Children touching things in charity shops

[Nih]

I took my children charity shopping today, we went to a different area, it's an "affluent" area according to google. Dulwich.

The DC like to pick up and have a proper look at the toys they're interested in buying which I don't think is unreasonable. How else would you know whether something works?

DD (4) liked the look of a spinning top and wanted to see what it did. Before she even had chance to push the lever down she was told off by the woman behind the till because "those toys are to be sold, not played with"

We put it back and left the shop so they lost that sale.

5 minutes down the road we had another frosty reception at another charity shop.

AIBU to think the children did nothing wrong and it's perfectly acceptable to handle and even try out toys in charity shops? Obviously not opening packaging etc but loose things on shelves.

It all felt very snob-like.

Ah I love this so much.

That is charity shop management done well 🙂

I've always been a huge fan of charity shops and have vast experience working in them over the years. There was always a queen bee running the show or trying to. and it wasn't usually the manager.
A certain age seemed to be the worst, sexist maybe, but I'm that age so I don't really care. Grumbles at kids looking at toys, hover around certain types of shopper and quite sniffy at the till.
I heard such a person the other day ask someone wanting to buy an large ornament say sniffly "It is £7.50 you know." The would be buyer replied " I know, but as you are so condescending I'm not buying it now." and walked out.

I work in a charity shop.

Some (not all) parents & children take the piss. Taking everything out of the baskets, causing obstructions by sitting on the floor, not putting things back etc. It got so annoying that we decided to remove all batteries and now anything that needs them has a little sticker on it that says 'ask at counter for testing batteries'. Of course, all this happens while the parent/s browse the clothes or books. We've even had to put a sign asking parents to supervise their children.

There is 'trying out' toys and there is turning yourself into a trip hazard. Perhaps you think I'm being OTT? However, if someone was to injure themselves tripping over an errant child or a scattered toy, it's our little shop who could get sued. It would literally be taking food out of the cat's bowls.

Many of the parents and children who visit our shop are an absolute delight though, I must make that clear.

No. You should have explained or shown how it works. Children should look and not touch just like any other shop. Yabu.

Now to be fair, it is perfectly possible for children to touch without making a nuisance of themselves. Often needs parental input though.

Unfortunately if google reviews are to be believed then the male manager is even worse than the lady we encountered today. The poor reviews stem back years too.

Did it look like your children might choose something to buy or were just playing? Were you off looking at the dresses and left them with the toys. Not sure why you'd want to give a bad review of the shop as its the charity that needs the money not the shop assistants. Shame it was a bad experience.

Ours is super friendly. It also is FREE! Yup, everything is completely free if you need it, and they just have a donation box for you to choose how much to donate.
They make enough money this way as they say those who can donate higher usury if priced, and those that genuinely can’t then get things they really need for nothing or a very small donation. They also have a food area.
Every time I have been in to donate items or let Ds choose a toy it’s full of staff and visitors having coffee, kids snack on free food, and play with toys for hours if they like whilst parents relax or look at clothing etc.

Who the hell goes on Google to review a charity shop??

Our local charity shop is adjoined to a cafe. They let the children play with the toys in a part of the cafe whilst you have a coffee. Obviously we always buy one or two of them to take home as well. So, not all charity shops mind you playing with the toys and I really can't see a problem with it as long as you take care of them.

At the end of the day these aren't new toys and I personally give to charity for our things to get some more use / love rather than ending up in the tip. So that's exactly what's happening!

My daughter absolutely loves charity shops 😂
She's learnt she can get much more with her pocket money if it's been previously loved .
She always looks makes sure it's all there and works but gosh some kids trash the shelves and leave toys all over the floor (while the parents browse oblivious to the mess).
So yes try things and the volunteers should know who's being parented and who's not!

Like any other shop?

I have been into hundreds of shops over the years and not one, other than these two charity shops today, have had a problem with children handling toys.

We bought a soft toy from Sainsburys last week, found for us by an employee who showed us where it was, and he didn't give a toss that DS took it off the shelf.

Insert the dozens of other charity shops we've gone into over the past year. Nope, they didn't care about the toys being handled either.

So can you tell me, if you will, why shops selling brand new merchandise don't mind small children taking a closer look at the toys but these charity shops do?

Those of us who are unhappy about an employees attitude.

If enough people complain they might do something about their staff.

Who the hell goes on Google to review a charity shop??
Nih does.

I'm on the fence with this OP, I've seen children break things in charity shops, and then parents complain about broken items....yes really! And that's the issue, some people are piss takers and ruin it for other parents who are vigilant with their kids and if anything did get damaged, they'd pay for the object. And whilst it's not great being rude to the customer some people struggle with interpersonal skills, and don't deliberately mean to be rude.

I work in one, whilst we do let kids touch things, unfortunately parents use us like a stay and play and tong clear up after their kids, it's a nightmare. We've taken to sealing things with cling film if they have multiple parts. Then there's the removing from sets and hiding the toy elsewhere in the store. If parents actually intervened and stopped their children making a mess then volunteers may be kinder

I am guessing this could be a charity shop that's connected to a hospice..?

My kids prefer charity shops to new toy shops because they can try before we buy. It's a great way to encourage a habit of reuse and the value of buying pre-loved. The shops round me are fortunately really welcoming.

Well, no. Which is probably why they are cautious.

People try it on with charity shops.

I think OP is completely showing themselves up and they definitely are ‘that’ parent with their darling children. It didn’t take long for the ‘the charity shop workers are snobs’ to come out which I was just waiting for.

I’d also question if the person you’re trying to get sacked was an employee, most are volunteers apart for the manager themselves.

I live locally and I know what shop you’re talking about, it’s easing funds for a local hospice. They regularly get people in who let their children run riot, ‘try’ the toys, leave them all over the floors, break them, whilst the parent leaves them too it and looks around.

If you haven’t guessed I don’t think the shop / person did anything wrong and I’m sure they’ll be glad you’re not visiting again.

Employee?

Or volunteer giving up their time in the hope of helping an organisation close to their heart, but instead getting grief from members of the public who think the charity exists for their personal benefit?

So can you tell me, if you will, why shops selling brand new merchandise don't mind small children taking a closer look at the toys but these charity shops do?

For Sainsbury's, writing off damaged stock will barely have a perceptible impact on their profitability.

For a charity, it could have a significant impact on their ability to break even, let alone raise money for the cause.

For Sainsbury's, you were dealing with an employee with no emotional investment in the organisation.

For a charity, you are dealing with people who have probably chosen a charity that has an emotional connection to them - often due to bereavements. It's therefore much more personal if a succession of "customers" trash the stock and prevent the charity raising money for that cause.

Charity shop volunteers will often be aware of how well their individual shop is doing (or not). They will know how much stock gets written off after customers damage it or steal it.

Slating them on the internet is completely unnecessary and disproportionate.

YANBU.

What sense does it even make that I can try on a dress or ten but my DS can't open a children's book or "run" a plastic horse on the shelf. It does suck to be a child. 🤷

Why does it matter that it's a charity shop? I was raised never to touch anything in a shop as a kid "you can look but you can't touch". Y'all are calling the people in the shop "snobs" but it's kinda "snobby" of you to think you can let Ur kids touch things in shops were poor people buy things but not expensive shops. I'm sure it's easy to feel like your kids should be the exception but if everyone let their kids touch things they'd all be broken/trashed/covered in snot and dribble.

Give it a rest will you. I have sang the praises of the majority of charity shops I've been in, did you miss those posts or just choose not to take any notice of them because they contradict your point?

Yes, I was left wondering whether our experiences today were linked to snobbery as like I continue to say.. we've never had this problem anywhere else.

I decided to venture into an "affluent area" with a view to get some higher end items and this is the reception we get.

Also, I don't think you do know the shop I'm talking about as if you did you'd know there's nowhere near enough of the shop dedicated to toys and children's things to make what you're describing possible.

It's not St Christopher's which is clearly what you think, it's mind down at the end opposite the pub on the corner.

They had one short shelf with 4 or 5 lonely children's toys on it. No children's clothes.

if everyone let their kids touch things they'd all be broken/trashed/covered in snot and dribble.

I think you'd find that most children's toys in charity shops have been through that many times already and by multiple generations sometimes 😁
Do you even shop in charity shops if any sort of washable snot bothers you?!
I mean multiple human (and probably animal) arses have sat on my second-hand Duresta sofa... 🤔

A friendly tip: avoid M&S (new) underwear if dribble is bothersome. There's some weird stuff that goes on in their unisex changing rooms.

I volunteer in a charity shop and we don’t have a problem with children touching the toys. Ime most parents are very good at keeping their children away from anything breakable in the bric section. If a child did break something I would be more concerned about child cutting themselves than the broken item.