Page 5 | To give up breastfeeding 3 week old?

Octosaurus · 2023-10-06T05:29:05+00:00

Every time I breastfeed my 3 week old he spend the next few hours crying, spitting up and wriggling in pain. On days where I exclusively breastfeed he also has had bad diarrhoea (12 poos a day vs his normal 5/6) and a red face and body. When he has formula (when i was sick in hospital and when my supply had been too low for his appetite) he is much more content. He drinks, he can be burped nicely, no vomiting or spitting up and no diarrhoea or red blotchy skin. I am so upset because I wanted to breastfeed and I feel like I can do it, I have a good latch and good supply now! The doctor said there's no way he can be allergic to breast milk end of. I am coeliac and don't eat wheat and I gave up milk in case there was a dairy allergy. I am seriously thinking I should switch to formula but I don't want to make him miss out on the benefits of BF and I'm afraid I will be judged. Anyone been through similar? Or got ANY advice?

Parker231 · 08/10/2023 10:04

TrailingLoellia · 08/10/2023 10:02

The way some babies nurse or bottle feed could include swallowing air with the breast milk if they have a gap in the side of their mouth. A sloppy latch on the breast can be repeated on a bottle.

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The OP has already said that her baby doesn’t get the same symptoms with a bottle of formula.

Magenta82 · 08/10/2023 10:10

TrailingLoellia · 08/10/2023 10:02

The way some babies nurse or bottle feed could include swallowing air with the breast milk if they have a gap in the side of their mouth. A sloppy latch on the breast can be repeated on a bottle.

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So do you honestly think a baby eould replicate that with a bottle of breast milk but magically not with a bottle of formula?

OP has repeatedly said there are no issues with formula but there are always issues with breastmilk however it is delivered.

SamanthaVimes · 08/10/2023 10:17

OP I volunteer at a bf peer support group. If you want to keep going then I’d really recommend trying to get some face to face support in your local area. 3 weeks Is quite a common low point.
That being said if your instinct is telling you to stop then go ahead and stop. You don’t need to feel guilty. How long is “best” to breastfeed for varies with every mum and baby pair. The right time to stop is when either mum or baby want to stop whether that’s after 1 feed or a million feeds.

Parker231 · 08/10/2023 10:24

SamanthaVimes · 08/10/2023 10:17

OP I volunteer at a bf peer support group. If you want to keep going then I’d really recommend trying to get some face to face support in your local area. 3 weeks Is quite a common low point.
That being said if your instinct is telling you to stop then go ahead and stop. You don’t need to feel guilty. How long is “best” to breastfeed for varies with every mum and baby pair. The right time to stop is when either mum or baby want to stop whether that’s after 1 feed or a million feeds.

The OP has posted that she has seen a doctor and breast feeding consultant.

denpark · 08/10/2023 10:36

It could be something in your diet that affecting him. My daughter was like that whenever I had onions so I had to cut those out (was already dairy free).

Babies can be allergic to breast milk so your doctor is very wrong in what they said. It's rare but it is possible.

Tiredbehyondbelief · 08/10/2023 11:48

Hi there, it's midwife with BFN experience again. Sorry, I couldn't finish my earlier post, had to dash off to take my son to football practice. I still think someone with specialist knowledge should see your baby's latch on the breast. I recollect numerous occasions from my infant feeding support group experience when a woman would say, "10 people had a look at my baby's latch already and said it was fine". Well, it wasn't and a slight adjustment made a lot of difference. While you trying to sort through those problems (I won't blame you if you stopped trying), I would want to make sure your baby's is taking enough milk. How to tell? In 24 hours a baby your age should have a least 2 good poos and 6 very wet nappies. If your baby is having those, your baby is taking sufficient quantities of milk. I am only saying this because you said you went to EBF. It takes 3 days for the woman's body to adjust to difference in demand (either up or down, milk is produced on supply and demand basis). If you milk supply has come down since you have been topping with some formula expect your baby feed, feed and feed for 3 days. As long as your baby is peeing and weeing and waking up for feeds regularly (at least 8 feeds in 24 hours) all is fine in a baby's world. If you baby is not doing as above your will need to work on milk supply by pumping regularly while topping up with some formula/expressed milk. I know this is all very hard work. Please don't beat yourself up if your decide you can't keep struggling like this anymore. If you decide to persevere I really do think you need to find your local breasfteeding support group as a matter of urgency. I hope it helps

TheGoogleMum · 08/10/2023 11:57

I wouldn't judge someone for stopping breastfeeding. If you need to stop that is fine. I formula fed one baby and breastfed the other. I firmly felt if breastfeeding became too challenging for whatever reason I would stop and formula feed as a baby is hard enough without feeding challenges

Parker231 · 08/10/2023 12:09

Tiredbehyondbelief · 08/10/2023 11:48

Hi there, it's midwife with BFN experience again. Sorry, I couldn't finish my earlier post, had to dash off to take my son to football practice. I still think someone with specialist knowledge should see your baby's latch on the breast. I recollect numerous occasions from my infant feeding support group experience when a woman would say, "10 people had a look at my baby's latch already and said it was fine". Well, it wasn't and a slight adjustment made a lot of difference. While you trying to sort through those problems (I won't blame you if you stopped trying), I would want to make sure your baby's is taking enough milk. How to tell? In 24 hours a baby your age should have a least 2 good poos and 6 very wet nappies. If your baby is having those, your baby is taking sufficient quantities of milk. I am only saying this because you said you went to EBF. It takes 3 days for the woman's body to adjust to difference in demand (either up or down, milk is produced on supply and demand basis). If you milk supply has come down since you have been topping with some formula expect your baby feed, feed and feed for 3 days. As long as your baby is peeing and weeing and waking up for feeds regularly (at least 8 feeds in 24 hours) all is fine in a baby's world. If you baby is not doing as above your will need to work on milk supply by pumping regularly while topping up with some formula/expressed milk. I know this is all very hard work. Please don't beat yourself up if your decide you can't keep struggling like this anymore. If you decide to persevere I really do think you need to find your local breasfteeding support group as a matter of urgency. I hope it helps

The OP has posted that her DC is in pain from breast feeding and breast milk in a bottle so can’t think how the latch is causing the problem?

Weeing and waking up regularly for feeds isn’t fine in this baby’s world as he is in pain.

Magenta82 · 08/10/2023 12:23

I honestly think that there are a lot of people who are so blinded by their breast is best stance that they haven't bothered to read the OPs posts and are just ignorantly jumping in because of the title.

mollyfolk · 08/10/2023 12:33

Octosaurus · 07/10/2023 13:27

These are all very helpful messages guys thank you so much for your help.

I think the core milk hind milk might be something to do with it. I was told to switch breasts before they get tired by the lactation consultant! I had so much conflicting advice from the professionals it's crazy!

And perhaps it's not diarrhoea but there does seem to be actual yellow liquid alongside the solids that soak into the nappy that isn't there with formula. Perhaps a forenilk issue still.

I will report back! Thank you again

Oh yeah the advice is to feed on a breast until they are done suckling then switch. The tired thing is just bizarre. Are you sore at all?

i am not a breastfeeding fanatic 🤣 but I’d encourage you not to give up at 3 weeks because you’ve put in all the work to establish breastfeeding and if you can figure this out from about 10 weeks breastfeeding is the easiest thing in the world - so convenient.

the yellow frequent poo sounds normal. Breastmilk poo is completely different.

A support group is so helpful. I would not have fed without it.

good luck 🤞