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AIBU?

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Original poster

Am I a bad neighbour? :/

285 replies

GM99 · 14/10/2023 22:51

I have recently bought a top floor flat in a victorian conversion in London. When I moved in, the previous owners left me a lovely note with really useful information including that the original floorboards were still in tact if I wanted to rip the carpet up. There was carpet in the hallway, on the stairs, on the landing and in the study. The carpet was pretty gross so I made the decision to have the floorboards reclaimed and someone came to rip out the carpets.

In the meantime, I met the neighbours downstairs - a couple in their 30s, no kids, he works from home full time and she works in an office full time. I've only had conversations with him. He's taken a couple of parcels in for me while I have been at work. He came across fairly relaxed and relatively friendly but I noticed he kept asking questions about what I was planning to do with the flat...which I did find a bit annoying because I got the feeling he was only talking to me to see, basically, how annoying a neighbour I was going to be rather than genuinely being friendly. He told me that the previous owners were a couple with a son with learning difficulties and the son used to bang and stamp really loudly on the floor which they found very difficult so they liaised with the neighbours who agreed to get carpet and some kind of soundproofing. I only found this out after getting the carpets ripped out. I asked him if I was noisy and he was like 'oh no no, everything is fine'. I said I didn't want anyone to feel uncomfortable and that he should let me know if there were any issues.

Anyway, this morning I got a text message from him and his partner asking me to come round for drinks to discuss the flooring as they said they had noticed that it was much more noisy since I ripped the carpet out. I've agreed to go over but I'm not sure how I feel about the whole situation.

Firstly, I'm single, in my late 30s and live by myself and live a quiet lifestyle. I'm not running around having a rave every night so even though I understand they can probably hear me when I'm walking around, is it unreasonable of them to start interfering in how I decide to go my flat up - ie getting the floorboards reclaimed? What is a reasonable amount of noise for them to deal with? Given the nature of the flats and how they have been built, it's highly doubtful that all noise can be eliminated. I'm concerned they are going to try and persuade me into getting soundproofing which I can't afford. I work from home 2-3 days a week. I can understand it may have been a bit noisy recently as I have just moved in and have been getting people over to provide quotes on flooring, painting and decorating etc.

Any thoughts/opinions would be greatly appreciated :)

OP posts:
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5
HarperMae · 14/10/2023 22:54

If I lived in a flat with someone below I wouldn't even consider wooden flooring for this reason, and I'd like to think that neighbours would feel the same.

Cookerhood · 14/10/2023 22:55

Many leases don't allow wooden flooring for this reason.

Coldinscotland · 14/10/2023 22:56

Tell them to are happy to receive a rug for Christmas... Ime person can't be affecting them that much unless you tap dance at the week ends...

IdaPolly · 14/10/2023 22:56

When I moved in, the previous owners left me a lovely note with really useful information including that the original floorboards were still in tact if I wanted to rip the carpet up
Did they not like the downstairs neighbours?

Topee · 14/10/2023 22:57

Anything other than a ground floor flat should be carpeted. It’s often stipulated in the lease as well.

Iturnedmyfaceaway · 14/10/2023 22:57

The people you bought from are bad neighbours. They have encouraged you knowing it would be a problem

DarkModeSetting · 14/10/2023 22:57

What does the lease say?
Lots of conversions say that they must be carpeted except kitchens and bathrooms

Youcancallmeirrelevant · 14/10/2023 22:58

Cookerhood · 14/10/2023 22:55

Many leases don't allow wooden flooring for this reason.

This, have you checked yours? I would never have wooden floors in a flat if i was above other people.

You're top floor so you don't have any experience of how the noise travels

mushti · 14/10/2023 22:58

When I lived upstairs in a Victorian maisonette, it was a condition of the lease that the floors had to be carpeted.

You absolutely shouldn't have any kind of hard floor above someone else's flat.

PenguinRainbows · 14/10/2023 22:59

YABU. It is selfish to have wooden flooring in a top floor flat. You should be looking to replace the carpet.

VeronicasCloset · 14/10/2023 22:59

Amazed how many people fail to realise that a lease of a flat is just a right to use it to a certain extent within a fixed time. I would be very surprised if there isn’t a covenant in your lease that requires living areas to be carpeted, or at the minimum to be covered with a sound deadening material. I expect you are in breach of the lease.
The other flat owners will have the right to ask the landlord to enforce that covenant.
If you don’t remedy the breach in good time, the landlord is entitled to take back possession. It’s unlikely that would happen over removing a carpet, but the risk is there.
Legalities aside, yabu SO unreasonable to expose floorboards in a flat with people living beneath you.

SacAMain · 14/10/2023 22:59

which I did find a bit annoying because I got the feeling he was only talking to me to see, basically, how annoying a neighbour I was going to be rather than genuinely being friendly.

can you blame him? It's a natural thing to do. He's friendly enough if he's already taking parcels for you.

even though I understand they can probably hear me when I'm walking around, is it unreasonable of them to start interfering in how I decide to go my flat up
It's not "interfering", it's trying to have quiet enjoyment of their own place. You decide to have a flat with neighbours underneath, you must show a bit of respect.

You could, at the very least, explain that you are putting rugs to minimise the noise.

Ideally, get a friend to walk around in your flat while you are visiting the neighbours. You would have a better idea of the level of noise they have to put up with, and find where their bedroom is - that's where they will try to sleep, they will be more sensitive to noise in it.

margotrose · 14/10/2023 23:00

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Aquamarine1029 · 14/10/2023 23:01

Don't meet for drinks. They are going to try to back you into a corner. You need time to figure out what you want to do with your floors.

friendlycat · 14/10/2023 23:02

DarkModeSetting · 14/10/2023 22:57

What does the lease say?
Lots of conversions say that they must be carpeted except kitchens and bathrooms

You do need to check this. Wooden floors are very noisy for the neighbours beneath. Many leases expressly state no bare floorboards due to the sound carrying badly.

Even in a ground floor fault the noise carries as well. They may look great but without soundproofing they aren’t a good option especially for upstairs flats.

Ivesaidenough · 14/10/2023 23:02

The flat above us was bought by a landlord who put in wooden floors. He was luckily a really nice man, reasonable enough to come and listen when we asked him to judge how noisy it was. If you have shoes on it's really loud. He replaced the carpets.
And I agree the people you bought from have done that deliberately, to set you up as revenge on their downstairs neighbours. Not very kind.

SoEffingGrumpy · 14/10/2023 23:03

Am I a bad neighbour?

Yes.

TeeedleDum · 14/10/2023 23:05

So going against the consensus here but I don't think you're being unreasonable at all (unless you are breaching any building rules, I'd check your paperwork like others have suggested). We rented a top floor flat (our flat was new build and built on top of an existing building) which had wood flooring and never even occured to me it would be an issue. I really hate carpet and would never get it if I had a choice - I'd be tempted to get rugs and wear socks/ slippers around (no shoes) to minimise noise but apart from that I wouldn't change anything.

AFieldGuideToTrees · 14/10/2023 23:06

It's really inconsiderate and selfish to have anything other than carpets in a flat above the ground floor.

Even if you think you're being quiet, on a wooden floor you won't be. To your downstairs neighbours you'll probably sound like a horse galloping across the floor.

It was also a dick move for the previous inhabitant to suggest ripping the carpets up.

EsmeSusanOgg · 14/10/2023 23:06

Nah, it is your flat and you are generally quiet. If you want to reduce sound get some rugs for higher traffic areas.

Gazelda · 14/10/2023 23:07

You've been stitched up by the previous owners.

Accept their offer of a drink and chat. Get someone to walk around in your flat while you are downstairs. Then consider how you can make the situation better for your neighbours. Maybe a compromise on which rooms you carpet. Perhaps rugs in some rooms. Shoes-off policy for visitors etc.

Aquamarine1029 · 14/10/2023 23:08

Are you wearing shoes when you walk around your flat?

ballsdeep · 14/10/2023 23:08

IdaPolly · 14/10/2023 22:56

When I moved in, the previous owners left me a lovely note with really useful information including that the original floorboards were still in tact if I wanted to rip the carpet up
Did they not like the downstairs neighbours?

Well if they loved the floorboard themselves why didn’t they rip the carpet up.

I think they probably did in the past , had the same problems then put carpet down now want to get back at neighbours

LifeIsHardAlways · 14/10/2023 23:09

I thought it was a given that you have carpet if you live above someone. Even if you’re generally quiet, pretty crap for them to have to hear all your movements…

Londonscallingme · 14/10/2023 23:10

As others have said, check your lease. If no stipulation and you would like to keep the wooden floors there are things you can do to reduce the noise;

  • lift floorboards and fill between the joists with insulation.
  • If possible, try to add a slightly squashy layer of something between the joists and the floorboards
  • get a big rug and use with good underlay
  • edit to add - obviously shoes off but I guess you’re already doing that.
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