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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask the police why they are on my road?

137 replies

chouxchoux · 01/10/2023 22:12

I’m single and live alone on the ground floor. I live in a very, very quiet area (rural countryside, my village has <500 people in it). Crime rate is very low and I feel safe here. Rarely see or hear of any trouble.

Tonight there is a police car parked right outside my house, behind a civilian car it seems. The lights are flashing on the police car. It’s dark and not street lit so I can’t see much of what’s going on, and my Ring doorbell is out of range to pick up on what they’re saying. Because I’m alone and on the ground floor it’s really freaking me out. It’s been going on for about 40 minutes. Would I BU to contact the non emergency police number and ask what’s going on? I wouldn’t ask for details but even just to know what type of crime they’re here for would maybe (or maybe not) put my mind at ease. I’ve got a busy day at work tomorrow and it’s really stressing me out 😔

OP posts:
ThinWomansBrain · 01/10/2023 23:00

For one police car🙄

The only time I've asked why there were police outside was when they'd used the railings of my balcony to tie the "police, don't cross" signs to, so my home was inside the no-go zone; even then they weren't able to tell me (there were also about a dozen cars and armed police).
turned out someone had been shot on the next corner.

As someone has said above, if the police are there, it's being dealt with - could be anything from making arrest to informing someone about a road accident

Original poster
chouxchoux · 01/10/2023 23:01

GalileoHumpkins · 01/10/2023 22:57

Are they chasing a swan?

Honestly it’s that type of village normally 😅

I’ve just had a look at the local police force FB page and most of the posts over the last few weeks refer to them busting car thefts and off road bikes. Hopefully it’s nothing more sinister than that. 🙏🏼

OP posts:
Original poster
chouxchoux · 01/10/2023 23:07

truecolour · 01/10/2023 22:59

I have zero idea at all why some posters feel able to make such rude comments to others, without stopping to consider someone might be anxious or have anything going on. It’s surely not hard to just be nice or scroll onto another post that interests you more. OP it’s probably not the place to post if you’re feeling anxious

I agree I don’t think they will tell you but you are very safe with police there outside. It means it’s being dealt with. Pretty much like having security out your house! Don’t worry and just go to bed. Switch the channel in your mind. I know it’s hard sometimes! Find a funny reel or video on YouTube to watch. I find the old X factor auditions distracting when I have anxiety lol. Sending hugs to you x

Thank you so much. That’s really kind. I’ve definitely learned not to post on AIBU!

OP posts:
Joeylove88 · 01/10/2023 23:07

I think most of these comments are genuinely quite harsh tbh. There's a difference between being nosey and having genuine anxiety and just needing to know everything is okay for peace of mind. Iv been in a similar situation where a major incident occurred right outside my place of work and it was absolute bedlam outside with ambulances lined up, helicopters, forensics and a film crew and my nerves were completely shattered I could barely carry on with my shift and all I needed was some reassurance (although I was already suffering badly with anxiety before then). Sometimes needing to know information is a desperate attempt to stay calm and get some peace of mind.

LakeTiticaca · 01/10/2023 23:08

I would be out there tapping on their car window 😉

Toddlerteaplease · 01/10/2023 23:12

They won't tell you.

Streamorwatchlive · 01/10/2023 23:13

I don’t think posting on AIBU is your issue as most people just look at active posts. It’s probably the fact that absolutely not one person on here knows the situation and it’s feels like you’re a drama ghoul when literally there’s just one police car by your house

Zonder · 01/10/2023 23:16

Do you know any of your neighbors well? I'd be messaging one because I'd feel a bit stressed by this too.

Original poster
chouxchoux · 01/10/2023 23:22

My neighbour also lives alone and is quite elderly. I can imagine she would be quite frightened by it too so I may give her a call in the morning, but I’m hoping she’s slept through it tbh!

The police car lights stopped flashing and a massive tow truck turned up. Turns out the civilian car was still there and it’s being towed now. I did just go out and have a chat with the policeman as I could see he was on his own and no sign of anyone else except the bloke driving the tow truck. He was fine about me asking, said he understood my anxiety as it’s usually such a quiet village and he said they were seizing the vehicle as it had been reported stolen. So I think I can sleep now 😬😬

OP posts:
RedToothBrush · 01/10/2023 23:23

Quite clearly there is a mass murderer on the loose outside your house. The police haven't told you because they don't want to alarm the locals. But they are stopping cars which aren't registered to the area as a precaution.

Obviously.

As Nick Ross would say "Don't have nightmares".

Streamorwatchlive · 01/10/2023 23:31

My neighbour also lives alone and is quite elderly. I can imagine she would be quite frightened by it

you imagine do you? Perhaps she quite rightly doesn’t care there’s ONE police car on her road.

He was fine about me asking, said he understood my anxiety as it’s usually such a quiet village

pretty sure you’re 101 in how to deal with nosey neighbours.

and after all that, it was nothing, quelle surprise

DreamTheMoors · 01/10/2023 23:32

This reminds me — they use police helicopters here in California to chase the bad guys from overhead.
Once years ago, late at night, my roommate and I heard the helicopter flying very low over our house - we went outside in our nightgowns to see what was happening, and this happened:

”GO BACK IN THE HOUSE” came from the helicopter’s loudspeaker. It scared us to death. We never found out who they were chasing. Lol

Original poster
chouxchoux · 01/10/2023 23:35

Stream you’re very invested in this situation/my failings aren’t you? I’m not sure why you’re so committed to being on the attack. It’s really odd. Hopefully now you can find another thread to be so unpleasant on - all the best

OP posts:
CherrySocks · 01/10/2023 23:37

I don't know why people are responding rudely and harshly.
I'm sure the police are used to local people asking what's happening.
It's expected that people will be worried and also concerned.

saltinesandcoffeecups · 01/10/2023 23:39

CherrySocks · 01/10/2023 23:37

I don't know why people are responding rudely and harshly.
I'm sure the police are used to local people asking what's happening.
It's expected that people will be worried and also concerned.

Because, if someone is actively dealing with the police it’s likely already a bad situation and they don’t need looky loos wandering in to satisfy their curiosity or the police are doing their job and don’t need to spend time satisfying curiosity.

MatthewsMumFromTikTok · 01/10/2023 23:42

A stolen car?

Wonder where the thieves are hiding.... have you checked your shed or garage?

And the loft.....

billybear · 01/10/2023 23:46

my friends dog woke her a few weeks ago middle of the night, she looks out of the window to see armed police pointing guns on a man on the floor,she phoned 999 to ask what was going on they told her dont worry the police are handling it,,

Streamorwatchlive · 01/10/2023 23:46

Stream you’re very invested in this situation/my failings aren’t you? I’m not sure why you’re so committed to being on the attack. It’s really odd. Hopefully now you can find another thread to be so unpleasant on - all the best

not on the attack. Commenting on a thread you posted. You can’t dictate who responds and whether they agree with you. As a 70+ Yr old I think it’s unpleasant to suggest someone who is ‘elderly’ must be frightened as justification for your post when really it’s just nosiness. Own it.

Blinky21 · 01/10/2023 23:48

We often have a police helicopter hovering over our garden or street in the early hours, weirdly I really like the sound of it and just imagine they are chasing car theives

Womencanlift · 01/10/2023 23:48

Sounds like it wasn’t anything that serious but maybe this is an opportunity to do something about your anxiety as that doesn’t sound like a healthy response to the emergency services being on your street

Flip it round. Imagine you were the one that called the police, or they had come to your home to give you the worse news possible, how would you feel if the neighbourhood curtain twitcher was outside asking what was going on and potentially taking them away from whatever it was you had phoned them for

MatthewsMumFromTikTok · 01/10/2023 23:48

Urban myth about the 'elderly being frightened' they are far more robust than the 20 something snowflakes of today!

Original poster
chouxchoux · 01/10/2023 23:49

Streamorwatchlive · 01/10/2023 23:46

Stream you’re very invested in this situation/my failings aren’t you? I’m not sure why you’re so committed to being on the attack. It’s really odd. Hopefully now you can find another thread to be so unpleasant on - all the best

not on the attack. Commenting on a thread you posted. You can’t dictate who responds and whether they agree with you. As a 70+ Yr old I think it’s unpleasant to suggest someone who is ‘elderly’ must be frightened as justification for your post when really it’s just nosiness. Own it.

Interesting, in a post you wrote last night you say you’re a “mid 40s gamer mum”!

OP posts:
Original poster
chouxchoux · 01/10/2023 23:51

MatthewsMumFromTikTok · 01/10/2023 23:48

Urban myth about the 'elderly being frightened' they are far more robust than the 20 something snowflakes of today!

I know my neighbour well thanks - there are reasons for me to feel tonight might have distressed her.

OP posts:
MatthewsMumFromTikTok · 01/10/2023 23:52

Is the entire street riddled with anxiety?

Streamorwatchlive · 01/10/2023 23:53

I know my neighbour well thanks - there are reasons for me to feel tonight might have distressed her

oh those secret reasons?! Was her ex a car thief?

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