Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

This is a petty one…

67 replies

Hadenough2021 · 10/08/2023 19:24

DH went on and on about having a picture of me in a specific outfit, nothing rude just a top and jacket he really likes. A selfie to be precise. I’m not big on pictures in general and I’m not sure I’ve ever taken a selfie (I know, weird) I’m 31 in case you were interested, have a good level of confidence, I’m a good weight, wear make up and do my hair everyday just not big on selfies 🤷‍♀️

So after some badgering I finally took one (well he thinks I took one but I probably took 200 and just sent him the one I liked) and he straight away set it as his phone background. Fast forward a week, he came home from work, gave his phone to our 1 year old for entertainment and I noticed I’m not the background anymore. But about a hour later I’m the background again. The next day he comes home and I’m not the background. But then later in the evening I’m the background again. I met him for lunch during the work day, I’m not the background. In the evening, I’m the background again. All weekend I was the background. He’s just come home from work and I’m not the bloody background 🙈.

Now I do realise how ludicrous this post is. And although I noticed when I was no longer the background I wasn’t bothered by it. What I’m irritated by is the fact that he’s changing it to go to work. Is he embarrassed by me? If so why badger me for a picture. And don’t bloody change it back for my benefit in the evenings. Between a full time job two kids and elderly parents I couldn’t care less if the background is the neighbours dog. But for some reason I care that he’s going to that level of effort and I’m wondering why.

Before anyone jumps on me it’s not a revolving screensaver it isn’t an iPhone, it’s barely a smart phone. My phone has that feature, his does not.

OP posts:
Poppyseed14 · 10/08/2023 19:28

I'd ask him.

painochocolate · 10/08/2023 19:30

He's having an affair

CherryMaDeara · 10/08/2023 19:32

If he was ashamed of you he wouldn't be asking for a pic of you to use as his background.

Maybe he just doesn't like people at work seeing his personal life.

I don't have a profile pic on my work Whatsapp groups on my work phone, I prefer to keep that for my personal phone only.

Marwoodsbigbreak · 10/08/2023 19:34

This is really weird!

Comedycook · 10/08/2023 19:34

That's really odd. I can't see why it could be an affair or he's embarrassed by you because if that was the reason, why would he even ask or set it as his background at all. I'd have to ask him.

painochocolate · 10/08/2023 19:35

Actually. Is one the lock screen? And the other the wallpaper?

Mummapenguin20 · 10/08/2023 19:35

Strange

painochocolate · 10/08/2023 19:36

Comedycook · 10/08/2023 19:34

That's really odd. I can't see why it could be an affair or he's embarrassed by you because if that was the reason, why would he even ask or set it as his background at all. I'd have to ask him.

So OP thinks he can't be pretending to be single

usernother · 10/08/2023 19:38

Has he got an iPhone? You can set it so the backgrounds change and do a photo shuffle throughout the day.

sleepdeprivedby2 · 10/08/2023 19:39

Sorry but I think you are reading far too much into this.
On some phones you can set it so the Lock Screen photo changes every hour or every time the phone is locked.
From your description it sounds like it could be as simple as this. Suggest you just ask him

CurlewKate · 10/08/2023 19:40

Background and wallpaper?
Is it a sexy picture he doesn't want you children or his co workers to see?

SmirnoffIceIsNice · 10/08/2023 19:40

Best case, I'd also assume he wants to keep his private life private at work. Maybe if the phone is left on his desk he doesn't want colleagues nosing at it, making comments "oh is that your wife", or picking his phone up to have a closer look (some colleagues are incredibly nosy). I'd just ask him and see what he says.

Namechangedforthis25 · 10/08/2023 19:40

i noticed my dH didn’t have me as his background but then noticed that was on his unlocked screen whereas his locked screen still had the pic

is it that?

alialixoxo · 10/08/2023 19:41

If he's got an iPhone he may have it on the setting where it shuffles photos.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 10/08/2023 19:43

My phone seems to keep changing background on a whim of its own - between a few things that have all been the background at some point.

Is it an old I phone?

BitOutOfPractice · 10/08/2023 19:43

Yeah, if it’s an iPhone it’ll shuffle though different photos every time you unlock it.

CherryMaDeara · 10/08/2023 19:45

Her OP says it isn't an iPhone.

MumUndone · 10/08/2023 19:45

Can people RTFT? It's not an iPhone

Jagoda · 10/08/2023 19:46

Either one is wallpaper and one is Lock Screen, (or similar tech reasons) or there’s a more sinister explanation.

The only thing I thought of is an ex colleague was having an affair with our boss. She wanted to see a photo of his wife, and he showed her a really quite sexy photo, which I thought was odd. On reflection, he probably wanted his OW to feel competitive 🤢

I really hope it’s not anything like that.

VinEtFromage · 10/08/2023 19:49

The comprehension levels on here are driving me to drink.

try actually reading the OP's posts.

Marwoodsbigbreak · 10/08/2023 19:49

Surely it’s some misunderstanding around the Lock Screen?

For someone to go to all the trouble of remembering to change their screen background twice a day would be extreme, and I would be highly suspicious if my DH was doing this.

SgtBilko · 10/08/2023 19:49

Is it an iPhone? I read today in tips you can switch images to suit a situation. Don’t ask me how as I’m not interested but it seems to be a new feature. So maybe he wants a less personal picture when he is at work, for example, so has set it to switch.

GoodChat · 10/08/2023 19:49

It probably is lock screen v background. Why would he repeatedly go through the hassle of changing it otherwise?

GoodChat · 10/08/2023 19:50

SgtBilko · 10/08/2023 19:49

Is it an iPhone? I read today in tips you can switch images to suit a situation. Don’t ask me how as I’m not interested but it seems to be a new feature. So maybe he wants a less personal picture when he is at work, for example, so has set it to switch.

🚨 IT'S NOT AN IPHONE 🚨

VeridicalVagabond · 10/08/2023 19:51

Is this like the modern equivalent of taking your wedding ring off to go to work?