Page 12 | I’ve withdrawn from organ donation register

Purpledogcollar · 2023-08-28T21:04:21+00:00

I give blood and have always been very pro organ donation. Sadly I have just withdrawn as protest against reproductive organ donation. I can’t support it and am very conflicted as would like to donate other organs. What are your views and is it a hasty decision (although not sure I would change my mind).

stbrandonsboat · 29/08/2023 00:03

Squiblet · 29/08/2023 00:00

The NHS employs 1.25 million full-time staff in England alone.

Are "they" all conspiring together to do crime, lie to the public, concoct scandals and feather their own nests?

Or is it only the top tier of, say, several hundred thousand executives? Their secret conspiratorial meetings must be epic!

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No, I was thinking along the lines of casual dismissal of people's choices tbh.

IvorTheEngineDriver · 29/08/2023 00:04

Your decision is your decision OP, but since you asked me for my opinion, I think YABU. I don't see why some organs are different from others.

PhantomUnicorn · 29/08/2023 00:04

FTR, even if you donate your whole body to science, its still anyones guess if they can take it because of what happens in the circumstances of your death, and your organs health.

one of my family did and they were refused on the grounds they'd attempted resuscitation and the drugs used rendered their body unusable

Longagonow96 · 29/08/2023 00:04

CrappyBarbara · 28/08/2023 23:46

Are you inside my brain? You have written exactly what I think but so much more powerfully than I could have. I honestly think a lot of the militant posters on here think this is a game. It’s all about the sisterhood, “their side/our side” and who can make the most disgustingly hateful comments without getting banned. No doubt OP was SO proud of herself for coming up with this absurd stance. She must be shocked to get so many replies from people who actually place the real well-being of real people over the made-up hypothetical fiction she dreamt up for the purpose of this thread.

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Ay-men!

TheChosenTwo · 29/08/2023 00:06

As a relative of someone desperately running out of time waiting for a new heart I’m up for anyone taking anything they want from me. No use to me when I’m dead.
I’d accept one in an instant for me and my dc so it would hardly be right for me to refuse anything of mine.

Bawdrip · 29/08/2023 00:06

Moonface31 · 28/08/2023 23:51

I've opted out, due to the idea that a meat eater would get my organs and spend the rest of their lives devouring animals and murdering hundreds of innocent creatures that didn't ask to be killed. Personal preference.

This is such a good point. Everyone is talking about recipients as though they are all good people deserving of this and contributing to the world and aren't you awful for denying them life. But what if a bit of you ends up in a rapist? Or even just a leery old man who wanks over his neighbour, or a homophobic nut job, or the Boris Johnsons of the world, or the Lucy Letbys etc. There are so many people I'd be happy to have my heart, but equally there's a shit tonne of people I'd rather die than get any piece of me. My personal preference now is to keep kidneys, lungs, pancreas and liver on the list, but ive taken heart and corneas off because I just can't bear the thought of ending up in the 'wrong sort' of person. And I don't care if that makes you furious. It's my body.

Longagonow96 · 29/08/2023 00:07

PhantomUnicorn · 28/08/2023 23:35

I've been here for 17 years, and honestly.. i'm clinging to the voices who think the same as you.

I'm disgusted by how far people will let their prejudice and bigotry take them.... apparently now into potentially signing the death certificates of people on the transplant list.

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Ah, but trans people might not get something. That makes it all worthwhile. Contemptible.

echt · 29/08/2023 00:08

Elphame · 29/08/2023 00:03

Quite - this is the reality of post transplant life for a significant proportion and conveniently glossed over by those who seek to use emotional blackmail on those of use who disagree with their opinion.

If anything this tread has confirmed my decision that opting out of being a donor is absolutely right for me.

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So you think the qualified nature of life after transplant is being ignored by those in support of transplants?

What a weaselly reason to drag in. Shame on you.

Tacocatgoatcheesepizza · 29/08/2023 00:09

Elphame · 29/08/2023 00:03

Quite - this is the reality of post transplant life for a significant proportion and conveniently glossed over by those who seek to use emotional blackmail on those of use who disagree with their opinion.

If anything this tread has confirmed my decision that opting out of being a donor is absolutely right for me.

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If people want to refuse organs on the basis they don’t want to risk complications from a transplant then they are free to say no. But seeing as there is already a shortage of organs I think we can assume that many people at least want to try, and I would most definitely rather give someone that option to choose for themselves instead of deciding for them that their life after transplant might not be good enough for me.

Thelnebriati · 29/08/2023 00:09

The entire donation system needs an overhaul. Consent matters in other areas of medical care so why not this one?
I'm a fairly rare blood group and there's no good reason for me to take blood from the blood bank. I can't donate to others but why can't I donate my blood for my own use?I'm off the donor register so tried to donate my body to my consultant; but my NOK object and have said they can and will overrule my wishes. Either way in the end I'll get no say about how my corpse is used.The system doesn't work the way you think it does, and new developments are bringing changes that you will have no control over. There's no good reason for any of this.

Alargeoneplease89 · 29/08/2023 00:09

I really don't understand the fuss about reproductive organs being donated?

In the end of the day, once you are dead, does it matter? Only biological women can have reproductive organs or am I missing something?

I have known several people who have had/ needed transplants I met them as I have a condition that may need a transplant in years to come. I'm not bias about transplants because I think I would rather die then receive a transplant (lungs) after watching so many failed friends get their hopes up for it not to be successful.

But to not donate organs because of this is bizarre.

echt · 29/08/2023 00:09

My personal preference now is to keep kidneys, lungs, pancreas and liver on the list, but ive taken heart and corneas off because I just can't bear the thought of ending up in the 'wrong sort' of person. And I don't care if that makes you furious. It's my body

Crackpot reasoning.

Orbitold · 29/08/2023 00:10

Over40Overdating · 28/08/2023 23:32

This is genuinely one of the most spiteful things I have ever read.

Based on nothing but your own bigotry you’ve started a thread whipping up fear about something that does not exist and even if it did would be something you could opt out of. All so you can claim you are standing up for women’s rights and might get to snub your nose at an imaginary scenario for a hypothetical trans person on your death bed.

I hope you never know the terror and desperation that comes with knowing your life or that of a loved one depends on someone else’s altruism and compassion at the worst point in their lives.

It’s been coming a while but this is the post that has finished me with mumsnet. The bile and nastiness being dressed up as some kind of heroic act for women now even coming down to starting this kind of misinformation and fear mongering about organ or tissue donation is too much.

It might all be a great game of ‘I’m the hero’ to those of you encouraging each other to opt out, meanwhile people die waiting for organs gone unused because people are swayed either by your spite or by the fear you’ve started with misinformation.

And I don’t believe for one second that any one of your lofty principles would extend to saying no if you or a loved one needed a donation.

Not sure if I’ve missed something g - has the OP said anywhere at all that the issue for her has anything to do with trans people? Genuine question

ToastyCrumpets · 29/08/2023 00:11

echt · 29/08/2023 00:09

My personal preference now is to keep kidneys, lungs, pancreas and liver on the list, but ive taken heart and corneas off because I just can't bear the thought of ending up in the 'wrong sort' of person. And I don't care if that makes you furious. It's my body

Crackpot reasoning.

Do you not agree with the concept of “my body, my choice”, then?

ToWhitToWhoo · 29/08/2023 00:12

Well, you have a right to your decision- though I think it's a pity, given all the people who die waiting for a suitable donor. But no one is OBLIGED to be a donor. I am, however, a bit puzzled about why you are so against reproductive organ donation. I can understand ethical concerns about using living donors, due to the possibility that people might feel under pressure to undergo the risk of surgery to treat a non-life-threatening condition (though even there, I would support tight safeguarding rules rather than a ban). But I don't understand the concern about using a womb from a dead person (if that is even possible) if you are OK with donating other organs. And if this does worry you, couldn't you put it on record that you are prepared to donate other organs but not reproductive ones?

Are you also against egg and sperm donation?

I am certainly remaining on the donor list. OK, at my age my womb would not be usable anyway; but even if I were younger, I don't think that aspect would be an issue for me.

Thelnebriati · 29/08/2023 00:12

has the OP said anywhere at all that the issue for her has anything to do with trans people?

No she hasn't. There are other ethical objections to this (and surrogacy).

user9630721458 · 29/08/2023 00:13

@Alargeoneplease89 A very big issue with womb transplants is that any baby grown in that womb is an experiment. That is unethical to many people.

Alargeoneplease89 · 29/08/2023 00:14

ToastyCrumpets · 29/08/2023 00:11

Do you not agree with the concept of “my body, my choice”, then?

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I think a fair system would be those that opt in get a transplant.

Surely people like you wouldn't want "the wrong sort of person" in you?

neverexpectedthis · 29/08/2023 00:14

When you opt in, you state which organs you're comfortable with donating. There is nothing on there about reproductive orders so they can't just start retrospectively removing wombs and transplanting them into biological males.

Obviously it's a very personal choice but I believe that if you would be willing to receive an organ (should you need one) then it's only right to be willing to donate your own.

echt · 29/08/2023 00:14

ToastyCrumpets · 29/08/2023 00:11

Do you not agree with the concept of “my body, my choice”, then?

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Of course. Still utterly daft thinking, so OK if the wrong sort gets the kidney but not the heart.

godmum56 · 29/08/2023 00:14

melj1213 · 28/08/2023 22:34

And if they haven't got your express consent to take them then they can't, they can only take whatever you have agreed to donate, so if I say yes to heart/lungs/liver and nothing else they can't just help themselves to my corneas and kidneys while they're in there because I'd didn't expressly say no. Currently there is no need to opt out of donating reproductive organs because it is not a standard option for donation.

Tbh it's a more precarious position to not be registered as if you are then you have said "You can take XYZ and nothing else" and they have to legally respect those wishes and will go to your family as say "Jane has registered as an organ donor and it is on record that she wants to donate her lungs/liver/kidneys, are you happy for us to do that or do you know anything more about her donation wishes?".

However, if you aren't registered then they can go to your family and say you aren't registered as a donor but XYZ organs are viable for donation and will ask if they want to consent to any organ donation, at which point the decision about which specific organs are donated is solely down to your family.

if I had specific objections then I'd a) be explicit about what I was happy for them to have and b) inform all of my family/NOK of my donation wishes, I wouldn't just deregister and say nothing

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You don't deregister, you register as refusing.

Alargeoneplease89 · 29/08/2023 00:15

user9630721458 · 29/08/2023 00:13

@Alargeoneplease89 A very big issue with womb transplants is that any baby grown in that womb is an experiment. That is unethical to many people.

Surely if that was the case, like other organs you get a choice on what's donated?

Cynicaltheorist · 29/08/2023 00:15

I've done the same as you and for the same reason. I wonder whether if enough people suddenly do it, it will raise some questions. We can go back onto the register any time we choose.

ToastyCrumpets · 29/08/2023 00:15

echt · 29/08/2023 00:14

Of course. Still utterly daft thinking, so OK if the wrong sort gets the kidney but not the heart.

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It’s OP’s decision though - not really for anyone else to comment on the reasons

Elphame · 29/08/2023 00:15

echt · 29/08/2023 00:08

So you think the qualified nature of life after transplant is being ignored by those in support of transplants?

What a weaselly reason to drag in. Shame on you.

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Don't put words in my mouth.

I personally know two people who had a far worse quality of life after transplant surgery. People seem to believe that a transplant will provide a magical cure.In some cases that may be true, in other it isn't. A much more honest discussion of the pros and cons is needed rather than rose tinted glasses.

Not wanting a poor quality of life is one of the many reasons why I would refuse a transplant.