Mother making her child's mother tongue a language she herself hardly knows

[AdoraLovesCake]

I have never done an AIBU before.

This morning I went to a cafe in the UK (where I live) with my 5 year old daughter.
A woman in front of me in the long queue turns around and asks my daughter how old she is. DD replies that she is five then goes to look at the cakes.
I then crouch down to the boy holding the woman's hand (he looked age 2 or 3) and I say "Hello little one, how old are you?"
He stares blankly at me and his mother says, "Oh no. He doesn't speak English." And I think "Ok, he doesn't speak at all."
But then his mother says, "He doesn't speak ENGLISH. He speaks Spanish. Even though my partner and I don't speak Spanish very well, and we intend to live in England forever. Our friend said Spanish was easy so we taught our son that. Then when he's older, he can learn English. He'll have a bigger brain by then.
She then was about to order and I saw her type into google translate for her son, "Do you want a cookie?"

Poor boy. Why would you teach your child as their first language a language that you don't know? He's going to turn into a five year old, not understanding anything anyone is saying, having to learn English, a very hard language. Babies will pick up their first language much easier won't they.

YABU: This is normal and a good approach to parenting
YANBU: Agree with OP, this is weird

xxxx Cora

Oh I really really wanted the kid to say no comprende, amigo

@80sMum

Que?

What time in the bloody morning were you at a cafe on a Sunday when you posted this just after 9am and said you had been to a cafe this morning 🥱

Course she did, Cora (the explora) 😂

He’ll understand English just be living in an English speaking environment. He may have language difficulties as well, which they are not noticing. Or he may have learnt that his parents don’t want him to speak in English.

It indeed this is a fiction…

If you think about it, Officer Crabtree was phenomenally brave. He was living in Nazi-occupied France, he had infiltrated the local police, so was at risk of betrayal every single day, he was wearing an enemy uniform, and he didn't speak French very well. He was amazing (or amozing, if you prefer!).

Children learn to speak by listening to fluent speakers, the learning starts a long time before they try to speak. In order for him to not learn english they would have to never speak english in his presence which clearly they aren't doing. If they never speak to him except n poorly-pronounced unfluent spanish he will also have some vocabulary in poorly-pronounced unfluent spanish but that won't make him a spanish speaker.

This sounds made up. Or you misunderstood. Or they were teasing you. If the kid goes to places like cafes and is spoken to by people like you then they would learn some basic words like ‘hello’ or when someone was asking their name even if the parents only spoke a different language in front of them. (Assuming not learning difficulties)

The reason being having a bilingual child?

At least the kid will be taught by native speakers and speak to other children whose mother tongue it is. If it was not prohibitively expensive Id sent my kids to one too.

Either she was pulling your leg, or you are pulling ours. This plan so obviously clearly wouldn't work, unless the parents have no friends or relatives and never leave their child with a baby-sitter - because how could they force everyone else to speak Spanish? To say nothing of the fact that he hears English whenever he goes out, and probably for most of the time on TV. And if the parents have really been speaking nothing but Spanish at home since this child was born, they would certainly be able to say "Do you want a cookie" without using an online translator.

It's just possible, I suppose, that this child is non-verbal and this is the mother's way of deflecting inquiries.

This place used to be funny and clever

@Wouldyouguess - maybe all the other kids at the nursery are also English and hoping to learn Spanish

This

Although also applies to me trying to make sense of it and slowly realising its rubbish

Worra load of cojones

That's a very detailed conversation to have with a stranger in a coffee shop.

She old you her life story and life plan in the queue.

Sí

The Spanish nursery is actually a great idea.

The younger you learn a second language the better.

It helps with brain development and mss as makes it easier to learn more languages.

@Cherrysoup

Sorry quotes wrong person.
Meant to quote he person talking about the Spanish nursery school.

If you believe that I have a bridge in Brooklyn I'm trying to sell.

You mean you don’t buttonhole strangers in queues, telling them your parenting quirks, your friend’s opinion of the difficulty of Spanish, and exclaiming ‘We plan to live in England forever!’, possibly while raising a small St George’s flag up a tiny, portable flagpole?

My dgs lives in Wales and went to a welsh speaking nursery. He speaks welsh and English fluently.

Really?
That's what she said?

Sorry. Not buying it.

Daily Mail getting desperate? Deadline looming?