To think any parent would do the same? Or am I bonkers

[Doritosandsourcream]

On holiday in the buffet eating dinner all I could hear was my son crying walking from the bar with his juice in his hand. I thought oh maybe he fell over so DH went over to him. Turns out that this little girl that has been picking on him for the past 2 days her dad has grabbed DS and twisted arm so tight he broke his skin and dug his nails into him. (German family)

DS has been coming to me about her saying she keeps pushing him and sticking her fingers up since they arrived. DS finally got annoyed and pushed her back earlier on in the day and she told her dad. So dad got his own back on DS.

I ran over to DH as he was shouting at the dad and the dad was just smirking and something just came over me and I punched him in the face.

Never in my life have I punched anyone and I didn’t think about the consequences at the time I just kept looking at my son he was in flood of tears.

It was the weirdest feeling I have never felt adrenaline like it.

aibu? How would you have handled it? The hotel did absolutely nothing.

awwww yea hun I always tell my dc not to hit ppl bcs its wrong to hit ppl but they no ill hit anyone who hurts them lol xxxxx

Hmmm, so unless you actually see someone abusing your child, you won’t believe them if they come and tell you that someone’s hurt them?

I sincerely hope that isn’t what you mean, or that you are going to be childless, because if not, your child won’t ever feel that you’ve got their back.

I have already answered a 'deliberately misinterpreting the meaning and casting judgement on parental skills' post, nice try though.

@Doritosandsourcream stated that they were “in the buffet eating dinner”.

Dinner is generally widely (and globally) acknowledged to be the meal eaten in the evening. It is the main/biggest meal of the day. Luncheon or lunch is the midday meal and is somewhat heavier than breakfast, but lighter than dinner, hence why it’s called lunch hour, not dinner hour in schools. Supper is generally usually served when the main/biggest meal has been taken at luncheon and then a light afternoon “tea” has been taken. Example: Christmas Day lunch is usually a big meal and then a light supper might be served in the evening for those who feel peckish.

I suspect that you were looking for some hole to pick in the OP, but her timing for dinner at 18:30 is correct 💐

I wasn’t “trying” anything. I was, and still am, astonished by the fact that you said that OP didn’t see the adult do anything to the child.

I'm just not sure why that matters? What difference does it make? Children get murdered and just because no one sees it, apart from the perpetrator doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. Children get abused by adults every day. Just because no one sees it doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.

I don’t see why you felt the need to say that OP didn’t see it happen, as if that means that the child was lying. Is that really where your mind would go in this situation? And I ask that as a genuine question, because I honestly and truly do not understand why not seeing it happen is important!

Oh, and reel back the paranoia! I don’t know you, or whether you have children, or what type of parent you are/will be, and I’m not “casting judgement on (the unknown) parental skills (or lack thereof)”.

Read the existing replies, it's clear what you are trying to do. I won't be engaging further.

The amount of women who appear to believe that there’s something aspirational about a mum punching a grown adult is truly disturbing to me.

It’s toxic as fuck that violence is something to be cheered on or glorified if it’s a mum being violent - feeling her inner “lioness” or “mama bear”.

You shouldn’t be celebrated because of your biological instincts or red mist or inner mummy-warrior status or whatever - you’re just being a thug, the same as any other thug on a Saturday night starting a fight outside a nightclub.

I’m not trying to do anything, except get some sense of why, an adult seeing someone assault their child, makes any difference. I shall go and look for these existing replies, but I am genuinely perplexed, and interested. It may surprise you to know, but when I see something that isn’t the way that I view a situation, I do try to find out what’s behind that reasoning. Not to try and catch someone out, but because I’m genuinely interested and curious. I think it’s an autism thing tbh, because I’ve been like this my whole life and I’ve always been a “why” person. It’s a shame that you’ve got a bee in your bonnet about replying as I would have liked to have known 💐

Also @Leah5678

The American Defence Language Centre has masses of languages available to learn, completely free, you sign up with just your email address. They also give background to the country, what life is like, etc., and you can get to a very high level and learn how to write the language and the pronunciations. Of course, some of the things you learn, such as “put your weapon down” and “this is a grenade” aren’t useful, although bearing in mind the topic of this thread, “I will shoot you” could be useful 😂

I would have done the same!! Don't feel guilty or ashamed either. He's just lucky it was you and not his dad who's smacked him. Man deserved it! And yes I know thays not the correct answer but sometimes some people just need a punch in a face and he's one of them

@Namechangeforreasons It’s a shame that you’ve got a bee in your bonnet about replying as I would have liked to have known 💐

Well, if you read existing replies you can know.

Absolutely. I'm quite taken aback by the number of posters promoting violence as the answer to conflict resolution

OP I think i would have done the same and probably not just one punch. This "man" intentionally assaulted a child, would I F**K think twice about kicking his teeth in.

I think I could be using the search thingy wrong, but from the replies I’ve read (yours), I can’t find the answer and I can see that it’s upsetting you, so I’ll ask DH tomorrow as it’s probably one of those things that’s gone over my head!! Anyway, you can DM if you want to, but please believe I wasn’t casting aspersions on your parenting skills or style. Also, I do tend to take what people write on the forum as the truth, because why lie? And do look up the American Defence language thing. It’s not the FSI, which might come up, I’ll see if I can find the link. Some of the languages have over 8000 hours of learning, so you can get really fluent and because it teaches you sentence structure, it’s quite easy to then put your own sentences together 🌷

I am happy with my language learning options, I already have plenty on the go so don't need any more.
I'm also not upset, but the point you are going over has already been addressed a few times. I suspect OP is actually a troll and/or has made parts of this up/omitted information. I have spent too much time on it already and don't plan to give any more tbh. I won't be replying to any posts, not just yours.

Like a pp, I am absolutely shocked at the number of posters advocating violence. I’ve been reading the thread on kids not being allowed to use school toilets because they smash them up and younger kids won’t go in because they fear getting beaten up. It’s not difficult to see a connection here.

Yes. Generational thuggery. Under the cringeworthy ‘defence’ of ‘Mamabear’.

I wonder what the long-term outcomes of kids from these kinds of families will be. It’s depressing. Poor kids. Let’s hope they have more civilised role models in their lives.

I mean if this is real then YANBU to react this way after someone physically hurt your child on purpose, but I do struggle to take this as real….a random German man giving a Chinese burn to a 6 year old that breaks the skin

It's probably an awful lot easier to "prove" what a fierce "Mama Bear" you are by smacking somebody in the mouth than it is to accept that the type of holidays you take may be constrained as you shouldn't be teaching your child that school is optional; to keep an eye on your child when they report there's been trouble with another child; even - gasp! - not to put them in children's club at all; to supervise them at the buffet...
I'd have rather done all that and headed off any problems, rather than let my children see me losing control and punching someone in the face.
But that all takes a lot more effort than taking a swing at someone.
If, indeed as Warum says, this is what happened.

Well isn't this thread depressing as fuck? No wonder there is so much violence in the world.

I would have sympathy for you punching a bloke as a last resort to try and stop him assaulting your son, but after the act? No. Absolutely pointless.

And as other posters have pointed out, unless your son is used to seeing his parents being violent, it was probably very scary for him.

Absolutely. This thread is awful.

When you really lose your rag in a situation, your 'civilised' self is not longer present and certainly not in control. I struck someone once when my beast-self got free and the most frightening thing is that you feel euphoric.
No, it's not the right thing to.do. It teaches your child dangerous ways. But cut yourself some slack. It is a natural response.

Oh it’s one of those threads.

Starts off all beige information, drop a very random bombshell in the middle then end the whole thing with a seemingly baffled ‘but Im not actually unreasonable!’. A million replies and being referenced forevermore as ‘Mumsnet Lore: The Ever Repeated Stories of Sistine Chapel, Snapped/Farted and I Punched A German Dad Like She Hulk On Steriods’….

Probably should have kicked him in the balls OP, it would have hurt more 😂 Well done to you, and hopefully that vile man will think twice about abusing a child in the future!