To insist DP brushes her teeth before bed

[BarchesterTowels]

So my DP, who is 36, has a slightly weird metabolism. She doesn't get tired gradually like most people, she just announces that she needs to go to bed, puts on her PJs, then passes out two minutes later. It's as if she'd drunk a bottle of gin, except she doesn't drink (anything, ever). The problem is, she never brushes her teeth first. This really bothers me as I was brought up to brush my teeth twice a day morning and night, and I worry what it's doing to her teeth. Her last checkup was fine, but it can't be good, surely? I'd hate to go to sleep with dirty teeth. Recently I've started gently suggesting that she could include a quick bathroom visit before bed, but she just points out that she has no fillings and says this proves there's no need. I think her lack of a bedtime brushing regime is minging, but AIBU?

Oh I thought this was going to be about her breath and her expecting a kiss with day old breath.

But it isn't. It's just what you think js right. Meh. Her teeth her choice.

YABU to insist as it’s up to her what she does.

YANBU to suggest it, and YWNBU to decide that you don’t want to share a bed with someone who doesn’t brush their teeth.

Well really you don't have to brush before bed, you should brush after your last food/drink. So why don't you suggest she does her teeth after dinner? I have started doing my skin care after dinner, as part of the 'whip round and tidy everything up' vibe, and I have to say it's been transformational! I always did my teeth just before bed (do agree with you it's a bit minging not to) but often couldn't be arsed with skincare...

Bit weird that her putting her PJs on routine doesn’t include brushing her teeth.

Yeah I think it's a bit grim. It would bother me. But not much you can do if you've suggested it and she's not interested.

Of course you can't insist what someone does with their own body.

I couldn’t sleep with bad breath exhaling in the bedroom all night. Just ask her if she’s willing to brush her teeth a half hour after eating dinner.

When I'm trying not to snack in the evenings, I brush my teeth after dinner then only drink water. If she did that it wouldn't matter that she goes cm straight to bed

It would seem sensible if she started brushing her teeth about an hour after her evening meal. Perhaps she might not manage it every time if her sleepiness is such that she may suddenly become tired at 8pm but surely more often than not they’d be sorted?

Would someone actually have bad breath at the end of a day? Mot minty fresh surely, but bad?

They would after a few hours of sleeping with unbrushed teeth.

Yes, that is grim and would bother me.

Yes it's weird not to clean your teeth before bed.

I seem to remember my dentist telling me that plaque etc only starts to build up after 24 hours, so theoretically if people absolutely meticulously cleaned their teeth extremely thoroughly once every 24 hours their teeth would be fine. Dentists advise twice a day as most people wouldn't clean their teeth that well so it's best to do them twice in 24 hours.