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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

This is a petty one…

67 replies

Hadenough2021 · 10/08/2023 19:24

DH went on and on about having a picture of me in a specific outfit, nothing rude just a top and jacket he really likes. A selfie to be precise. I’m not big on pictures in general and I’m not sure I’ve ever taken a selfie (I know, weird) I’m 31 in case you were interested, have a good level of confidence, I’m a good weight, wear make up and do my hair everyday just not big on selfies 🤷‍♀️

So after some badgering I finally took one (well he thinks I took one but I probably took 200 and just sent him the one I liked) and he straight away set it as his phone background. Fast forward a week, he came home from work, gave his phone to our 1 year old for entertainment and I noticed I’m not the background anymore. But about a hour later I’m the background again. The next day he comes home and I’m not the background. But then later in the evening I’m the background again. I met him for lunch during the work day, I’m not the background. In the evening, I’m the background again. All weekend I was the background. He’s just come home from work and I’m not the bloody background 🙈.

Now I do realise how ludicrous this post is. And although I noticed when I was no longer the background I wasn’t bothered by it. What I’m irritated by is the fact that he’s changing it to go to work. Is he embarrassed by me? If so why badger me for a picture. And don’t bloody change it back for my benefit in the evenings. Between a full time job two kids and elderly parents I couldn’t care less if the background is the neighbours dog. But for some reason I care that he’s going to that level of effort and I’m wondering why.

Before anyone jumps on me it’s not a revolving screensaver it isn’t an iPhone, it’s barely a smart phone. My phone has that feature, his does not.

OP posts:
Wendysfriend · 10/08/2023 19:51

Is it an iPhone?

😂😂😂😂Sorry couldn't resist.

My Samsung has one pic on locked screen and another on unlocked.

CherryMaDeara · 10/08/2023 19:52

SgtBilko · 10/08/2023 19:49

Is it an iPhone? I read today in tips you can switch images to suit a situation. Don’t ask me how as I’m not interested but it seems to be a new feature. So maybe he wants a less personal picture when he is at work, for example, so has set it to switch.

FacePalm

greyhairnomore · 10/08/2023 19:57

VinEtFromage · 10/08/2023 19:49

The comprehension levels on here are driving me to drink.

try actually reading the OP's posts.

I've counted 6 posters so far asking if it's a bloody iPhone 🙄

Florissante · 10/08/2023 19:59

VinEtFromage · 10/08/2023 19:49

The comprehension levels on here are driving me to drink.

try actually reading the OP's posts.

To which I would add - please ask your husband, not random people on the Internet. He is the only person who can answer your question.

usernother · 10/08/2023 20:00

@greyhairnomore I've counted 6 posters so far asking if it's a bloody iPhone 🙄

I'm very sorry. I got excited thinking I knew the answer to something, and I didn't read the thread. Really sorry Grin

Superfood · 10/08/2023 20:02

usernother · 10/08/2023 19:38

Has he got an iPhone? You can set it so the backgrounds change and do a photo shuffle throughout the day.

You couldn't even be bothered to read the whole of her post ffs

Before anyone jumps on me it’s not a revolving screensaver it isn’t an iPhone, it’s barely a smart phone. My phone has that feature, his does not.

Octosaurus · 10/08/2023 20:02

There's someone he fancies at work and he doesn't want to bring her attention to the fact he's married

Theredfoxfliesatmidnight · 10/08/2023 20:03

Man fancies his wife but also wants some privacy at work shock

Superfood · 10/08/2023 20:03

SgtBilko · 10/08/2023 19:49

Is it an iPhone? I read today in tips you can switch images to suit a situation. Don’t ask me how as I’m not interested but it seems to be a new feature. So maybe he wants a less personal picture when he is at work, for example, so has set it to switch.

Are you also not interested in reading the op's first post before jumping in with your opinion?

Before anyone jumps on me it’s not a revolving screensaver it isn’t an iPhone, it’s barely a smart phone. My phone has that feature, his does not.

FoxtrotOscarFoxtrotOscar · 10/08/2023 20:05

LTB

TVstolemyevenings · 10/08/2023 20:05

Ask him

GoodChat · 10/08/2023 20:07

Theredfoxfliesatmidnight · 10/08/2023 20:03

Man fancies his wife but also wants some privacy at work shock

Then surely you just print the picture and keep it in your wallet or something rather than switching your wallpaper multiple times a day?

BiscuitsandPuffin · 10/08/2023 20:08

Superfood · 10/08/2023 20:02

You couldn't even be bothered to read the whole of her post ffs

Before anyone jumps on me it’s not a revolving screensaver it isn’t an iPhone, it’s barely a smart phone. My phone has that feature, his does not.

Show quote history

@usernother has already apologised. There's no need to be nasty.

BiscuitsandPuffin · 10/08/2023 20:10

OP coming back to the actual topic, that is rather a lot of effort to go to if he's actually changing the background of his phone twice a day. I can't begin to imagine caring enough about the picture on my phone to do this. I think you wouldn't be unreasonable or petty to ask him about it.

Mumof2teens79 · 10/08/2023 20:14

Why would he even set it as background if he wanted to change it twice a day?

Does his phone have two profiles? My work phone has two profiles I can switch between. A work profile which is encrypted and has work apps...and different background I am guessing, and then a personal profile.
Or, I can set up my kids with their own profile on my personal phone.

How are you so sure his phone doesn't have that feature....just because it's not an iPhone doesn't mean it doesn't do other stuff

BoopK · 10/08/2023 20:14

Do you have a generally good, trusting relationship? If so, I'd ask him. It's pretty weird behaviour

Missingmyusername · 10/08/2023 20:18

Oh come on. Who could possibly be bothered, or even remember unless there was a good reason, there has to be a reason.

Daffodil63 · 10/08/2023 20:19

I wonder why he didn't just select another picture of the two of you from his phone? And what is the other photo? Is it your children?

Itsnotrightbutitsok · 10/08/2023 20:21

What is his job?

I don’t have personal pictures for my job.

It is odd he’s going to so much effort to keep changing it though.
As you say what’s the point in having you as your picture, why not just leave it blank.

I’d have to wait for a time when you see it’s not you and just ask.

ginslinger · 10/08/2023 20:21

The level of reading comprehension on here gets worse by the hour

sorry OP - I have no idea what he's doing but I'd ask him

Blondewithredlips · 10/08/2023 20:25

Comedycook · 10/08/2023 19:34

That's really odd. I can't see why it could be an affair or he's embarrassed by you because if that was the reason, why would he even ask or set it as his background at all. I'd have to ask him.

All done to provide a smoke screen?

Original poster
Hadenough2021 · 10/08/2023 20:26

Love how few people read the post properly. No it’s not an iPhone. No it doesn’t rotate pictures for different backgrounds. No it’s not his work phone, it’s his personal phone. And I also don’t thing it’s about keep work and personal separate, we work for the same company.

OP posts:
Someoneonlyyouknow · 10/08/2023 20:27

What is the picture when it's not you?

Original poster
Hadenough2021 · 10/08/2023 20:27

One picture is me (totally non rude just a normal picture) the other is the generic Samsung background.

OP posts:
Original poster
Hadenough2021 · 10/08/2023 20:30

And for absolute clarity, still not an iPhone.

OP posts:
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