Is WFH worth it?

[pickleandcheese]

I'm struggling to make a decision about changing jobs. Currently I work from home and have done since covid. It obviously has a great deal of pros - no commute, can work in my pjs, very flexible for childcare/school runs/sick days and overall very quiet and stress free.

However it's made me feel very isolated and our team has pretty much disbanded as a result. My work was never particularly interesting (think receptionist/clerical work) but now it's just me sat at home with no office banter or visitors. It's just really lonely. I've also fallen into the trap of keeping my 2 year old at home with me for one day a week to cut back on childcare costs and very quickly realised what an error this was. It's impossible to get anything done unless she's napping or occasionally my in laws will take her for an hour to two. But in the meantime I feel like I'm failing her and my employer.

Anyway another job has come up in a role in much more interested in but it would mean going back to the office for at least three days a week. Initially this would cost me money as I'd need to increase dd nursery days and the wage increase wouldn't cover it. It would also mean no more 'popping out' to do the school run and sick days would be sick days not just logging on and seeing what I could manage. I'd have to wear real clothes and there wouldn't be any flexibility or free time. Work time would be work time.

I'm wondering if it's worth it. How much do you value wfh? I know I've been lucky to have this for as long as I have but truly, its not all daytime tv and pjs, it can be very hard and very isolating. Wwyd in my position? I don't want to go for a new job, get it then miss my freedom.

Does that mean your colleagues will all be there too? In that case I'd be really tempted to go for it, if you can afford to drop the day. You're presumably paying 4 days a week childcare now, so that would be a saving at least.

I wouldn't do it if it were going to be say me sat with one other admin person and other people turning up occasionally if they were seeing clients, or similar.

But even if you decide to stay in your current role, the way you're managing it sounds untenable.

I need to WFH due to my disability, otherwise my sickness rate would stop me working. But I never get lonely as I am very introverted and even when I was in an office, I didn't chat, we just all sat with headphones in.

But you aren't happy. Weight up the additional costs against how happy you would be in an office. Is it a set three days for everyone? In mu place hybrid days aren't set so the office is still pretty empty a lot of the time.

You work on your PJ's? Do you not have online meetings to attend?

I WFH but I still dress and make myself presentable.

I went from a job where I worked 5 days fully WFH to one where I'm commuting into the office twice a week. Although it is (or can be!) nice to physically be around the team, even 2 days away from home during the week means I'm not as 'on top' of things at home as I used to be, for example I used to be able to throw a load of washing on while the kettle was boiling - for some reason, losing those 2 days at home makes such a difference. The commute is annoying - the trains can be unreliable, other people are annoying, and I'm out of the house for 12 hours to accommodate an 8.5 hour working day. I'm more tired than I was. The house is messier and for 2 nights, I really don't want to make dinner when I walk in at 7.30pm. I'd be happier with only one day a week in the office, or fully WFH but what suits me may not suit others. When I am working at home, I still get up early, shower, get dressed (looking presentable from the waist up!!) and this helps to categorise that I'm working rather than just being at home. I also have a work station and don't work from bed/ in front of television etc.

I would keep your current job as it's more money, but start to look for something else that's hybrid working, but where you won't drop money.

I work full time from home and it’s boring as hell. Yeah it’s handy but I did used to go to the office everyday before covid and still managed the kids and housework etc.

3 days in the office sounds brilliant tbh, see people get out of the house, chat, learn stuff. No brainier and best of both - good luck

It sounds like your top priority is the flexibility wfh provides for parenting. Three days working from the office is a big negative in that regard. Are the - medium term - pay rise and career development opportunities worth it?

I’d probably seek a higher paid job with 2 days in the office, to make the additional costs etc worth it, and in the meantime make some changes to address some of the current issues. Eg you’re willing to change your whole work pattern you can carve out time for a lunch break.

Parenting a two year old for the whole working day, every week, is taking the piss, and isn’t allowed by most employers.

My worry with hybrid is it could end up being the worst of both worlds for someone in OPs position. Inevitable reduction in flexibility, but without necessarily providing the level of socialisation and company she wants.

My previous job was 100% WFH and I hated it. I was incredibly productive and worked hard, but the isolation was awful. My current job is hybrid - we get to decide how many days we come in, unless there is a face to face event we have to be at. I usually work 3 days at home, 2 in the office and it's perfect for me. My line manager is usually in when I am, but there are also people from other departments that I get on with. We have an online desk booking system so you can always find somewhere to be.

Both DH and I have been hybrid since Covid, going into work for 2-3 days a week. It's a perfect compromise IMO.

I've WFH, or been home based and gone to meet clients etc for about 16 years. I love it and would never go back to full time office, which I have always hated. Officially we are supposed to go in one day a week but my current employer but my manager lives further away than I do and we can usually get away with 1 day in 2-3 weeks, sometimes longer. I can do house admin, but also can get on with work and feel less distracted than when working in an office. Plus I am not very tolerant of office politics and other peoples bad habits.

Wfh worked for me but I know it would not work for others (now we have hybrid working, I go in on set days). I put on 'real clothes' when at home, such that to go out all I need to do is put shoes and a coat on, though they are not what I wear to an office.

I would not move to a job now with three days a week in an office.

What about evenings?
You say you don't see other people even in the evenings.
I WFH full time and love it, but I have a rich social life. I'm a lone parent with one teenager at home so obviously things are easier now but even when he was younger I found ways to prioritise seeing other people.

I was in a job for 7 years with very high flex around hybrid (kids teen/tween) - I would go in 1 day a week (sometimes more/less) but it felt very remote/isolating. There was no team bonding as everyone did the same and I sometimes didn't see some people for days! I moved to a new job that's 2-3 days in office, some end do 4 days coz they want to. It's less flexible and more exhausting. But I LOVE it. It's like I've found my energy and human connection again. Everyone comes in on Tuesday-Wednesday so that's as definite overlap day for team meetings / face to face meetings. I go in 1 more day of my choice. It feels so much more alive and committed. I look forward to work on Sunday evenings and zoom/teams is not the default plan - it's the backup plan if everyone is not in the room.

I passed on other jobs where I was required to be 99% remote even though they were great options with similar pay.

You seem like the kind that would thrive with people around you and focussed space to work. Wfh is mentally exhausting trying to juggle work with home and getting neither done very well. And look is like you have an easy time on top of it.

I'd recommend you move to a job where you work 2-3 days from office with a not very long commute. After you build up your reputation you can flex a bit more and have best of both worlds.

Seems like the new job would plug the areas that your current rule is lacking and enforce the work/home boundaries that you need. I’d take the job and then reevaluate in a year or two.

In my experience there is nothing worse than feeling totally demotivated at work and this negative feeling casts a shadow in all areas of your life.

I detest working from home. I'm so glad we don't have to anymore. The loneliness, distraction, over eating, lack of exercise even walking into the building etc, feeling like people are questioning what I'm working on even though no one has even hinted they are...

I'm lucky to not work to far from home, not have a dress code and have a gym at work though. If I had a long commute I might feel differently

Hi OP,
I'm also an admin. I moved from full time in the office to full time at home over the summer. I put the pros and cons like this;

Office
Pros
Connections with Co workers
More interesting conversations and the chance to pick up work relating to these
Gets you out the house so you actually enjoy your house when you get back
Feel like a better parent when you are being a parent as you aren't trying to work
Might not apply but better for confidence as you have to dress professionally and stop eating whilst having meetings/working

Cons
Expensive commute/ parking
Childcare more (afterschool/ nursery)
Stressful trying to get back to pick ups
No more putting a wash on, washing up on your lunch break
Less productive at times if you chat (like me)
Resentful of home workers at times

WFH
Pros
Better home life balance
Clean house, more time in the evening as you've done stuff in the day
No rushing to get to nursery pick ups
Massive savings on childcare/ petrol/ parking

Cons
Boring, isolated
Your house is now your work. Feels weird sitting at your workspace and having a glass of wine on a Friday night if you work at the kitchen table
Less creative due to less co-production
Don't know what you're missing out on in the office in terms of opportunities
Less promotion? That's only my experience though

So if you go for the other job there are definitely going to be times when you regret it. When the nursery bill comes in, when you're running around, when you can't get to the doctors in the day or ring BT... but if nothing changes you'll often wonder what if?
How much worse off will you be?
I'm going back to the office 5 days after a brief spell at home and I'll be £300 at least worse off. That's a lot considering an increase in mortgage rates, food etc but I think it will pay off and I'll get promoted quicker if people know who I am. That's in NHS admin though, if your current company is completely remote it might not apply.

I really don't like WFH. My manager is happy for me to do the odd day here and there, usually if I have a lot of Teams meetings in one day, or a big piece of work to finish. I'm not keen on it myself, I really need to be in the office to motivate myself properly. I don't have a ridiculous commute on public transport though, and I find the 40-min drive gives me headspace to think through problems, etc.

Well done you, you win the home working style competition.

I do actually get up, shower and put a bit of make up on just to get into work mode but yes I do wear lounge wear and so do my colleagues if we ever have team meetings. Because it would be a bit daft to don a business suit to sit at my kitchen table.

I definitely think it depends on how you feel in your own company.

I WFH but have monthly team days so I'm only required in the office 1 day a month - and I hate that day. I get much more done when I'm at home because it's silent and I can focus.
And it's not that it's everyone's excitement of seeing each other as many do go in more often so see each other regularly but for me personally, I thrive when WFH.

My job is WFH but that doesn't mean I have to stay home. With a mobile and a laptop I can work from anywhere. I often drive to Brighton and work from one of the seafront hotels for example. Great for meetings, free WiFi and you only have to buy a coffee. I couldn't get tied to an office or the home. I need to have autonomy over my day.

The new job is a totally new job by the way, in a new organisation. So I think fear of the unknown (new co workers, a new role etc) is also worrying me. It could be amazing, but it could be a better the devil you know situation too.

What I would say is that the job im in now is dead end. No progression routes and at times it can be quite demeaning. The new job would be a new challenge and the nature of the role makes me almost certain I'd find it more fulfilling and satisfying. But of course I don't know if I'd definitely enjoy it in practice.

My office has recently announced it’s closing. I tend to go in about 2 days a week at the moment which is a good balance for me (it’s 30 mins from home and I was in every day before Covid). Since the pandemic the office is underutilised. I’m ready gutted and considering looking for another role which is hybrid, but not really willing to travel more than half an hour. So I’ll probably end up full time wfh either way. I think this wfh trend is a huge step backwards for team working and collaboration and I’m not looking forward to it. It has some benefits on a personal level but I’m worried I’ll go mad being at home all the time! We’re planning an extension with a dedicated study which will help I suppose.

I hate working from home, hate it. It sounds though that for you something hybrid so in-between working solely from home and having to go into office would be ideal? There are still a fair few of these about, best of both worlds really. Most LA and CS jobs offer this.

I never understand why people say WFH avoids office politics - they are still there.

The worst office poltics I experienced (and left my job over) was in 2020 when my entire organisation worked from home full time. In fact it was worse as I felt really isolated and miserable and there were no colleagues to see how upset and demotivated I was and drag me out for a quick coffee.