AIBU to think 👍 is rude

[SowhoamI505]

When texting, my pet peeve is use of 👍, is this just me who finds it rude? To explain why I find use of it rude, it’s been used in response to questions and some other situations like sharing a photo.

Would you prefer a ✔️ instead?

It certainly would mean exactly that if I ever found myself in the unfortunate position of corresponding with someone so over-sensitive and needy that they choose to be offended by someone acknowledging them and agreeing.

It’s a real world gesture with a real world meaning. If we are going to have to assign contrary meanings to everything in the online sphere (based on a seemingly generational misunderstanding or misappropriation) then yes UABU. Just let it be a thumbs up.

In Bangladesh the👍is the equivalent of the two finger reverse peace sign so is extremely rude.

It's really context dependent.

I've seen people use it passive aggressively when they think what you've typed is ridiculous and they cannot be arsed to continue with the conversation, and I've also seen it used to agree to something.

I've used both, perhaps the former more than the latter, but mainly because the partner of one of my friends loves argument baiting in our group chats.

Looking through my messages, the latest 👍 I see in the group chat was actually a substitute for "LOL if you say so".

I use it all the time. Now I’m paranoid 🫤

Why is it rude? I use it all the time, just a way of saying okay!

I don't get why it's considered rude.

"See you tomorrow"
"Yes, I'll get it"
"£13"
"Thanks" etc.

All of which a thumbs up can be a perfectly good way of saying "yes, I've seen your text, and that's fine by me."
Loads of people use it for replies to me and I refuse to believe any of them mean it rudely.

It’s rude if it ignores a question but someone sends a photo and the response is a thumbs up, that’s a pleasant acknowledgment. What more do you need?

A big thumb is definitely not always a positive. Some people use it in a straight forward way to signal approval- those who don't get nuance in conversation usually, but some use it to indicate other things.

I often use it to end a conversation that's gone on too long, or sometimes I use it when I know someone wants me to gush over their photo and I really don't want to- it can be a sarcastic thumbs up!. For example I have a friend who sends me lots of pictures of her and clearly expects me to compliment her a lot and say how beautiful they are when they are just clingy and annoying so I just give them a big thumbs up instead- which means 'yeah, great' in a sarcastic tone.

If I wanted to be rude to someone I'd BE rude to them, I wouldn't bother faffing about with an emoji that they might, or might not, find offensive.

Nope.

Just means yes/ok/agreed.

This, 100%.

It can either be a pleasant “great” or a really passive aggressive way to shut down a conversation.

It can be used sarcastically in real life too.

You just know that anyone who finds 👍 rude is hard work.

Depends. Do you and your friends find thumbs up rude? If so - then YaNbu. In our world it just means yes.

@Janieforever

How busy would you need to me that you can’t write a few letters

But why do you need to type out letters to recognise acknowledgement of something simple when you don’t have to?

As PPs have said if someone says they are really upset and wants to talk it would be rude.

But if someone types: “see you at eight”, why is it necessary to type: “yes, see you at eight”? When you can type 👍?

“See you at eight” isn’t especially poetic, nuanced, polite or life enhancing. It adds little that a emoji can’t. I find it bizarre that anyone would be put out at that.

When has a thumbs up ever been rude?

Completely depends on the context but I definitely think it can be. I've had this exact conversation with DH who thinks I'm mad. We've also consulted friends about it who were all on his side so I guess we're in the minority!

Most of the time it's fine and personally I do use it a lot in the positive way it's intended, but my issue with it is when it's used on its own to shut down a conversation or as a bit of a "that's nice dear" non-response.

It can be used sarcastically in real life too.

But so can thank you, well done, amazing, etc.

I have a friend who was a journalist in Iran. He had to flee the country because his newspaper was suppressed by the authorities. He spoke no English at the time and had to travel on false papers on a long circuitous route to claim asylum here. All he had was a note, written by a colleague which said “I wish to claim asylum. My travel documents are false but if you bring a translator (I speak Farsi) I can explain.” The immigration officer studied this, looked at my friend, smiled and gave him the thumbs up. My friend’s heart almost stopped as in Iran that gesture means “Stick it up your arse”.

Busy enough that you can’t proof read a short post? I dunno…

It's just an acknowledgement to me. Doesn't have a deeper meaning.

A couple of my colleagues at work used it in final responses to things in emails like ‘great, see you at 10.’ Initially, I thought it was weird but then started doing it. Now I’m re-thinking. Don’t want people to think I’m rude!

Which could almost be polite! Much better than saying "why are you telling me this?", "I'm really not interested" "You're boring" "The dress/hair do is hideous"

Sharing a photo of your new hair do and getting a thumbs up in return is fucking brutal 😂😂😂😂😂

I'm in the 👍is rude camp. The reason some of us feel this is because nobody does a 👍in real life, unless they're being sarcastic to the annoying kid in class. It's slightly odd and dismissive to add that in texts with no context.