Cost of living. I'm having a meltdown tonight.

[TwentyTwenty20]

I put my heating on for an hour or so this morning because I forgot to dry my son's school uniform, and my landlord won't let me install a tumble dryer. It cost me an extra £2. I didn't put my heating on until January last year. We lived under the duvet until then. I got my son changed under the covers. I used to just get in the bath and stay there in the evening to keep warm. I'm a lone parent, I take home £2100 a month and get £140 UC, £96 child benefit. My rent is £1000 a month. Council tax £150 with SP discount. Electric, gas, petrol, car insurance, Internet, school uniform, food, life insurance, water bills, £130 on before and after school clubs so I can work, then there's failed MOT which I had to put on a credit card which I'm paying off, tv license, phone bill etc. Then there's life and scraping by so my son can continue his gymnastics hes been doing since he was 2. Council is awful and you can't apply for any of the cost of living stuff unless they have 'identified you'. I've done income and expenditure with a professional and they've said I've pretty much cut back as far as I can. They fine tooth combed my bank statements. How is the amount I make not enough? I have applied for 6 cheaper houses in the last month and none will rent to me. I'm 400 and something on the list for council housing. 10 years ago I was on 18k a year and comfortable and saving.

Will this ever get better? That's a genuine question because I can do all the cutting back I can but if I keep getting knocked back for cheaper housing and higher paid jobs I just don't know how I will go on. It is no life and I don't enjoy getting out of bed in the morning anymore.

In the South West that is about the going rate for a 2 bed property.
£1000 a month.
It's not fair. And with interest rates increasing, I'm sure it's only going to push it higher.

Moving to a cheaper area is not as simple, family, support network, jobs and life can impact that.

I hope you're okay OP, I'm sorry this is happening

I’ll be very honest and say I don’t know if the system still works like this but you used to be able to register with social housing providers directly, not just the council.
If you’ve got any new build sites near you they’ll have an element of social housing on them, if you can find out who they are (they usually have boards outside) then ring them and ask how you join the register for the affordable rent units. They are usually 30% lower in rent costs than private renting and the tenancies are much more secure.

Also definitely look at tax free childcare. Plus my DC’s school run before and after school clubs that are cheaper than breakfast and afterschool club, but obviously don’t include food.

Also to add to the rent comments, I live in a more shit part of the midlands and that rent would be the going rate round here too for that type of property. A 2 bed flat would cost you the same.

That sounds awful, I'm so sorry. Only things I can think of are, take in a female lodger, do ironing for people, cleaner as they get paid 20 an hour around here. Cut peoples grass for 20 at the weekends. When you meet a nice partner, their income will really help. I don't think it's possible for people to live on one wage ànymore, because the cost of living is so high.

Double income household here and we are not laughing. Double expenses on many things - food, cars, clothes, toiletries etc. Can’t afford to pay into pension or pay for kids to have swimming lessons. Our mortgage has doubled. Car insurance doubled. It’s very depressing.

https://smarty.co.uk/sim-only#plans

Smarty £6/m phone 5gb data unlimited calls and texts (there is cheaper out there I just like this company)

Emergency assist breakdown currently 19quid per year on Groupon they're great and offer home start etc included

https://www.groupon.co.uk/deals/emergency-assist-6?utm_source=&utm_campaign=UserReferral_ma

Your insurances are v high put them through a comparison site then buy via topcashback.co.uk for more money off (I've made 3k since i started uni for free just by buying stuff i normally buy

Balance transfer ur credit card onto 0% then pay the minimum on that and the rest of the money use to clear your loan as will be higher interest

can u walk cycle more to cut fuel costs?

Check the entitled to website

I literally scour the news all the time for cost of living updates to see if our government have introduced any further help for people like me. Feel incredibly naive each time. That's exactly what I want to know.

How will it get better?
When will it get better?
Will it get better?

Thank you everyone. Will read everything tonight after work.

Probably stating the obvious, but have you tried talking to your landlord about the rent increase not being affordable for you? They might prefer a trustworthy tenant on less rent than taking a chance on a new one if you move out?

It's awful OP. There does seem to be some useful tips on the thread so I hope they can make a difference for you. You will be getting a cost of living payment soon at least, so hopefully that will help a bit for Christmas this year.

I agree with you that I don't know why people aren't taking to the streets. A person like you should not be struggling. You work hard and do not have an extravagant lifestyle. We need to organise our standards in this country so that it's possible to raise a family comfortably on one wage.

They need to raise the local housing allowance to reflect the reality of the rental sector, or somehow force rents to come down.

Small thing but could you be eligible for council tax reduction? This is done separately to UC and not everyone realizes this. You apply through your council.

It sounds like you can’t cut back any more so if I was you I’d try to focus on making more money. What job do you have? Is it possible to ask for a pay rise? Or train in a different field that has higher pay? You could also consider self employment (obviously along side your job initially)
wishing you all the best OP x

Seconding @Chipperfish with the dehumidifier idea. I got one last winter and it dries a full load of laundry in 4-6 hours (slightly more for towels).

I too have a Victorian house that is hard to heat so, when I’m not drying laundry, I leave the dehumidifier on overnight with the internal doors open. It costs 7p per hour to run, and has massively reduced my heating bill (dry air takes less energy to heat than humid air). The house feels cosy, and I no longer get condensation on the windows.

I don’t where you live but it seems cheap to me! 2 bed flats in my development are currently £1400 a month, a family house down the road would be £2200-2500. And no, it’s not anywhere near London.

It’s hard OP, I am in a similar situation but not working as my dd is disabled and needs a lot of care. Luckily my rent is a lot lower as I was lucky to get a housing association house (after years of fighting for one). I do have a tumble dryer but it eats electricity, my heating won’t be going on until it’s really cold. I did get a email to say my electricity costs were going down a little but so far I haven’t really noticed. I often sit down and check my outgoings and see if there’s anything I can sacrifice, we haven’t had sky for the last 8 years, cut back on take aways, switched contract phone to pay as you go (saved £25 a month) and switch internet providers every year to get the best deal.

I feel your pain. It is a disgrace that we are living like this. How can it be that working families now can't provide the basics for themselves and their children. I have just worked my socks off for a promotion and the actual amount that lands in my account after tax is barely any higher than it was before and in real terms I am poorer because of increased bills and mortgage. It absolutely sucks. We should be able to feed our kids nutritious healthy food, keep them warm and well clothed as an absolute basic. Now that is in question. Hobbies which should enrich all children's lives - dance, sport, music, scouting etc - are becoming the preserve of the rich and creating a massive cultural and social as well as economic divide. It all makes me sick. I am so sorry that you are struggling and carrying this mental burden.

It comes to 2140.

Forgot to add his dad earns over 40k a year but works for his friend and declares 16k a year so I get a whopping £7 a week from him

Well there's your answer. If you know what he earns, report it. What he declares and what his bank statements say will be different. It should be impossible for fathers (and it's always the dads isn't it) to avoid their responsibilities this way.

I think you are right that there is no more fat left to cut on your bills. The only thing I'd suggest is looking at Giffgaff for phone, as it would give you an extra £10 a month.

On your list of costs you have £106 loan repayment.
Is there anyway you could reduce this amount ?
Maybe renegotiate a lower payment over a longer period?

Your budget does look tight but, as someone else has already mentioned, you could shave a few pounds off by switching your broadband to a social tariff.

Could you go SIM only on your mobile to cut the cost and keep your current phone. No-one needs to be paying £20 pm these days, you could easily get it down to about £7 pm then for a phone, get a cheaper Android and look for deals. My last two phones have cost £100-150 in Black Friday deals and I've sold my old one for about £60 on ebay, that's after about 3 years, so my mobile cost is about £10 pm in total including a perfectly decent phone and several Gb of data.

Look on Moneysaving Expert and sign up to the weekly newsletter for tips on making extra bits of money, eg switch your bank account every time there's an incentive and you can get £150 - 200 each time. I've done this a few times, so made around £1k. Also look at the Energy Help section - you might be entitled to a grant, as the money you're paying isn't enough to put the heating on properly.

If your credit card is not on a 0% deal, switch to one that is.

You can get slightly cheaper breakdown cover from Autoaid or GEM - it's about £70 but you do have to pay for it all in one go. But it might be worth trying to have a really frugal couple of weeks (little as possible on food, petrol etc) to free up some money to pay for it, to reduce the ongoing cost.

Do you actually need a TV licence? If you don't watch live TV or use iPlayer, you don't. You could get TV using a streaming service, Now TV entertainment is probably the cheapest one, as you can always get a deal to reduce the cost.

On the matter of your DS's father cheating on paying maintenance and taxes you could offer him the choice of reporting him and his mate's firm to HMRC if he doesn't pay the correct amount.

When will the loan stop, this will help quite a bit.

But if you're really struggling and the loan has a way to go, you could look at a formal debt management or even a debt relief order but that would depend on the value of your car not exceeding a certain amount and it would force you to live without credit for some years, so it may be preferable to struggle on so you can maintain access to credit to allow you to do things like get your car fixed when needed.

I agree with you that I don't know why people aren't taking to the streets. A person like you should not be struggling. You work hard and do not have an extravagant lifestyle. We need to organise our standards in this country so that it's possible to raise a family comfortably on one wage

Yes but we also need to make sure that absent parents meet their responsibilities. That's the real reason the OP is struggling. If she got more money from her son's sperm donor, she would be better off.

£100 fuel
£150 Council tax
£130 childcare costs
£20 life insurance
£20 phone bill
£25 Internet
£30 gymnastics
£30 water
£51 car insurance
£50 credit card
£160-£200 food/toiletries/cleaning products/stuff for my empty unfurnished house
£10 breakdown cover
£30 for underpayment of council tax
£5 contents insurance
£106 loan (family court costs - he got no contact so do not regret this)
£13 TV license
£60-70 gas and electric

= £1040 (taking the maximum amounts for food and gas and electric out of the range given).

really? the best you can offer is 'find yourself a man'? and 'take in ironing'?