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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is it weird to stand outside a school at 3pm if I don’t have a child?

226 replies

Whatislifegw · 07/09/2023 15:35

Before you think I’m crazy! I have a dog who I want to expose to loud and busy environments and live very close to a school.

would it be weird to just stand or sit near the school at that time for my dog to work on being in that environment.

my dog is a very friendly and 6 month old German shepherd because he’s so big I want him to be able to behave around strangers and strange children.

(I have my own toddler who wouldn’t be with me) ideally in a few years I’d like to be able to do the school run when it’s my turn and bring my dog at the same time.

OP posts:
Greensleeves · 07/09/2023 15:52

It doesn't sound as though you've given a great deal of thought to the children and parents who will have to walk past your excitable and unreliable German Shepherd on their way in and out of school.

I think it's a terrible idea, and rather selfish of you to have come up with it at all. The general public aren't props in your fur baby's journey Confused

lemonyellows · 07/09/2023 15:52

Be aware that lots of small children are fearful of dogs. Mine were. I wouldn't have appreciated them getting upset about the presence of a dog merely to train them.

PRAMtran · 07/09/2023 15:54

I’m not a fan of taking an untrained dog or any dog infact to parkrun. The number of times I’ve had to take evasive action to stop myself from being tripped by a dog and or it’s leash is massive.

N3philim · 07/09/2023 15:56

I wish more people trained their dogs properly, which includes not reacting to, and running towards children. I have always trained mine towers this. Yes, some children are scared of dogs but a well trained dog teaches them that their fear might be misplaced. I think you are doing a great job trying to train your dog, and I would likewise suggest walking it past the school instead of waiting outside it.

Alwaystired2023 · 07/09/2023 15:56

This whole thread is so funny I love it

Overthebow · 07/09/2023 15:59

I wouldn’t use young children as a training tool for your dog.

Thriving30 · 07/09/2023 16:05

"I’ll probably just do a dog walk around 3pm one day without stopping I just wanted to work on him ignoring people and children"
This wouldn't be a place to do it.. I imagine you'll get lots of children trying to stroke the dog, which will just make it awkward for everyone.. especially if you're training your dog to ignore them?
Your post doesn't really make sense. As others have said, try a busy town centre on a Saturday lunchtime if you want to practice distraction training.

WrongWayApricot · 07/09/2023 16:07

I've suspected people do this at our school and I hate it. Sometimes the dogs bark at and chase the children. Surely there are other crowded places to visit.

Verityenglisheducator · 07/09/2023 16:10

I have two dogs myself so can sympathise with the need to socialise them. However, as a parent to a young child, I would be very concerned about seeing a young, excitable, large dog near the school. Children will approach dogs for a stroke, even if told to ask first, and a young GS could be unpredictable. There are lots of less risky ways to socialise your dog I'd say.

Foxesandsquirrels · 07/09/2023 16:11

A school is such a random and inappropriate place for this. There's so many places that are loud and have lots of people.

BotanicalNames · 07/09/2023 16:17

Don't use other people's little kids to unknowingly socialise your dog - there must be a better way to do this.

MotherEarthisaTerf · 07/09/2023 16:21

Loads of responses already but walking around at 8.30am and 3.30pm will catch lots of children walking on way to and from school. Assuming all behaviour is fine you can walk near a school during lunch time.

You're best off not "stopping and waiting" with a dog as they'll learn that some behaviour gets action - if they're on a lead they want to be moving so standing still and waiting could lead to gradually trying more things until you give up and move on. You can train it into the dog if you're not careful.

Noise on youtube is very good to desensitise - look at Victoria Stillwell for info on how to use sound desensitisation. You should be able to get a video for children playing, fireworks, bin collections etc etc.

cheddercherry · 07/09/2023 16:23

I’m sure many little kids (at least the ones I know) would be wary of a large barking dog so not sure they’d appreciate coming nose to nose with that outside of school (especially if they’ve just started and haven’t even settled into school yet).

I’m sure other dog owners can suggest other ways to socialise your dog which don’t involve other people and their kids as test subjects. Also our local village schools don’t allow dogs even outside the gates for drop offs and pick ups so it might not even be possible to get close to school.

IDontDrinkTea · 07/09/2023 16:23

You’re saying when your toddler is older, you want to take the dog on the school run… my children’s school ban this, as do most schools I know.

Children and strange dogs are not usually the best mix

Brendabigbaps · 07/09/2023 16:24

The amount of kids ( and adults) who will approach your dog will surprise you. If your not 110% sure of his reactions your playing a dangerous game.
school kick out is a noisy affair, I can imagine it will be overwhelming for a dog who isn’t used to it.

Timeforabiscuit · 07/09/2023 16:27

Have you considered that some of the children, and adults, may be very uncomfortable around dogs?

Our local primary schools policy is no dogs at the school gate because of the disruption and congestion at the school gate with dog leads, scooters, zombified parents, pushchairs and children in various stages of excitement all competing for pavement space

SoftSheen · 07/09/2023 16:28

It's not a great idea. Some children (and parents) are scared of dogs, others may run over and wrap their arms around his neck, toddlers may randomly poke a dog in the eye. Even if none of this happens, you are likely to be in the way. At the very least, keep a respectful distance.

MasterBeth · 07/09/2023 16:29

"Please can I stand outiside a school with my big scary dog?"

It's a no from me.

CuriousW · 07/09/2023 16:30

Socialising your dog is important, but I would suggest standing/sitting outside the supermarket or train station if you have one nearby.

ittakes2 · 07/09/2023 16:30

caerdydd12 · 07/09/2023 15:38

How close to the school are you?

I'll be honest having a big, young dog around lots of children in a busy environment when you're saying he isn't used to this sounds bonkers. Getting a dog used to lots of noise and busy scenes is one thing, immersing him around lots of children when he isn't used to it is another entirely. I say this as an owner of a grumpy dog.

This

Original poster
Whatislifegw · 07/09/2023 16:31

Thanks for the feedback I didn’t realize how unpopular this would be.

I won’t be doing it but just to add some context

my dog is trained we regularly go to events garden centres and spend time around adults and children as I said it would just be working on being calm eg sitting and laying down when people come up / say hello or walk past

it’s also a lot easier to walk 2 mins outside my house for a busy environment than go to a town centre.

my dog would not be barking Lol

I would not have been standing in the middle of all the children being picked up or by gates of any sort I wouldn’t been far out the way

it seems like a lot of people have had negative experiences which I completely understand but as a dog owner I want my dog to be absolutely perfectly behaved around children

OP posts:
DonnaTellMeThis · 07/09/2023 16:31

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

kay3 · 07/09/2023 16:32

Please don't plan to take your dog on the school run when the time comes. Some children and adults are petrified of dogs

Walkaround · 07/09/2023 16:32

Dreadful idea. You might find your details have been circulated to every school in the area, warning them to be alert to a potential safeguarding risk, otherwise known as the weird stranger matching your description who was seen loitering near the school at the end of the day for no apparently good reason!

Bettyboobaloo · 07/09/2023 16:33

Please don't. They are dispised at our school. Why on earth do ppl need to bring their dogs! They fight and kick off without warning. Your pup won't miss out. Why not go to a local footie match?