.

Secondly, I think in principle it's probably better not to drink every night, but if it's only one glass of wine per night I wouldn't say you had a problem.

I'd probably aim for 2-3 alcohol free nights per week.

I wish I could do that. I become a person that can’t stop drinking after the first one.

So it is recommended that you have ideally several days but at least 1 alcohol free day in a week. It sounds like your intake has increased so I would be considering how it feels. As in, do you find yourself feeling like you just need to get to the end of the day and you can have a glass to relax or you're stressed but telling yourself it'll be ok because you have that coming. Not saying it is, but if that's the case I would be making changing to the environment to allow you to stop needing a glass every night. It shouldn't take alcohol to be able to relax.
That said if it's just something you enjoy end of, then it should be no problem to not have it every night. Just like we don't necessarily eat junk food every etc.

Healthy live and kidneys have no need of a couple of days a week without alcohol, when we're talking about a single glass of red wine. It's like saying your body needs a day without an apple.
There is no scientific basis for that guideline, and there is nothing at all wrong with having a glass of red wine a day. Some of the healthiest, most long lived people in the world drink red wine daily.

I'm here to talk about risks! My doc told me to cut down wine when I saw her about her. She gave me this. Note was a few years ago but I think there is a link with breast cancer

Lots and lots of people (myself included) have a glass or two of wine with their evening meal ... they probably don't comment on this thread to avoid being labelled alcoholics.

Strictly speaking I am sure everyone could lead a healthier lifestyle by stopping drinking, overhauling their diet, increasing exercise routines, never travelling in a car, plane etc but most of us want to enjoy life and the chance of one daily glass of wine affecting your life adversely is very, very low.

A small risk more than ameliorated by taking enough exercise and choosing oestrogen only HRT.

Having an issue with alcohol doesn’t always mean you have a lot or don’t care what it is.

Personally, if I felt I needed a drink. Even if it is one small glad a day, that would concern me.

It’s not really down to the amount. It’s down to the dependence on it.

I completely agree. Yes, our bodies need nourishing, but so do our souls. And good food and drink can be a huge part of that.

And I believe it’s an order of magnitude healthier to eat a delicious, wholesome home cooked meal with a glass of wine every night (and maybe a sliver of cheese to finish) than some ghastly ‘healthy’ frozen Quorn concoction and a glass of Diet Coke.

I have to admit feeling slightly pleased when I discovered Professor Tim Spector also enjoys a glass of red wine each night. He also proclaims cheese and tea as jolly healthy, so I like him very much.