Kids should stand on public transport?

[Loulou599]

I was on a crowded 1.5 hour train where half of the passengers were standing. There were 3 kids ( not together, each with an adult) who were sitting in a seat, I would guess they were all roughly the same age, around 6 years old.
I thought that kids that age should either stand or sit on their parents lap (I know that's not the most comfortable but standing for an hour and a half isn't either).
What do you think? I just thought it was messed up that these kids were chilling in seats while you had a lot of people in their 50s/60s (not old, not visibly in discomfort) standing, but then I wondered whether it's harder for a child to stand at that age (I don't have kids).

Yabu

I'm 55 and I wouldn't expect a parent to make their child give up a seat for me.

I agree with this, I am showing my age but when I was young children never got a seat to themselves if an adult was standing, they stood between their parents knees or sat on the parents lap, being held in place in both instances by the parent. Part of the rationale was that they either hadn't paid for a seat or paid half price, whereas an adult has paid full price.

I think if they’re as little as six and the train is that crowded they ought to be going on laps.

Then at least more people overall can it. Unless they’re with their pregnant mum or something.

Harder is sort of 8-10 yos - too big for laps but still a bit little for standing long distance/ can get clonked in the head etc.

I have been known to put my 9 yo in luggage spaces though (and stand in front of him so no one puts anything in there!)

^^ sorry need to elaborate- he has ADHD and would panic if “just” standing in a massive crowd

I am always slightly surprised when people suggest lap for a 6 year old. I struggle even with my 4 year old on my lap/knee. I am short and just don't have a lot of lap, it doesn't work well.

If children paying less for the bus is the rationale, then should we also be getting adults on benefits who get subsided travel to stand for those who have paid full price?

If my 6 year old would have to stand he’d have other people’s bums in his face, get hit around the head by rucksacks, can’t necessarily reach the things to hold on., he doesn’t have good balance and would very easily fall over. In addition he is most likely very tired. Luckily, in London, people understand that and usually, people get up and offer him a seat.
if an elderly person needs a seat than a younger, able bodied adult should offer one. Not some of the most vulnerable ones on transport.

@ladeluge totally agree. I always had to stand when I was a kid, now I have to stand as an adult and let the children sit - I find it very strange! Children generally have a lot more energy and are more able to stand for periods of time than most adults.

Have a little think about plane rides and fares and see why that statement is ridiculous.

As I said, I am older, in my youth there were no concessionary fares.
I still think that children could sit on parents laps but can see that is not a popular opinion on here.

Jesus Christ just be a nice person and let someone more vulnerable sit down! I’m 24 weeks pregnant and I’d still let a young child have my seat. Having energy to run around and standing still on a bus/train for 30 mins getting knocked about by people/bags is not the same.

There is also a reason why young children have to sit in booster seats in cars - they are more susceptible to injury. Just because something was done 30+ years ago doesn’t mean it’s right now and we can’t improve how we treat people.

This point makes no sense: standing is allowed on buses /trains/trams but never on planes, all seats are booked, so the situation under discussion could not occur

Also, question for those who like the ‘lap’ solution. What if the parent also doesn’t have a seat?

Apologies, I didn't realise you needed it spelled out - clearly I was referring to an elderly person. Do you know what an elderly person is?

Thst is exactly my point children could not stand on planes but still pay a lower price for their ticket. So the point that children get cheaper fares on transportation because they are expected should stand makes no sense. They get a lower fare simply because they are children.

I certainly agree kids shouldn't stand in the aisle, but sitting on parents knee: how are they getting bags in the face then? If it is because they are in the aisle seat they would get an arse or bag in the face if they were sitting by themselves. I would certainly give my seat to someone more vulnerable than me, I think I have a different consideration of what constitutes vulnerable

I meant if the parent is standing!

It also depends on the situation I think - too many variables to say “yes always” or “no never”

Dah - I mean sitting!

I don’t get your logic that adults in their 30s/40s/50s are more likely to have hidden issues than kids, elderly adults yes but not middle-aged ones. Kids can have lots of issues like dyspraxia, adhd, autism, sensory processing difficulties, hypermobility etc which make standing still for any length of time difficult, small children are less likely to have developed any strategies to deal with these difficulties or regulate yet so it may be harder for them to stand at 6 than it would be for somebody with the same condition to do at 46. It can also be very overwhelming and claustrophobic for children to stand on a crowded train when they are only at waist height to everybody else, for a child with autism who finds being in close proximity to strangers difficult it is going to feel much more overwhelming considering everyone else is much bigger than you than it may be for an average-height adult.

It also seems crazy to me that it’s illegal to have a child in the car without an appropriate booster seat but that anybody would advocate for them standing on a crowded bus or train where they would be at far more risk of injury in an accident compared to being in a car without a car seat.

For example on this train there was a woman with a baby in a sling, I found it so weird that nobody gave their seat to her. Actually thinking about it I find it even ruder that parents expect to sit next to their kid (that's what all 3 kids had, their parents were all next to them). I mean if you've got a small kid taking up a whole seat, and half the carriage is standing, even if you thought your kid was too fragile to stand wouldn't you think "hmmm, maybe just out of politeness ill offer my own seat to someone else". I'm in my 30s so no bother, but when you have people in their 50s, 60s, a mum with a baby, I just can't imagine myself letting my kid just sit there chilling in a seat OR not bother getting up myself. Do these parents think somebody will kidnap their kid if they aren't sitting next to them or something?

Kids are tiny idiot. They don't hold on tightly, they don't react safely and if they fall they hit their heads and hurt themselves.

Grown adults stand because we can be trusted not to get hurt.

The exception is the disabled or frail who children should give seats up to as they're even more likely to get hurt in a fall.

@MolkosTeenageAngst
small children are less likely to have developed any strategies to deal with these difficulties
Has to start somewhere doesn't it?

I don't get why you wouldn't put your kid on one of the luggage racks and stand in front of them, that would probably be quite fun for them

I would have offered the lady with the baby in a sling a seat.

I do try to sit next to my 4 and 6 year olds because that's what they prefer. If I try to stand while they sit, they want to stand and be with me which I don't think is very safe.

I don't offer someone healthy in their 50s/60s a seat, why should I?

I suppose the best answer is more buses on routes and more carriages on trains, but I won't hold my breath