To think the phrase “tomboy” is outdated?

[weathersweater]

So a girl who doesn’t like wearing dresses, or the colour pink and likes playing football - why can’t she not just be a girl who likes xyz?

Why do we need to categorise likes and interests with having a certain gender attached to them?

'Boy things'? What are these?

Well in some schools in the UK girls are banned from wearing trousers.

Of course there are boy things.

In a school with that policy a girl could wear trousers only if she identifies as a boy.

Society shouldn't be like this but it is. Claiming there are no boy things is wrong.

If you really are unaware of the way society culturally codes a lot of objects and activities as being more suitable for one sex than the other I don’t think there’s much point in you wasting your time on this discussion. You should probably look around for a more basic introduction to the social world.

I think the point here is the question of whether you are knowingly contributing to the boy/girl coding (by embracing and promoting terms like "tomboy') or rejecting the idea that there are inherent boy/girl things and trying to reject the idea that such labels are necessary or desirable.

Sorry, but that's not true. My daughter wasn't a 'girly girl' at school, she never once wore a skirt, used minimal make up and short hair. She was constantly told by classmates that she must be trans or non-binary and more recently when she cut her hair even shorter that she must be a lesbian 🙄
Understandably she is a very confused young women, who has decided she wants nothing to do with any of it and is asexual.
It might not be adults saying this, but it still causes damage.

Sorry, that was a reply to @VivienneDelacroix

People who embrace a term like tomboy aren’t necessarily embracing the coding, they may just be finding their own way through a minefield of social expectation.

This is an issue of parenting or education. Children need guidance. Although I think this is pretty normal teen behaviour. When I was a 15 year old with short hair I was constantly asked if I was a lesbian - it didn't change my sexuality. Annoying, but not damaging.

@partypant I'm sure you know very well what I meant by the phrase and the fact I put it in quote marks should indicate that there is some irony there. It is a fact that colours, sports, hobbies, toys are perceived as being "boy" or "girl". I am not defending that simply referring to it in the context of the OP. I 100% agree that there shouldn't be any such perception, but there is and while a certain vocal section of the twitterati insist that those who like the "boy" things must BE a boy rather than a girl who likes them, I'd rather keep tomboy to denote a girl who is secure as a girl but likes those "boy" things. Ideally it wouldnt be needed.

Now I know you are either not serious or have no idea what you are talking about.

Parents are being criminalised in parts of the Western World for not going along with gender. https://www.independentsentinel.com/father-jailed-in-canada-for-using-incorrect-pronouns/

These are laws that gender ideologues would like to see here and there has been plenty of debate over overreaching schools in this country resulting in interested parties seeking clear guidance.

Parents have been called bigots for not affirming their children's identity even when the Cass review has stated that social transition is not a neutral act.

There are lots of people who are interested (too interested) in trans -ing children. This is the reason for the droves of children who are now identifying as trans.

This is nothing like girls being asked if they were lesbians of the past. Lesbianism is a sexuality not a social contagion.

I like the word tomboy. I may drop it into MN threads in near future just to wind people up.

I was a tomboy when younger, loved hanging out with the boys and could outrun everyone of them.
I think this constantly being offended or trying to find offence over certain words is wearing really thin and so boring.

Slight aside, but I've never understood the word. Tom surely denotes a masculine (from the cat?) as does boy, so why double up the masculine to describe a girl? Tom girl makes more sense, surely?

OMG I've heard everything now 😂👍🏻. FML...

Very outdated imo. It makes me think of George from the Famous Five.

TakeMe2Insanity
This is it though. Now if a girl is a tomboy the immediate conclusion is that she is trans and put on that pathway.

OMG I've heard everything now 😂👍🏻. FML...

Yeah? Obviously you've not seen it happening. I know of one. It's nothing to laugh about, it's actually quite horrific.

Plenty of butch lesbians (essentially adult tomboys) are complaining about being told they're actually closeted trans men too.

I don’t like the term because why should being active and adventurous, preferring jeans to dresses, not wearing make-up, having short hair, spending time being curious over time shopping be associated with being a boy, These are all absolutely normal and healthy activities for girls.

It has fuck all to do with gender identification. I can’t believe some of the stuff on this thread.

Tomboy isn't a gender.

This!

It’s a word, not a phrase.

It was/is a useful way to describe a girl who really didn’t like any girly things. In my DD1’s case that included all trad girls’ toys, baby dolls, Barbies, etc. and she positively hated ever having to wear a dress or skirt.

If she’d been born a few decades later I’m sure some people would have been eager to persuade her that she was born into the wrong body.

As a tomboy I do not find it offensive to use that phrase, I don't need a color on a flag honestly just stop addressing stupid stuff, learn to embrace things at face value, there is no gender identity issues we are just more comfortable in our masculine side enjoy more physical activities we also know how to embrace our feminine side we are the best of 2 worlds, I can cook and sew, fix a car build things, while more comfortable in jeans and a tee I also can and will dress up put make up on, we are men's best friends and lovers

It's perfectly normal to use it. It's not just a girl who doesn't like wearing dresses. It's that she likes stereotypical boyish pursuits.

How do so many old threads get resurrected?

I dunno but I wish AI would learn to punctuate.

@Whoochiemama were you aware that this is an old thread from 2023?