AIBU to give DD this gift? (Lighthearted)

[coldchipsfortea]

18 year old DD is lovely, but has a definite habit of pinching my cosmetics and in particular perfume. At the moment I've got a v nice bottle if perfume that I got for Christmas which she uses almost daily!

She doesn't try and pretend she not using it - we can all smell it! 😂

Problem will be solved soon as shes heading off to uni in a different city in a few weeks 😭😭. I'm v proud of her, and am really going to miss her - so I had decided just to get her a bottle of said perfume as a going away pressie. A kind of "there you go have this as you wont be able to steal mine". But now a friend has said this is ridiculously indulgent and she needs to learn not to pinch my things.

I think it ok to indulge her as you only leave home for the first time once. So AIBU to give her the perfume?

You always get the people that think if your giving them more than milk and bread you're indulging them!

Give her a bottle. She's worked hard and uni is hard and I'm sure she'll love having a bottle of her own.

Lovely idea! My daughters have been using my perfume since they were very young, normal mother daughter thing I'd say.

your friend sounds jealous & v opinionated

Your friend sounds overbearing. My daughter freely uses my perfume and I freely let her. She doesn't mind smelling like me which to me is a sign of the bond and love we share.

I think that it was a lovely going away present.

I would wrap it up, so she can't tell exactly what it is, and say that when/if she feels she's missing home a bit it's time to open it.

Your so called friend is ridiculous and probably jealous. It’s a beautiful gift in many ways. The smell and evocative memories of her mother will last a life time.

I think this is absolutely lovely and your friend is ridiculous.

Aww the idea of my daughters nicking a bit of my perfume in a few years makes me so happy!! It sounds like a lovely gift idea OP, ignore your friend's very odd and joyless advice!

What a weird friend!

I think it's perfectly normal to buy your child a gift when they leave for uni, and a thoughtful one at that.

This is a really lovely idea. It will remind her of you and your connection.

My mum's perfume was my 'something borrowed' when I got married.

That's a lovely idea!

I’m 40 and still nab sprays of my mum’s perfume when I’m at her house. She does the same when she’s at mine- no qualms about using my nice hand creams and moisturisers either.

Life is short and relationships are important. Unless your daughter was taking your perfume for malicious reasons, I think it’s a perfectly normal thing to do.

Give her the perfume, and ignore your friend.

I think it's the perfect gift for your DD heading off to Uni, it'll be a real comfort to her, I'm sure.

Whenever I have to go away overnight, my 14 year old DD always asks me to spray a little of my perfume onto her pillow, which I think is lovely, and makes me feel missed! Whenever I am nearing the end of a bottle of perfume and have purchased a replacement, I always give the old bottle to this one of my DDs as she finds being able to use it when I'm not around really comforting.

I think it's lovely. Your friend is a mood hoover. I only have sons and becuase I wear a unisex Jo Malone scent it frequently wafts out the house behind them. See also a pink hoodie which seems very a la mode

I openly tell DSD and DD they are welcome to use my perfumes /fancy toiletries

Partly prompted I think by threads on here where people were getting petty about the same thing.

I think buying her a bottle is a lovely idea

It's a fantastic idea OP. My DS goes off in a couple of weeks too so sending hugs, it's not easy to smile and wave when your baby is leaving.

I think it's a sweet gift. Ignore your friend. My grown-up kids sometimes "borrow" my stuff, but any initial annoyance is quickly compensated for by feeling very flattered that someone young and cool actually approves of my taste!😁

Sod what your friend thinks. She's your child, friends come and go. Enjoy spoiling her and give her some extra too. I gladly give my daughters my stuff, even if they're cheeky little monkeys and take it anyway. Xx

Absolutely but her it, she'll remember it forever and you never know, may buy you some in the future!

Aw I’d absolutely give her the perfume it will remind her of home. You’re friend sounds quite cold.

Its a gorgeous idea, i get what your friend is saying if she's thinking of your daughter invading your private space to go roiting in drawers and using the last of your expensive toiletries (which some teens do and would be a problem imo), but this is not the same situation at all

The perfect gift :)

Oh blimey - my DD is exactly the same! Definite buy her the perfume, it's a lovely idea!

Give her yours and keep the new one! ...but don't let on you've ordered another

I don't have a particularly close relationship with my DM, but I always spray a scarf with her perfume when I go on holiday.

I just like to be able to smell "her"

DD (8) is forever pinching a squirt of my perfume, or adopting a lip gloss from my make-up bag, because "we share, don't we mummy?"