DD12 smoked cannabis

Mikaylaschofield · 2023-08-19T17:59:06+00:00

And I am in bits. She went to meet some friends and apparently someone had it and she says she had 2 puffs. I knew straight away by looking at her so not sure if she’s being honest about what she had. is there anything I need to do? I’m worried about her health is there any chance she could get unwell or would it would have passed now ?

OnSilverStars · 19/08/2023 19:00

She will not get unwell from cannabis. Don't stress. Talk to her about it being illegal and her being safe. Besides that I wouldn't worry. It's legal in a lot of places now.

MoggyMittens23 · 19/08/2023 19:02

OnSilverStars · 19/08/2023 19:00

She will not get unwell from cannabis. Don't stress. Talk to her about it being illegal and her being safe. Besides that I wouldn't worry. It's legal in a lot of places now.

She’s 12! I would be fucking gutted if this was my dd. 15/16 maybe diffeeebt but 12? What are these friends like and where did she meet them?

Annaishere · 19/08/2023 19:02

No she’ll be fine. Maybe don’t talk to her about it now or you could make her high turn bad. I would talk about it being addictive and causing mental health issues

Sunshineclouds11 · 19/08/2023 19:04

Health wise she'll be fine,

Agree with pp talk about it tomorrow.

Original poster

Mikaylaschofield · 19/08/2023 19:05

OnSilverStars · 19/08/2023 19:00

She will not get unwell from cannabis. Don't stress. Talk to her about it being illegal and her being safe. Besides that I wouldn't worry. It's legal in a lot of places now.

Trust me I really am
iv talked over thee scenarios with her
I never ever thought I would have to deal with this at 12. I only let her up town as it’s a public place and people can see but still it’s happened
it seems they met up with a bigger crowd I genuinely never thought this was on the cards either
obviously she will not be going out again if this is what happens

OP posts:

Original poster

Mikaylaschofield · 19/08/2023 19:05

But right now my main concern is her immediate safety she seems ok but I don’t know what to expect iv never had it or known anyone that smokes if

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Frabbits · 19/08/2023 19:06

She's 12 and is experimenting like all kids do.

2 puffs won't hurt her, just have a chat about the dangers of drug misuse and move on. Don't make it a bigger deal than it needs to be.

Cowlover89 · 19/08/2023 19:06

She'll be fine

Createausername1970 · 19/08/2023 19:08

She won't get unwell from a couple of puffs.

My concern would be whether it is going to happen again..... and again..... and again. And why did a child presumably of a similar age have weed?

It is rife nowadays. I don't like it. My adopted son had a BF with mental health issues exacerbated by weed, so I am aware it is not the harmless thing some people say. I hated that my DS smoked it at college.

I would want to know more about what happened today, who had it and where they got it from.

dreambeavers · 19/08/2023 19:08

She'll be absolutely fine.

vodkaredbullgirl · 19/08/2023 19:09

She be ok.

twoandcooplease · 19/08/2023 19:10

Her health will be absolutely fine

whatabeautifulwedding · 19/08/2023 19:12

She will be fine in the short term.

I'd be more concerned with the people she is hanging around with and what other things they will be getting up to. Is this her usual friendship group?

WhatFlavourIsIt · 19/08/2023 19:16

Worst that will happen is she'll be stoned and fall asleep or go a little bertie and throw up which would have probably happened by now if it was going to. Experiments with drugs & alcohol are always in the cards as our kids get older. It's time to educate yourself and start having honest &frank conversations.

Badbadbunny · 19/08/2023 19:17

whatabeautifulwedding · 19/08/2023 19:12

She will be fine in the short term.

I'd be more concerned with the people she is hanging around with and what other things they will be getting up to. Is this her usual friendship group?

I agree with that, the OP really needs to keep an eye open re the kind of friends she's hanging around with!

Original poster

Mikaylaschofield · 19/08/2023 19:19

Createausername1970 · 19/08/2023 19:08

She won't get unwell from a couple of puffs.

My concern would be whether it is going to happen again..... and again..... and again. And why did a child presumably of a similar age have weed?

It is rife nowadays. I don't like it. My adopted son had a BF with mental health issues exacerbated by weed, so I am aware it is not the harmless thing some people say. I hated that my DS smoked it at college.

I would want to know more about what happened today, who had it and where they got it from.

I do know there’s a girl she’s not allowed to see but came and it seems my dd and another girl
wrnt with her and did it. Dd fancies a boy and so didn’t want to not! This si what I have to work on
It seems she has had a bad time and wanted to call me but didn’t as she thought I’d be upset. It breaks my heart to thi k of all this she is 12! I think I just need to have less of her just hanging around it’s not good

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Original poster

Mikaylaschofield · 19/08/2023 19:19

WhatFlavourIsIt · 19/08/2023 19:16

Worst that will happen is she'll be stoned and fall asleep or go a little bertie and throw up which would have probably happened by now if it was going to. Experiments with drugs & alcohol are always in the cards as our kids get older. It's time to educate yourself and start having honest &frank conversations.

I know that but she is 12!

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ImNotAMermaid · 19/08/2023 19:23

Dh and I smoked a bit of weed together at 17/18 but 12!? It’s affected my memory and I was significantly older than her. Her poor brain. I would ban her from meeting those friends as that is not normal 12 year old behaviour. Teenagers experiment (which I’m not condoning btw) but she’s not even a teen. Also OP a couple of puffs can make you stoned if you don’t have a tolerance, particularly if you are petite (aka any 12 yo), I’m 5ft3 and 39kg and on the rare occasion I do smoke, it goes to my head very quickly.

ImNotAMermaid · 19/08/2023 19:25

@WhatFlavourIsIt as someone that still occasionally smokes weed, she’s 12, what you are saying would be true at 16 but (as a teacher), I can guarantee that drug issues tend to occur from year 10 upwards, it’s unheard of in year 7/8.

YukoandHiro · 19/08/2023 19:28

Give her something sugary to eat in case she's lying about how much she's smoked. If she's never smoked it and has had a lot she might start to feel faint and queasy and go very pale - raising blood sugar levels can prevent this.

She'll likely be absolutely fine but like you I'd be gutted at 12. It is different to 15/16... If it's any consolation I had my first cigarette at 12, and weed (as long as it's not skunk) is safer for the body than that. It's not that unusual sadly.

I would take great pride in the fact that she told you, and work with that. Coming down like a ton of bricks might push her towards these friends and away from you

WhatFlavourIsIt · 19/08/2023 19:30

@ImNotAMermaid - clearly, it's not unheard of because op's daughter is an example that it is happening
Maybe the area where I live is very different from where you are. Kids here are definitely experimenting from 12.

Original poster

Mikaylaschofield · 19/08/2023 19:33

ImNotAMermaid · 19/08/2023 19:23

Dh and I smoked a bit of weed together at 17/18 but 12!? It’s affected my memory and I was significantly older than her. Her poor brain. I would ban her from meeting those friends as that is not normal 12 year old behaviour. Teenagers experiment (which I’m not condoning btw) but she’s not even a teen. Also OP a couple of puffs can make you stoned if you don’t have a tolerance, particularly if you are petite (aka any 12 yo), I’m 5ft3 and 39kg and on the rare occasion I do smoke, it goes to my head very quickly.

I know that’s what’s killing me she is a baby, my baby.
she 100% won’t be with any of them. From now on it’s structured activities only and with girls o know that would not do that

OP posts:

Original poster

Mikaylaschofield · 19/08/2023 19:33

WhatFlavourIsIt · 19/08/2023 19:30

@ImNotAMermaid - clearly, it's not unheard of because op's daughter is an example that it is happening
Maybe the area where I live is very different from where you are. Kids here are definitely experimenting from 12.

She has told
me kids do but I never thought it would be this close or that she would

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Original poster

Mikaylaschofield · 19/08/2023 19:35

YukoandHiro · 19/08/2023 19:28

Give her something sugary to eat in case she's lying about how much she's smoked. If she's never smoked it and has had a lot she might start to feel faint and queasy and go very pale - raising blood sugar levels can prevent this.

She'll likely be absolutely fine but like you I'd be gutted at 12. It is different to 15/16... If it's any consolation I had my first cigarette at 12, and weed (as long as it's not skunk) is safer for the body than that. It's not that unusual sadly.

I would take great pride in the fact that she told you, and work with that. Coming down like a ton of bricks might push her towards these friends and away from you

I’m trying to play it in the middle as In I love you and am scared for you and your health but im
goad she can clean (although I knew something was up and pressured her to tell me) her fear was that she would be grounded in order to get her to be honest I promised not to iv now said she is not however she will be doing things where I know this cannot happen not hanging about in town or uo the park

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Createausername1970 · 19/08/2023 19:36

Mikaylaschofield · 19/08/2023 19:19

I do know there’s a girl she’s not allowed to see but came and it seems my dd and another girl
wrnt with her and did it. Dd fancies a boy and so didn’t want to not! This si what I have to work on
It seems she has had a bad time and wanted to call me but didn’t as she thought I’d be upset. It breaks my heart to thi k of all this she is 12! I think I just need to have less of her just hanging around it’s not good

Show quote history

If she genuinely wanted to call you but was worried about you being cross, then now is the time to have the conversation that she must never, ever be worried about calling you if she finds herself in situations that have got out of hand. I always said this to my DS. I said I might not like what he was doing, and there might be consequences, but the important thing was that he called me or DH and we would go and get him before it he got into further difficulty.

By the sound of it, it was peer pressure and she wasn't keen anyway. So don't punish her, be open to her side and discuss what to do if she finds herself in a similar situation. Coded messages maybe - so if she phones and says a particular phrase "what time is nan coming round" or whatever, a phrase that sounds ok to anyone else within earshot, but which you know means "come and get me". It's been a learning curve, so make the best of it. 🙂