To not want my dd using these words?

[tiredmum9]

One of my dds (8 years old) has started describing people as dinlos or divs. She's picked this up from her nan, and as someone who tries hard not to pass on swearing to her kids it really irks me, i know it's not as severe as real swearing but its still name calling. Do your kids use these kind of words and do you allow it?

Dinlo is a Romany word, it was used a lot in Dorset in the 1960s (lots of travellers there). But it is an insult!

@Memberofstaff 2 out of the 3 followed that instruction. One has rebelled so I have it in the cupboard but refuse to touch it (she’s 15 and can make a sandwich) 😂

I'd go NC with any grandparent teaching youngsters words like this

Peak mumsnet

I'm not trying to be rude but genuinely am curious if this is a jokey or serious response?

Why would you need to call them anything? Sounds like you live in not the nicest area if people go around name calling all the time.

I would have guessed you were from Portsmouth also, I lived there for a while and thought than dinlo was a local word, I have seen various YouTube/tik tok videos where people have taken the piss out of Portsmouth specific dialect and that is always one of the words.

Depends who she's saying it too, peers fine, kids will always say idiot to each other at times, adults definitely not.

My DD10 is very anti swearing. She really doesn't like to hear it and we don't swear around her (or much at all really)
We do however say Divvy and Div. In my area its said with a laugh, not insulting at all. My mum and even my nan, who never swore, would even say it. It's the equivalent of 'silly billy' in my family/area.

Yeah because that's exactly what other parents do 🙄

You seriously can't think of one tiny way to stop your DD watching TV that you find inappropriate?

Jeez, wait till they're on the internet.

Tbh I was thinking more if you were in a cafe and it was a stranger 🤷🏼‍♀️

I'm not actually in the habit of insulting people (unless they're really pissing me off), but I do think the "holier than thou" attitude of never raising your voice, always being polite, never having a knee jerk reaction to something a little tiresome.

I do have a friend who called her DS a son-of-a-bitch. It took him a moment to work it out 😂 (He's an adult, chill)

I'm from Portsmouth and believe dinlo is a local phrase. It's not used aggressively here, more playful like silly rather than stupid if that makes sense.

Don't be obtuse. That thread explored why Saying you look like poo to a brown child is racist and a few shared their experiences. The school excluded the child for 2 days, so clearly it was deemed offensive.

Why should name calling be encouraged? I read all sorts on that thread, 6 year olds calling themselves willy, wanker etc and no one is horrified?

Do you live in Portsmouth?

Soon as I saw dinlo I thought Pompey! In fact, I was at Southsea Castle today and among their really rather good souvenirs was a card saying Happy Birthday to my favourite Dinlo!

Div is not acceptable imo. I’d tell off a student using it, as much as calling others thick, stupid etc.

It’s a Romany gypsy word. Used all over , not just in Dorset!

I always thought div came from divergent. I don't have any more of a problem with it than sod which also doesn't have great roots but the word itself exists now in its own right and sod off or div aren't hugely offensive IMO.

Never heard of dinlo.

No, Merseyside

I totally agree. If it was me I’d explain why I didn’t like those words and I wouldn’t allow them to be used and by the time I’d explained why, I’d like to think my child wouldn’t want to use them anyway.

I wouldn’t like it, no.

DS1 and DS2 (10 and 7) will use ‘silly billy’ or ‘wally’ at home. Yes, I’m sure they hear other words at school but that’s about the level of insult I’d accept from a primary school child so that’s where they stop.

I know dinlo as a Romany word mainly.

Divergent is a descriptive word, not offensive in any way.

yeah there are various stores that sell tshirts and prints with dinlo and squinny on lol.

I know the exact word you mean, and much to my utter shame I did use it when I was younger. I had absolutely no idea it stemmed from thalidomide, to me it was just a word that meant 'idiot' with no other connotations at all. Luckily for me, a friend pulled me up on it about ten years ago, and I was horrified to think of all the times I must have said it & caused offence. I've never used it since, and remain so grateful to my friend for explaining why it was offensive. Same with a documentary Jo Brand did about 20yrs ago explaining the origins of cretin & other slurs people use without knowing the origin.

I can forgive people using words in innocence, but once they're told why it's not unacceptable, there's no excuse.

Where I'm from divvy is pretty commonly used but I wouldn't want my kid name calling anyway.

Forgive me if I have misunderstood... YOU are the parent... she is the child.. you TELL her not to use words you do not want her to use... regardless of who else is using them!!
Really really does not matter what they mean... she does not use them because you say so!