To expect nursery not to stain ALL the clothes?

[Hollyisalrightactuallysorry]

Posting this as I genuinely am not sure if IABU

DS1 is 4 and DS2 is 20 months. DS1 went to a nursery where we used to live. No issues, fairly run of the mill. All of his old clothes are now being worn by DS2.

New nursery started 4 months ago for both. Again, no major concerns and kids have settled in nicely

Except, DS2 comes home with at least 2 bagged up bundles of clothes each day and is usually wearing his 3rd set. On washing the clothes, almost all of them are covered in paint. And this paint does NOT come out. I've tried everything!

I've just counted and DS2 now has just 4 t shirts and 2 pairs of shorts that aren't stained. And I'm talking quite badly, not just flecks.

I've brought this up with the nursery and they've sort of taken the attitude that I should expect clothes at nursery on a 20 month old to get ruined and therefore should just keep sending him in wearing the stained but clean clothes

The problem is that they are going through so many clothes each day that I end up inevitably sending him wearing something not stained and begging them to put overalls on.

I don't understand how DS1 wore these clothes for a whole season without getting a single stain on them and we are now not able to get through a single day without something being ruined.

I don't know what else to do. I've asked for overalls to be worn and asked why they don't use washable paint. They say they'll water the paint down but the latest bags of clothes are also ruined

AIBU to expect nursery to take a bit of care when using materials that stain?

YABU- pretty usual at nursery at that age
YANBU-I'd raise it with management again

You are not being unreasonable. I would expect them to cover clothes appropriately. Some mess from mealtimes and the odd paint splatter fair enough but not multiple changes of clothes. Surely it takes them longer to change full outfits that to stick an overall on him. I also don't know why they would use paint that isn't washable.

I would try reducing the amount of spare clothes you send. We only send one spare to our childminders and they rarely use it, usually if they've sat in a Puddle or had a nappy leak.

I’m with you OP - we had the exact same problem with this nursery super paint 😂

I ended up buying a job lot of dark clothes on Vinted and using that as DCs “nursery wardrobe”

it is annoying though!

I don't think some posters are appreciating how messy some nurseries let children get. I literally washed my child with a hosepipe last summer (it was hot) before he could come in the house because he looked like he'd been up the chimney! I know others at the same nursery did similar. I can afford enough Asda t-shirts but I don't think that's the point - children shouldn't be coming home so ridiculously dirty that clothes are stained on an almost daily basis even when you pre-soak them, use bio powder etc. It's a massive waste of resources. My children's nursery doesn't use bibs past 12 months - stuff like that is just ridiculous.

If your daily diary for the child said "no painting, no water play, no crafts, no play dough completed today because child wouldn't wear an apron; did not play outside because child wouldn't wear waterproofs; did not eat because child didn't want to wear a bib", I guess you'd be complaining...

My dd often comes home with paint on her clothes but they don't really change her out of it unless shes spilt milk or something. It's just a bit of paint it dries and she is still wearing it when she comes home.
As an early years teacher I can vouch for the fact that we do buy "washable" paint that we have to buy from the education authority catalogue but it doesn't easily wash out (or at all)
I just send dd in to crèche in paint stained washed clothes. She's having fun and is happy!

It’s normal to have a few paint marks, felt tip, food stains etc. It’s not usual to have several items of clothing written off a week. I love it when kids come home messy and occasionally the stains don’t come out but not often. They obviously don’t realise how bad their paints are.

YABU. Children are meant to be messy. That's how they learn.

Get yourself on vinted in future and buy a bundle. Much cheaper.

I don't think yabu, I am actually going through the exact same thing, but I won't say anything to the nursery because my daughter is learning and having fun. But argggggh it's frustrating 😂

Yabu I'm afraid. Clothes for little kids don't stay neat and nice if the kids are having fun. No nursery can't supervise 15 kids getting into overalls. Buy a fews sets of overalls to supplement the already-paint clothing outfits and send your DC into nursery wearing painty overalls (over a simple bodysuit, not a full outfit) or already-painty clothes every day. Never send in clean non-overalls clothes again. Keep non-overalls unpainty clothing for non-nursery days.

YANBU - what a waste of resources washing things constantly and the last thing you want to do when you've been at work all day is have to faff about trying to get stains out of 3 sets of clothes! Even when I was at juniors we all had to take one of our dads old shirts to wear during art to protect our clothes.

It pisses me off that primary school has a mud kitchen when the uniform is a white shirt and socks. It's so wasteful having to chuck away clothes that are stained after a few wears.

My Dd is 19 months and at nursery and I make sure she is in clothes I don't mind getting stained, will re use the stained clothes and prefer to see her come back like that and happy than to come back clean. The dirtier she comes home the more fun I know she's had!

Why does it matter if they wear stained clothes?

School paint is best dealt with cold water. The hotter the water ghe more it seems to 'fix' it. Soak in cold water first with washing powder , i usually scrub them and then wash on low.

Our nursery put the kids in spare clothes when they do messy play, not sure why they don't do the same. He does come back with paint marks here and there but generally it's fine

Because at some point it's stains on stains on stains. I've never seen any child sent into nursery in clothes that bad, in the same way children don't tend to be sent in ripped clothes even though that doesn't actually matter that much. As I said, I've taught EYFS and don't mind a bit of mess. I do expect my child to at least be told to wear an apron when painting though, or have a bib put around their neck when eating luminous orange sweet and sour at age 13 months.

If my child wouldn't put on an apron, no I wouldn't expect them to be allowed to paint. A child in my classroom also wouldn't be allowed to do activities if they didn't follow instructions. That will be the case in EYFS classrooms up and down the country.

I'm with you, I'd be really annoyed by this. Washable paint is the best least they can provide, surely?!

I found heavily patterned stuff the best for hiding stains. For DDs I get a lot of densely patterned floral tops as you can't see staining very well on them. Plain one-colour tops show it really bad.

Why would OP need 15-20 sets of clothes? Surely OP can wash in the week to avoid this.

I have bought cheap stuff from Asda before. 5 tops for £12 and 5 bottomed for £12 or buy cheap bundles on Vinted. It won't cost that much and you only really need ten tops and ten bottoms but just wash and rotate.

Quite a few people have said YABU but you seem to be ignoring them. 3 sets of clothes does sound like a lot but it's not the end of the world.

Why don’t they wear aprons/overall for messy play, is this not a thing now ?

Some children hate aprons and cry and make a fuss, the younger they are the harder it is to keep them on them as they don't understand what they are for. It is more important, developmentally, that they get to explore messy play without worrying about aprons and mess.

You first child either didn't like messy play so much, it wasn't available, or they didn't mind getting covered up as much as your younger child does.

Why are they going through 3/4 sets of clothes? Is he soiling them or is it just because they have paint on them?

We have had this a lot with my DD and I have just accepted that things will get paint stains many days, but that was just one outfit a day, or two if she had an accident, not multiple. It sounds like that's the problem for me, that's a lot of washing for you.

Some children are just very messy! I never got dirty as a child - I have whats verging on a phobia about being dirty. My DSis on the other hand was always filthy! I know children who despite wearing aprons will still manage to get covered in paint / glue / spaghetti sauce!

Regarding paint - the suppliers are who you should be focusing on. They sell paint saying it's washable and some colours really aren't. My work uniform also has paint that won't come out on it.

As an early years worker I wish parents would send their child to nursery with old clothes, don’t buy anything new or fancy.

Nursery is all about learning, being creative and exploring. Clothes are not our top priority, having a good relationship with your child, providing exciting experiences and keeping your child safe is our priorities.

YABU a dirty child is one who has had fun exploring the mud, tried new food, been creative in the art area, played in the gloop, climbed trees, jumped over some obstacles in the garden, crawled around the floor while pretending to be a dinosaur etc etc,