Am I paying too much to live at my partners house?

[RJCHelp]

At the beginning of the year I moved into my partners house and I offered that I would pay £600 per month (not including food, I contribute separately to this). I came to this number as this was the amount I used to pay for my mortgage + service charge at my flat.

I have since found out that his bills (utilities only) total £800 per month but in recent months, he has been reducing these e.g cancelling sky and moving onto a cheaper energy tarriff (his electric car sucks most of the energy!) so essentially, I am paying for more than 50% of the bills here and he always said prior to me moving in that he didn’t need any help with the mortgage… HOWEVER I am better off than when I was living at my flat (£725 pre inflation) 🙁.

Do you think my contribution is too much? I am essentially paying £200 towards his mortgage here…

Please help x

You are all bonkers! £600 a month contribution towards living costs is less than she would pay as a lodger. If you are not happy OP go and lodge with astringent for more.

If he’s made recent changes to the utilities, I think it’s fair to ask that you have a quick review of how you’re contributing, with a view to realigning with current bills. Paying him some rent on top of utilities doesn’t seem unfair to me, so what if he uses it towards his mortgage? Someone else is doing the same for you.

Op already owns her own place unless I’m mistaken ! She’s renting it out …..

she won’t get a beneficial k retest in his house at all nor should she

OP is also getting her mortgage paid off through this arrangement (her place being empty to rent out).

OP, I think you are the one taking the piss - this arrangement means your whole mortgage is taken care of but he's still paying nearly all of his.

How much rent are you getting from your flat? If you are much better off each month by living at his and he's only slightly better off, then I'd sit down and decide what's fair.

Hmmm.
You should split utilities but at end of day if shit hits fan you're homeless.
No no to paying towards his mortgage. Save that towards your own house or to buying together. He's being greedy

So instead she should pay him to share his bed, have sex with him and form a life together? While he builds equity on a home - subsidised by her - she has no rights to and can be kicked out of in a second?

Gross.

My love in boyfriend pays half the utilities which I manage -no rent element.

I juggle around utilities and cancel say Netflix and go to Disney. I don't remit his share every month.

I just once a year do a reworking and adjust his payment going forward.

£800 fir bills is a lot though. Large house i assume (so high council tax and elec/gas)

Of course if he said you need to pay x as I got say sky sports for you at £50 extra per month, I'd query that but if he is just moving suppliers and getting new customers deals, I don't see an issue.

For about 15 years of my relationship with DP we lived in his house and I paid him a lump sum every month. He sat down, worked out the household outgoings on mortgage, utilities and council tax, and then just split it in proportion to our salaries so he was paying 65% and I was paying 35%. But during that time, when he switched utilities, changed the TV and broadband package or whatever, he would recalculate and adjust things accordingly - he didn’t just carry on charging me the same amount and pocketing the excess as profit!!

I think half utilities and plus say £100/£200 a month rent

Have you rented it out because you have moved in with your partner? When you say barely any profit is made presumably the rent covers your mortgage or most of your mortgage?

In which case it sounds like you have a pretty good deal. You’re able to have your mortgage paid by someone else and then pay just £200 towards your partners mortgage.

I’d have a sit-down discussion with your partner to work out what you both feel is fair - include all incoming and outgoings (including your mortgage and the rent you receive).

Also, the people saying OP would have a right to a proportion of his property by paying money towards his mortgage are incorrect. Only if she had paid funds directly into his mortgage account would she have any claim.

This has got to be one of the most disingenuous Poor Menz post I’ve seen for some time! Who said she shouldn’t pay anything?

Split the bills and living costs how you wish (50/50 or proportionate to salary) but I'd not suggest anyone pays towards anyone's mortgage in a romantic relationship unless it's drawn up on the deeds accordingly.

The red flag here to me is that he's looking for ways to save money on utilities, but isn't being open about it or passing these savings to OP. It would leave me questioning if I'm on the same page as him financially.

I don't think you're paying "too much" if you're paying less than it would cost you to rent elsewhere. I do think it's madness to put yourself in that financial situation though.

barely any profit is made on your own property.

Riiiight....

So you're making a profit off being a landlord but feel you should pay less than a lodger would to live in someone else's property.

I think you're the CF here. Do you think this dude is cancelling stuff and switching to cheaper tariffs for the hell of it?

She pays £600

I agree, £600 is a steal! I think it would be normal to pay half of bills plus a bit as “rent”.

When DH moved into the flat I owned, he paid half of everything including the mortgage (we had paperwork signed so he had no right to it, we weren't married then) . He was perfectly happy to, he was saving loads in rent and didn't expect to live off me. Everyone has housing costs pretty much, you're just paying either the bank or your landlord. More than half of the monthly outgoings on that flat eye mortgage and service charge, so if I'd paid those and he'd paid half the bills I would've had significantly higher outgoings than him. That's not a partnership.
He benefited in the end anyway, that flat went towards a hefty deposit on our house.

What do you mean by “that financial situation” please…

Funding living arrangements where you have no financial interest and no security of tenure. Especially if you were previously in a position to own your own place.

She does own her own place. She is renting it out. So OP is not putting herself in any kind of tricky financial situation from what I can gather

I do own my own place just FYI. I am a landlord and have tenants living there.

Correct, thank you x

£800 for utilities alone sounds very expensive, ours are £370-420 depending on if tv license is due. I do think you should pay 'rent' though considering you have someone renting your house and paying off your mortgage. Do you know how much his mortgage is?

Yes but 400 of that is her half of the bills.

Half the bills plus £200pcm rent is fine. What isn't fine is if the bills go down and he doesn't then pass on half the reduction to you.

So you pay £200 rent and half (£400) toward bills. If bills are going down the £400 needs revising.

That seems fair. Though I wouldn’t be happy with him cancelling sky, or similar without discussing it if I was paying for half of it.