AIBU for telling my "friend" that my husband isn't her concern?

[Empressofall]

100% believe I'm in the right here but you never know.
Context: My husband and I both work full time. Both have stressful jobs.
He has long shifts (10+ hours) but his days off can fall during the week when our child goes to daycare so he has actual time off to do as he pleases (it's just how his shifts work. No shade that our kid isnt at home with him. We still send him so we can keep his place and its fun for him) and I do not. I often bring work home and either work into the night or grab some time during baby's nap time. My "days off" are weekends where I'm 100% in charge of the house and our baby if my husband is working.
My husband is as hands on as he can be in the time that he has.
On to the issue: last night, he came home at around 7.30pm (late for him) and I'd already done grocery shop, laundry, bathtime, bedtime, cleaned the lounge etc. I was pretty tired.
I made dinner. I made breaded chicken (from frozen, like a Birds Eye packet), roasted garlic potatoes and salad. Not really a chore. But somewhat nutritious.
Husband was super grateful and ate it all up.
He then did the dishes.
I was chatting to my friend (let's call her A) about our day and she was appalled that I'd made my husband a "low effort and low quality dinner" and that "making him do the dishes after a long day at work was bitchy and unhelpful". Like... excuse me?! I also worked yesterday. And did 100% of the childcare/housework. I was exhausted. I didn't even ask him to do the dishes. He did them himself because he's an adult who knows how and when to wash dishes.
I told her this.
She told me not to be surprised when he finds someone willing to put more effort into the relationship. More context: A was involved with a married man who left his wife for her, citing that his wife didn't make enough effort. She's paranoid AF that he'll leave if she isn't 100% perfect. Their house is like a fucking show home and every meal is organic from scratch blah blah blah.
I got angry and told her that my husband isn't her concern, that if he leaves me because of a dinner then he's not much of a man. She then said ahe was only telling me "for your own good". I lost my sh1t and told her to f**k off.
Husband says I'm in the right. Another friend agrees with A that I should have put more effort into the meal and offered to do the dishes because husband worked a longer day than I did.
But the way I see it, we both worked so why is his job and work day more important than mine?

If anyone's wondering, I started work at 7am, finished at 3.30pm, did the grocery shop at 4.30pm (after commuting an hour), bathed baby at 6.40pm, put him to bed by 7.20pm and had 10mins to myself before husband came home. I started dinner as soon as he walked in.

Husband started work at 9.30am and got in at 7.30pm meaning he finished at 7pm.

Was I wrong to tell her this? Am I just lazy?
Edit: my husband never EVER expects me or even asks me to cook for him. We have VERY different tastes in food so we often just cook for ourselves because it's easier!

She sounds ghastly

Phase her out

She’s projecting her fears onto you. She sounds like a drain. I would (and have) distanced myself from these types of ‘friends’.

Is A my mother? Or in other words a 50’s housewife. Absolutely right to tell her to eff off.

Fuck my husband’s definitely leaving me then with the stuff I’ve dished up this week 😂😂😂😂😂 Joking he appreciates whatever meal he gets because he’s a bloody adult

Your 'friend' is batshit... and desperate by the sounds of it

Your friends sound batshit.

And sorely lacking in self esteem

That made me laugh!

This

Good god! My husband and I both work full time. I'm working from home 90% of time and often end up still working at 7pm.....husband gets home at 6. May or may not go out to gym class some evenings. If he isn't at a class he cooks. Always has. He enjoys it more than I do. I sort kids dinners earlier if he'll be late I sort the house, kids, washing, ironing, arrange anything housey jobs that need doing as I'm here most of the time. It works for us. I think we're both too knackered to be thinking the other half doesn't do enough to keep the other happy 😆
I'd say your nuts friend should keep her nose out and deserved to be told to fuck off!

Are you friends from the 1950s?!

Your H sounds brilliant, unlike your mates H’s who demand Stepford Wives.

I thought you were going to say your friend judges your DH for having two days off to himself in the week when he does as he pleases (when you seem to get no time off at all!)

Your friend is a massive dickhead. HTH.

And what effort do these women think men need to put in? ! None, presumably.

I love it when the very first reply nails it 🎯

Her insecurity about how her relationship started shines through here, and she's with a dickhead partner by the sounds of it! Left his wife because she "didn't do enough" what bullshit!

I know a woman like this. Her husband left his first wife because she 'wasn't glamorous enough' so this acquaintance lives in permanent stress at having to always look 'beautiful' - full face of makeup before breakfast, never seen in anything less than a 3 inch heel, even her house slippers are 'glamorous' with a raised heel.

She once tried to tell me that I too should 'always make an effort' as it would be my fault if DP looked elsewhere. Whatever love...I think I'd rather be on my own than live in permanent anxiety that my partner would leave me if I didn't live up to perfection.

This friend was rude and massively out of line. If she's chosen to live that way, that's her business but she has no right to tell others how to live.

She’s probably jealous your husband loves you for the life you have and she has to be a boring stale old dredge for hers, he will probably leave for someone who likes fish fingers and laughter

Anti-women ragebait.

1/10.

Just ignore her.

She chooses to live the way she does.

Your friend is jealous and nasty. She has huge red flags. She happily had an affair with a married man. And blames the first wife for it. Yuck. She is now jealous of your normal healthy and secure relationship and the only thing she could find to attempt to make you feel as shitty as she probably does is that you made (in her op) a below par dinner. You were in the right to tell her to F off. I would do again when you next hear from her.

I also thought she was going to be angry at your DH for being lazy and not having DC at home instead of nursery 😂

The first post nailed it - stop talking to these bat shit women.

@Saschka has this absolutely spot on

I know a woman, a well respected lady working at the national radio in my home country, who has admitted (about 15 - 20 years ago) to waking up an hour before her husband to make herself beautiful before he wakes up (he is about 10 years younger, she was in her late fifties at the time).

Fast forward a few years he left her for another woman, 25 years younger than him, the much younger version of his wife. He apparently is the one now who gets insecure and jealous of his wife, understandably. He is 70 now and hasn't aged very well.

This!

Plus this guy's ex-wife could have been making him cordon bleu meals every day, but he's not going to say that to his new woman is he? No, he's going to make up all sorts of shite, as married men looking for a bit on the side always do.

Silly woman has fallen for all his patter and is obviously insecure. All the fancy meals in the world won't stop him leaving her when someone new catches his eye.

Ignore her and carry on with your life as is!

I should add he is a former prime minister of my home country so his private life is very much in the media all the time.