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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Poor Mark Watson…

127 replies

PaperLanterns · 29/08/2023 16:52

…driven to near suicide after his wife found out about his 3 YEAR AFFAIR just after giving birth because his job wasn’t going well…

Appreciate it’s the DM but surely being a shit to your wife shouldn’t be used to promote your current career?

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-12456509/amp/Comedian-Mark-Watson-cheating-wife.html

Comedian Mark Watson says he cheated on his wife after career lows

The Bristol comedian's memoir, Mortification: Eight Deaths and Life After Them, details how he began having an affair when his comedy career began to falter.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-12456509/amp/Comedian-Mark-Watson-cheating-wife.html

OP posts:
AlienatedChildGrown · 30/08/2023 20:24

I suspect the sympathy is lacking because after he exploded his marriage (an affair of three years will do that) it's become about his feelings in the fallout.

Who else’s feelings should his memoir be about though ?

He has to earn a living. He has children to support as well as his own self. His comedy work mostly dried up, or stopped paying so well. He can write. He picked memoir given he had recently been through some “interesting times”.

If he leaves out the parts that make him look awful he risks the press revealing them, but if he leaves them in he is monetising them. The latter still looks more appealing than risking a red top expose to me. At least you have some kind of control over when these bad deeds come under a spotlight. From the link above I got the impression he was now on good terms with his ex-wife and involved in his children’s lives. Which means presumably he ran it past her, if not get her actual blessing.

People do shitty, shitty things. They use suicide not only to emotionally blackmail, they also perform it successfully, in the most gruesome way, with an unsuspecting audience selected for lifelong trauma via witnessing it. But, so far based on the reviews and the new stories I read, his account of coming uncomfortably close to suicide is not one of exerting control or punishing with “look what you made me do!”. It seems to be much more along the lines of I’ve achieved nothing but hurt and pain for the people I was supposed to protect from the world.

I’ve experienced the pain of spousal and parental infidelity. I’d pick being punched in the face repeatedly over ever feeling that pain again. If nothing else broken bones and bruises heal much much faster than a wounded soul. If it hurts so intensely to be on that end of it, what might be the weight of the guilt at having inflicted that on your wife and children ? It’s so destructive it may feel impossibly heavy for some people.

I’m not sure I’d feel the same way about his book were I still so near the pain of infidelity. But I’ve had a lot of time to process it. So I’m at a point where any life that can be saved, any hope that can be spread, any “you are not alone” that can proffered, has to be better than not.

SequinsandStiIettos · 30/08/2023 21:37

He picked memoir
Exactly. He did have a choice given he was initially asked to write a book about his experience as a comic/the comedy world. He could have kept it to that rather than weaving in a death theme.

From what I've read on Audible (they have an offer atm but I've already had a free trial in the last 12 months), it's not strictly autobiographical, comic or self-help as such but a hodgepodge of them all/shifts tonally. Mark himself is selling it as "a bit memoir/a bit self-help/a work in progress but a darker proposition than most."

You reap what you sow - the daily mail headline this afternoon was not optimal for his family. You may consider him open/honest/brave. Others might think differently. I've no idea how his ex feels about his work. I'd still be unhappy with his moaning on stage after our divorce (when I knew he'd cheated on me while pregnant) but that's projecting. I think many call into question the integrity of anyone who can do that. As for an impossibly heavy burden of guilt - not so heavy you can't keep up the deceit for three years and mention your tough divorce in your act. It's somewhat egotistical but we can agree to disagree.

I haven't read the book so not sure how helpful it will be to others: the Guardian reviewer took something from it.
For me, comedians' autobiographies sometimes tend to be fan fodder/Xmas cash grab/ toilet books/self-indulgent purging. I've been given for Xmas...Peter Kay/Frankie Boyle/Russell Brand/David Mitchell/Jonathan Ross/Sue Perkins/Graham Norton/Frank Skinner and Simon Amstell's. Some fare better than others.

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